Mental illness?

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Destruction, Sep 9, 2019.

  1. Destruction

    Destruction Junior Member

    Anyone on here with any diagnosed mental illness? I have been recently diagnosed and it is quite a weird one according to my psychiatrist, some weird personality flip between BPD and ASD, which are opposite to each other. I found it interesting, anyone else?
  2. LeoTC

    LeoTC Member

  3. 350lift

    350lift Member

    Nope I just walk around pissed all the time I actually tried to see someone, they just offered anti depressants.

    Fuck that. Kolonopin is the one thing I’ll take but I gotta watch myself w it. I don’t have temptations but the drug is what it is. Mellows me out well

    I don’t think I trust another human to diagnose me or most people mentally when they don’t know the shit I’ve been through and haven’t been in my shoes. What time they went to bed at night, the stuff in their life and what they ate for breakfast could all effect what they think that day.

    Maybe I am depressed or currently unhappy with life, but it’s for good reason, and until I find something to replace that reason and see more positively, it is what it is. I won’t have a permanent label slapped on me and I won’t pretend I’m not capable of changing. That’s all I’ve done in my life is changed.

    I’m not one of these happy happy small talk kinda people in life. The kind that walk outside with a smile on their face everywhere they go. I’m typically a lot more serious just from what I’ve been exposed to. I already know my problems anyways. I’m impulsive, a bit fed up with life, bit hopeless atm. Don’t need some 40 year old woman who drank her ass off in college at the bars to suddenly know who I am without walking in my shoes.
    I don’t fuckin think so.

    ... anyways I’m bored af so that’s why this was long as hell
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2019
  4. LeoTC

    LeoTC Member

    That's a recipe for a long and miserable life. If you need to replace something with something else, there's a void within yourself.

    Whatever fills it isn't going to be anything more than another temporary fixation. False 'happiness.'

    As far as being positive goes? It's kind of something you have to work at, and for a lot of people it takes genuine effort. It isn't about being mindlessly optimistic or even happy. It's about putting the best possible version of yourself forward at any given moment. Trusting that even if things don't get better, they could definitely be worse.

    That's strength, that's power.

    You get out of life what you put into it, Guy. If you walk around pissed off and miserable all the time, you'll stay that way.

    Destruction, Big_paul and 350lift like this.
  5. 350lift

    350lift Member

    Very true-ur entire post. I’m working on it. But man my life was miserable since before all this gear stuff. Had 5 months of straight heaven I felt so good about my life and myself and it all got ripped away by a mysterious chest infection that’s scarred my chest and my mind permanently-moreso the physical part.

    I almost purposely don’t wanna allow myself to be okay with how it looks. I don’t wanna just feel better about it I want it to heal or I just want to hate everything because of it. I had envisioned a better life than I had previously to gear and it was becoming true.

    The way these scars left me has me so torn up day in day out it’s either putting trust in god and then like hours later despising god or just not even believing there is one because my heads still spinning from something that happened a year and a half ago.

    Honest truth, I don’t think I’ll ever get over it. I got nothing right now, and even if I had the entire world I could still look at these scars and trade the world for them to heal.

    But you’re right I’m only hurting myself with this thought process. But I have tendencies to be self destructive when things don’t go my way. I almost just wanna let myself be destroyed now because of how unexpected this whole situation was.

    Ha, I got a lot to work through.
    And when I said replace it with something else I meant if I get a career n family and kids basically (if that ever happens)
    Destruction likes this.
  6. 350lift

    350lift Member

    The honest truth is I have caused all my own problems, but this one specific is so damn hard to accept becaus this case was such a rare outcome.

    Anyways sorry not to derail the thread
    Destruction likes this.
  7. Uglyrichie

    Uglyrichie Member

    I have been eating pills for the last 17 years and I will say it's the best thing I've done. But that's me When I get tired of taking them I go back to the same behavior. Shit runs in my family and drinking and drugs from a early age probably didn't help
    Destruction likes this.
  8. TideGear

    TideGear Member

    You guys ever watched Ryan Holiday on YouTube? He has some very good videos on stoicism that might really help some of you, if you can adopt that way of thinking. One of his good ones talks about measuring success by internal metrics rather than external. Imo, people need to relearn how to think. Too much of how we feel it's based on external events that don't truly matter.
  9. flenser

    flenser Member Supporter

    I never believed in any of this stuff until it happened to a member of my family. The change was instant and permanent, like throwing a switch. She is still struggling to keep it under control years later.

    At the same time I would say any psychiatrist that gives you a fucked up combo diagnosis like that shouldn't be trusted. Get a second opinion, and a third. Those diagnoses are already subjective as hell, and they use them to prescribe seriously life changing meds.

  10. @350lift I understand your depression , and anger . Becoming less of yourself is always hard to deal with . But its just life progression (we just get uglier as we get older)

    It can always be worst didnt lose your limbs because your dog licked you did you ? ;)

  11. Uglyrichie

    Uglyrichie Member

    Sorry if the quote thing is off still figuring this out. My therapist says something similar that I need to retrain my brain so I don't ruminate or get obsessive over crap
    Destruction, flenser and TideGear like this.
  12. 350lift

    350lift Member

    Wow. REALLY. Bad morning for me. That’s what happens when u stay up til 8am and take l tyrosine the night before, not doing that again!
    Destruction likes this.
  13. LeoTC

    LeoTC Member

    That's why DBT is the go to for both.

    Because, yes, a lot of people need to learn how to manage thoughts and reactions. Be less reactive.

    Never gone for pills or therapy. But being wholly stoic will make you just as miserable. Always been and it took years to unlearn and actually communicate/ Express myself.
    Uglyrichie and TideGear like this.
  14. TideGear

    TideGear Member

    I agree that you should have balance. Just ignoring everything won't be helpful either. Good point.
  15. Destruction

    Destruction Junior Member

    I used both a healthy lifestyle and some professional help. I am definitely a lot better now. I get a little depersonalisation every now and then, but nothing serious.