i been messing around in the gym for about 20 years. I'll go back n fourth with training for aesthetics and powerlifting. I have come to the conclusion that most of my training has been filed by my ego. I have fun, no matter what I do in the gym. My numbers as a PL are only average for my height and weight. Perhaps a bit more then average. Genetically I'm predisposed to be a bodybuilder. 5'7 with a build like Franco. Franco is one of my idols btw. Ego is a huge factor in BB. Ego also plays a big roll in my PL ventures, simply because to lift the most is the Macho, Manly beat on your chest after a PR thing to do. At this point I'm bored with hypertrophy. It helped me get to where I want to be. While chasing my goal of becoming a Mr. O, I used, misused and abused gear. Stupid amounts of Test. Nandrolone for months on end. Trenbolone cuz it's trenbolone. Oh man, multiple orals several time in a year too. The time I spent PL was so much more simple with gear. Test and one other compound. No orals at all. My best training ever was a routine referred to as "The Texas Method" My ANABOLICS were simple, 500 test, 500 Nandralone "NPP" or trenbolone. I felt great with only 2 compounds. While training Texas Method I made some of the best progress I ever made. All my numbers went up about 2lbs a week. This was what I did for 16 weeks. I loved it. The best part about it is I looked my best too, now that I look at some old pictures. My problem was that I wasn't putting up the big boy numbers like my bros. My ego would always taunt me by saying "if you wanna do a PL meet you better up the dose" Or "why compete in something your only gonna place 5th in" Or "Your gonna injur yourself training heavy, you need to dreaming of being a PL and focus more on BB, time under tension and light weights" I'm finally pulling my head outa my ass. I'm realizing that powerlifting is much more fulfilling then BB. The commrodery I had with the men and women of the sport was amazing. Not to mention the caliber of athletes I was training with was top of the line. Powerlifting opened up many doors for me. One day I'd be training with my buddy Nick and the next day I'm training with a few guys from the Sherifs office. I like to eat too. I'm good on meal prep. I'd rather eat as much as I want and still look good. The one thing I really like about BB is the pumps! I found that I can PL and still get awesome pupms. I simply make a day to train accessories. BIS, TRIS, PECS, DELTS, QUADS. So from this point on it'll be a style of training that is geared for powerlifting. The big 3. I'm not gonna concern myself with other people's numbers. No matter what I do, my goal is to have fun. Im on TRT for life because of my poor choices I made years ago. My ego played a big roll in that. Im gonna train and not let my ego dictate how I train. 600 test 600 npp or tren Also, with short esters I can do some quality 8 wk cycles. I'm gonna keep a detailed log when I start in a few weeks. This post is only a rant of an epiphany I just had. I'm gonna focus on having fun and less on what others may or may not think of me.