I posted a earlier thread asking for help with potentially restarting my HPTA after years of legitimate uneducated and unreasearched steroid abuse. My current state is horrible, my skin is dry and constantly flaking all over my face and head; my hair is falling out and getting thinner by the day and my quality of life for the last 8-10 months is so low I dont even know what I am living for. That is just a quick run down at where I am today January 19th/2015.
I am mainly doing this because I hope to bring attention and awareness to those who are about to embark on steroids or any young guys thinking they want to do them so they either reconsider their decision or atleast take the proper measures to do them properly, effectively and safely. I probably began doing steroids when I was 20. I never knew anything about them other then what "my friend" told me to do with them after I purchased them off of him. Looking back on my experiences from when I was 20 up until today when I am currently 26 years of age, I can def say Ive had low t and andropause more then once throughout the 5-6 years I did them.
I have had no luck finding a doctor locally who understands steroids and the extent of true steroid abuse or who is knowledgeable enough to potentially help me fix my system. My family doctor basically treats me like a drug addict (which is fair I can honestly say the amount of things I did and how much I was doing them, I was def addicted to steroids and the physical enhancements I constantly felt) therefore making it hard to come to some sort of treatment plan in order to get me back to normal and he says no endocrinologist would have a solution to my issue, My family doctor said there was nothing they could do for me, and that I would have to just continue, wait and see if my body bounces back; my daily life is horrible & hard to sometimes even go out in public with all the symptoms I am CONSTANTLY having to deal with aswell as the fact I am not growing like a normal man should be (no energy, depression, lethargy, weakness, gyno, unable to sleep, unable to concentrate, gained about 30 pounds of fat, constantly dryness of skin all over my face and now in my scalp (claims it seborrhea dermatitis) hair thinning and falling out.)
I had probably been doing steroids for around 30 months without any true knowledge of them the main things I did was Test Prop , Masteron prop , Anavar, Winstrol, Clenbutrol and 12 months of HGH aswell as 3 months of IGF-1. my main source I trusted so much and financially smart on his part due to my consistency in regards to feeding his pockets with my money he told me I could basically just keep juicing without need pct, aslong as I stayed on the stuff and took this liquid armidex he gave me.
Now I had also been competitively running and kickboxing; infact I had gotten to the point where I had a few good opportunities if I wanted to move to the USA. Now clearly I knew I had a problem due to the whole steroids thing, I went to my doctor in January of 2014 I had this fucking ultimate warrior looking rash on my face, and I was sick of it tried everything to get rid of it and he told me it was dermatitis. I told him hey this is what I have been doing (PED related), I dont want to do them anymore, Im afraid I might have low t etc. My doctor simply looked at me and said "you dont have low t" didnt do any blood test look at anything, just basically told me I was fine, my face was from dermatitis, and I would be fine regardless of the steroids aslong as I stopped doing them.
Now for the next 8-9 months my life turned into hell, I lost alot of muscle but I didn't really think anything of it due to the fact I was trying to get leaner for running competitively and going into a lower weight class for kickboxing, my diet was pristine. I lost roughly 15-20 pounds in 1 1/2 - 3 months, I began walking around at 150 I used to walk around at 168.8-172 also I went from a 32 to 30 waist. I didnt think anything of it other then I was getting better athletically (began placing 1-4th in 10k races I could run a 10k in 31 minutes, my faster km was 3:15 seconds , could easily make 135 pounds for kickboxing) and I thought i was "fine" because my doctor had told me so and I had been a physical specimen for the last 2 1/2 years like I was a fucking machine even after I had lost the weight. anyways probably around end of july things took a turn for the worst mentally and all else, I began basically feeling extremely weak and uninterested in any type of athletics and andropause needless to say fucked me up.
I didnt even think of low t because I was told I would be fine by my doctor etc etc, so I just kept trying to ride out what I thought was just depression because of where I was at in my life with current events (friends death etc) but I began getting super weak and lethargic, didnt wanna go anywhere or do anything and I couldnt mentally process things or properly word anything, I basically felt braindead. I ended up going to a walk in clinic and saying I think I have low t after months upon months of hell.
On September 17th 2014 I got the following labs;
TSH = 2.0 mU/L (0.27-4.2 mU/L)
FSH = 11.5 IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = 3.9 IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
Prolactin = 8.6 (<15 ug/L)
PSA = 0.83 (<2.5 ug/L)
Estradiol = 100 (<150 pmol/L)
Testerosterone = 4.6 nmol/L (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
SHBG = 16 nmol (10.0-70.0 nmol/L)
Then at the end of September the doctor put me on 20mg Novaldex and 200mg Test Cypionate every 14 days. I did the Test cypionate probably only 2-3 shots, I just was so turned off of steroids and what they had done to me I just couldn't stand putting them into myself I felt that absolute shit and had to leave the job I was working because I couldn't get myself out of bed, I was so depressed and had such bag brain fog I couldn't even concentrate on anything work related.
