My FARTS smell so damn TERRIBLE....

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Fast Food, May 18, 2004.

  1. #1
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member

    My farts have smelled so damn terrible as of late its not even funny. I eat the 6 egg whites every morning out of the container.... i think its called something like Pepetti All Whites.... well my farts around now everyday come out reaaaaaaal warm and smelling like those damn eggs when they are cooking...

    it got so bad last week that when my cubicle buddy (we have big cubicles but it doesnt matter, its potent) was out of town, my chair stunk so damn bad that I said screw this and had to change chairs.... I know for a fact when she got back yesterday and sat down she HAD to have been like, "oh my god what is going on, i think i'm going to die, what is this... serine gas from Iraq???" I know this because everytime i used to sit down it smelled like i was farting because the smell got so bad that i tried to smother it in my seat and i guess it got stuck in the foam cushion.... well yesterday I had the opportunity to get a nicer lombard chair so i took it.... well already today the same thing is happening... but when i let it go instead of trying to trap it into the seat, its so damn bad that i feel like the window washers outside can smell it.... those damn egg whites!

    and on top of that, my boss must think i either never do work or just fuck around all the time, because i have to piss at least once or twice every hour and to get to the bathroom i have to pass her door..... my body is dying!

    how are y'alls farts doin?
     
  2. #2
    finafreak

    finafreak Junior Member



    LMAO

    FINA
     
  3. #3
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    i'm not even lying man.... i used to bend over and sniff my chair just to make sure.... and omg, i dont wish that upon anybody..... :eek:
     
  4. #4
    finafreak

    finafreak Junior Member


    THE THINGS WE DO TO BE IN SHAPE :D FUKING UP BRAND NEW BOXERS,SMELLING LIKE SHIT ALL DAY.


    FINA
     
  5. #5
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    aint that the truth.... i have a 25 minute ride to where i need to be for work and i had to pull over on the shoulder of I-95 this morning and take a leak.... at 630 in the morning.... that was my 4th piss of the day
     
  6. #6
    Chip Bronson

    Chip Bronson Junior Member

    i feel you bro. my wife can't stand me sometimes. i take bean AND xtra strength simethicone (otc gas preventer) and i sitll wreak... lol... but when you're eating 300gm of protein ed, it's hard to avoid this problem. i guess it's all part of the game. :D
     
  7. #7
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    and i'm at about 400 or more of protein ed...... those egg whites get me everytime.... and it smells JUST like when i was cooking them at 515 a.m.
     
  8. #8
    finafreak

    finafreak Junior Member


    ONLY 6 EGG WHITES ROOKIE,.IVE BEEN EATING 10 EGG WHITES EVERY MORNING,.,AND FRESH OUT OF THE EGG SHELL :D SO I GUESS IM JUST A WALKING TIME BOMB..


    FINA
     
  9. #9
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member




    well i could eat regular egg whites all day long.... but i'm eating it out of the box... TOTALLY different......... out of the box causes stinky farties
     
  10. #10
    PUMPED101

    PUMPED101 Junior Member

    haha this thread is too funny

    but i am on the same boat with you guys
    i try to get at least 400 grams of protein a day....does a number on my stomach..i take 3-4 shits a day with the food i consume in a day

    4-5 meals
    3-4 shakes
    1.5-2 gal water

    my girl always tells me my life is lifting, eating, and shitting...poor girl
     
  11. #11
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    yeah but we look good.... lol...

    sounds like your meal plan is a lot like mine.... check mine out here...

    http://forum.mesomorphosis.com/showthread.php?p=157519#post157519

    and i drink 1-2 gallons of distilled water everyday as well
     
  12. #12
    dolfe1

    dolfe1 Junior Member

    Go to a movie store on a Friday or Saterday night and just let loose, you want to always keep moving that way no one really knows it's you and you can cover the whole store. Once you've made your rounds check peoples reactions. lol
     
  13. #13
    PUMPED101

    PUMPED101 Junior Member

    OMG HAAHAHA

    I am the asshole that does it on an airplane..got to make sure they are silent though or your in trouble...
     
  14. #14
    Bob Smith

    Bob Smith Member

    LOL, the dreaded sneak attack!

    Luckily Ive been rather fresh smelling since I dropped eating a pound of brocolli a day. Holy shit was that bbaaaaaaaadddd!!
     
  15. #15
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    thats bad! on an airplane! i try so hard not to do that... its a stuffy cabin as it is... i'd just bust out laughing if i let and EGGBOMB go off.... maybe i need to stick my own (TM) PT up my ass to stop it..... on second thought.... FUCK THAT!
     
  16. #16
    dolfe1

    dolfe1 Junior Member

    lol That's the hard part, accomplishing the mission without laughing, and if you do burst out just point to your gf holding your nose and say damn honey!
     
  17. #17
    Fast Food

    Fast Food Junior Member


    nah i cant do that.... what i would say is... (and i have done this before)

    "Damn, somebody is not feeling well at all.... thats terrible, who would do that!" and try not to get red.... lol
     
  18. #18
    PUMPED101

    PUMPED101 Junior Member


    your meal plan looks a lot cleaner than mine...

    mine consists of a lot more

    pizza, burgers, cheese, fast food....

    still got a six when i flex my abs, but if i am not flexin it looks like shit...i have to start cardio soon....actually today probably
     
  19. #19
    PUMPED101

    PUMPED101 Junior Member

    trust me i sit their trying not laugh, as the stench lingers around the airplane....its to funny though

    on the same kinda topic...have you bros ever used those little metal whistlers that you stick in an exhaust pipe and the cars whistles and sounds like a fan belt is loose? Try to stick one in your friends car and drive around with him and not laugh.... every time he gets on the gas it starts making the nose...funniest prank in the world
     
  20. #20
    Neodavid

    Neodavid Junior Member

    Wouldn't the thumb help you out here?


     

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