I got more blood work done towards the end of October.
October 20th 2014, Theese are my labs.
FSH = 1.3IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = <1.0 (10.0 IU/L)
Testosterone = 12.3 (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
After seeing these results, I became hopeless and didnt want to inject anymore testosterone; I basically became bed ridden had no energy for anything didnt want anyone to see me didnt go anywhere couldnt do anything fucking ate absolute garbage, didnt work out and i gained like 34 pounds, it got to the point where I honestly felt life would be better if I killed myself. I stayed like this from end of October to beginning of december.
I got these blood tests done on November 25th 2014;
FSH = 9.8 (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = 3.8 (<10.0 IU/L)
Testosterone = 11.4 (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
Now, after my doctor tried to tell me everything symptom wise even the EXTREME flaking of skin on my face, (I literally looked like the fucking ultimate warriors face paint was permanently etched into my face lol) I had been dealing with for the last 8-10 months had all been "in my head" and push anti depressants onto me I basically first off got extremely upset and pissed off, and second off clearly said fuck it and I made a stupid choice I got testosterone from a buddy & did test propionate at 150 mg every other day from December up until end of December
I got more labs;
Test was >52.0 /// (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
Estriadol - 183 /// <150
After I got these bloods back, I stopped taking the test. However I will say my face began to fix itself when I was doing the test and that I felt hundred times more ready to try and fix the mess I had gotten in and get back to my athletics and such. Now that was great momentary until I wasnt loosing weight and had to keep shooting myself. I also got these back and was just so displeased with myself, due to the high test and estrogen and just sick of doing steroid. Now without taking the test shots, my skins fucked up its so terrible my hairs back to falling out and thinning, gaining weight again & being depressed. I want to atleast be somewhat normal and functional, and I know these symptoms are also destroying my life, so ive decided to give the power pct protocol a shot.
I finally was able to get enough money for the pct protocol I have read up on alot on them & I just think Id rather take a shot at this then continuing to do steroids or testosterone.
Days 1-16 HCG 2500Iu EOD
Days 1-30 Clomid 100mg ED
Days 1-45 nolva 20mg ED
Ill keep everyone posted and I would like anyone to feel free to direct anyone they know who is considering getting involved with steroids, or is doing them and to urge them to read my story and the importance to proper and careful use. Theres not much good in my situation for myself, but I feel like if I could do something positive with this fucked up negative I created, then atleast theres something good of it.
I am mainly doing this because I hope to bring attention and awareness to those who are about to embark on steroids or any young guys thinking they want to do them so they either reconsider their decision or atleast take the proper measures to do them properly, effectively and safely. I probably began doing steroids when I was 20. I never knew anything about them other then what "my friend" told me to do with them after I purchased them off of him. Looking back on my experiences from when I was 20 up until today when I am currently 26 years of age, I can def say Ive had low t and andropause more then once throughout the 5-6 years I did them.
I have had no luck finding a doctor locally who understands steroids and the extent of true steroid abuse or who is knowledgeable enough to potentially help me fix my system. My family doctor basically treats me like a drug addict (which is fair I can honestly say the amount of things I did and how much I was doing them, I was def addicted to steroids and the physical enhancements I constantly felt) therefore making it hard to come to some sort of treatment plan in order to get me back to normal and he says no endocrinologist would have a solution to my issue, My family doctor said there was nothing they could do for me, and that I would have to just continue, wait and see if my body bounces back; my daily life is horrible & hard to sometimes even go out in public with all the symptoms I am CONSTANTLY having to deal with aswell as the fact I am not growing like a normal man should be (no energy, depression, lethargy, weakness, gyno, unable to sleep, unable to concentrate, gained about 30 pounds of fat, constantly dryness of skin all over my face and now in my scalp (claims it seborrhea dermatitis) hair thinning and falling out.)
I had probably been doing steroids for around 30 months without any true knowledge of them the main things I did was Test Prop , Masteron prop , Anavar, Winstrol, Clenbutrol and 12 months of HGH aswell as 3 months of IGF-1. my main source I trusted so much and financially smart on his part due to my consistency in regards to feeding his pockets with my money he told me I could basically just keep juicing without need pct, aslong as I stayed on the stuff and took this liquid armidex he gave me.
Now I had also been competitively running and kickboxing; infact I had gotten to the point where I had a few good opportunities if I wanted to move to the USA. Now clearly I knew I had a problem due to the whole steroids thing, I went to my doctor in January of 2014 I had this fucking ultimate warrior looking rash on my face, and I was sick of it tried everything to get rid of it and he told me it was dermatitis. I told him hey this is what I have been doing (PED related), I dont want to do them anymore, Im afraid I might have low t etc. My doctor simply looked at me and said "you dont have low t" didnt do any blood test look at anything, just basically told me I was fine, my face was from dermatitis, and I would be fine regardless of the steroids aslong as I stopped doing them.
Now for the next 8-9 months my life turned into hell, I lost alot of muscle but I didn't really think anything of it due to the fact I was trying to get leaner for running competitively and going into a lower weight class for kickboxing, my diet was pristine. I lost roughly 15-20 pounds in 1 1/2 - 3 months, I began walking around at 150 I used to walk around at 168.8-172 also I went from a 32 to 30 waist. I didnt think anything of it other then I was getting better athletically (began placing 1-4th in 10k races I could run a 10k in 31 minutes, my faster km was 3:15 seconds , could easily make 135 pounds for kickboxing) and I thought i was "fine" because my doctor had told me so and I had been a physical specimen for the last 2 1/2 years like I was a fucking machine even after I had lost the weight. anyways probably around end of july things took a turn for the worst mentally and all else, I began basically feeling extremely weak and uninterested in any type of athletics and andropause needless to say fucked me up.
I didnt even think of low t because I was told I would be fine by my doctor etc etc, so I just kept trying to ride out what I thought was just depression because of where I was at in my life with current events (friends death etc) but I began getting super weak and lethargic, didnt wanna go anywhere or do anything and I couldnt mentally process things or properly word anything, I basically felt braindead. I ended up going to a walk in clinic and saying I think I have low t after months upon months of hell.
On September 17th 2014 I got the following labs;
TSH = 2.0 mU/L (0.27-4.2 mU/L)
FSH = 11.5 IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = 3.9 IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
Prolactin = 8.6 (<15 ug/L)
PSA = 0.83 (<2.5 ug/L)
Estradiol = 100 (<150 pmol/L)
Testerosterone = 4.6 nmol/L (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
SHBG = 16 nmol (10.0-70.0 nmol/L)
Then at the end of September the doctor put me on 20mg Novaldex and 200mg Test Cypionate every 14 days. I did the Test cypionate probably only 2-3 shots, I just was so turned off of steroids and what they had done to me I just couldn't stand putting them into myself I felt that absolute shit and had to leave the job I was working because I couldn't get myself out of bed, I was so depressed and had such bag brain fog I couldn't even concentrate on anything work related.
I got more blood work done towards the end of October.
October 20th 2014, Theese are my labs.
FSH = 1.3IU/L (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = <1.0 (10.0 IU/L)
Testosterone = 12.3 (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
After seeing these results, I became hopeless and didnt want to inject anymore testosterone; I basically became bed ridden had no energy for anything didnt want anyone to see me didnt go anywhere couldnt do anything fucking ate absolute garbage, didnt work out and i gained like 34 pounds, it got to the point where I honestly felt life would be better if I killed myself. I stayed like this from end of October to beginning of december.
I got these blood tests done on November 25th 2014;
FSH = 9.8 (<10.0 IU/L)
LH = 3.8 (<10.0 IU/L)
Testosterone = 11.4 (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
Now, after my doctor tried to tell me everything symptom wise even the EXTREME flaking of skin on my face, (I literally looked like the fucking ultimate warriors face paint was permanently etched into my face lol) I had been dealing with for the last 8-10 months had all been "in my head" and push anti depressants onto me I basically first off got extremely upset and pissed off, and second off clearly said fuck it and I made a stupid choice I got testosterone from a buddy & did test propionate at 150 mg every other day from December up until end of December
I got more labs;
Test was >52.0 /// (8.4-28.8 nmol/L)
Estriadol - 183 /// <150
After I got these bloods back, I stopped taking the test. However I will say my face began to fix itself when I was doing the test and that I felt hundred times more ready to try and fix the mess I had gotten in and get back to my athletics and such. Now that was great momentary until I wasnt loosing weight and had to keep shooting myself. I also got these back and was just so displeased with myself, due to the high test and estrogen and just sick of doing steroid. Now without taking the test shots, my skins fucked up its so terrible my hairs back to falling out and thinning, gaining weight again & being depressed. I want to atleast be somewhat normal and functional, and I know these symptoms are also destroying my life, so ive decided to give the power pct protocol a shot.
I finally was able to get enough money for the pct protocol I have read up on alot on them & I just think Id rather take a shot at this then continuing to do steroids or testosterone.
Days 1-16 HCG 2500Iu EOD
Days 1-30 Clomid 100mg ED
Days 1-45 nolva 20mg ED
Ill keep everyone posted and I would like anyone to feel free to direct anyone they know who is considering getting involved with steroids, or is doing them and to urge them to read my story and the importance to proper and careful use. Theres not much good in my situation for myself, but I feel like if I could do something positive with this fucked up negative I created, then atleast theres something good of it.
