Tren/Test Log

[Mike Oxbig]

ALRIGHT, I've done a few cycles and have been "on" since April of 2014. The cycle I started then was with bunk gear(I was one of the members competing with gear for the MLF contest, for those of you that remember that fiasco.) I did one cycle since then with bullshit gear and an additional cycle with legit gear that was ended prematurely after a few weeks due to a drug relapse(amphetamine.)

About 6 weeks ago I started a tren/test(500/200) cycle but have been experiencing issues with alcoholism which has obviously stunted my gains. The main purpose of this thread is to give me accountability and hopefully further improve my progress. Despite the fact that I've been 'on' for year and a half, my physique wouldn't show it due to the issues I've had with substance abuse/garbage gear. I'm honestly even smaller than I was at the end of my first cycle I did a few years ago.

I'm currently 6'0" and 223 lbs at roughly 15-16% BF. I'll update this thread with 'before' pictures within the next day or two.

I'm also hoping to hook up with one of those fine ass fitness bishes that constantly eye-fuck me at the gym, so this thread will serve as motivation for that in addition to my sobriety. LET'S FUCK SHIT UP.

 

[jaymaximus]

SUB-D.
Get it!

 

[Colt44]

Get after it Mike. Stay clear of the booze. I'll be following along of course.

 

[Whoremoans]

Subbed.

 

[biggerben69]

I'm also hoping to hook up with one of those fine ass fitness bishes that constantly eye-fuck me at the gym, so this thread will serve as motivation for that in addition to my sobriety. LET'S FUCK SHIT UP.

Don't worry Mike. The hallucinations will stop after a week or so off the booze. LOl...eye fucking you!! Hey, you haven't lost your sense of humor! Love ya Mike. Glad your getting it together. Doing the things we do chances of getting jammed up increase 10 fold when you're high/drunk running around with all the illegal substances.

 

[Mike Oxbig]

Don't worry Mike. The hallucinations will stop after a week or so off the booze. LOl...eye fucking you!! Hey, you haven't lost your sense of humor! Love ya Mike. Glad your getting it together. Doing the things we do chances of getting jammed up increase 10 fold when you're high/drunk running around with all the illegal substances.

Play nice, Ben. Play nice... I'm a fragile soul...

 

[brutus79]

Let's do it ox. Pm me whenever my friend.

 

[TANGO.ECHO.KILO]

Welcome home big guy...
you can get back on track, you know what you gotta do.

 

[Haunch]

eat, sleep, lift and fuck. Work if you have too, haha.
Good luck Mike, hope it all works out for you. YANA

 

[Secret of Steel]

Okay bud, I'm going to try this with you. My drinking hasn't been quite like yours, but it has been daily. I got through yesterday without anything, so I'm trying again today.

(Of course, I am treating my situation as an experiment for now. I know that if I want to quit for good, I'm going to have to go the AA route again. And boy does that suck.)

 

[Wunderpus]

ALRIGHT, I've done a few cycles and have been "on" since April of 2014. The cycle I started then was with bunk gear(I was one of the members competing with gear for the MLF contest, for those of you that remember that fiasco.) I did one cycle since then with bullshit gear and an additional cycle with legit gear that was ended prematurely after a few weeks due to a drug relapse(amphetamine.)

About 6 weeks ago I started a tren/test(500/200) cycle but have been experiencing issues with alcoholism which has obviously stunted my gains. The main purpose of this thread is to give me accountability and hopefully further improve my progress. Despite the fact that I've been 'on' for year and a half, my physique wouldn't show it due to the issues I've had with substance abuse/garbage gear. I'm honestly even smaller than I was at the end of my first cycle I did a few years ago.

I'm currently 6'0" and 223 lbs at roughly 15-16% BF. I'll update this thread with 'before' pictures within the next day or two.

I'm also hoping to hook up with one of those fine ass fitness bishes that constantly eye-fuck me at the gym, so this thread will serve as motivation for that in addition to my sobriety. LET'S FUCK SHIT UP.

Love your Avi, best of luck! I'll be checking the thread!

 

[Mike Oxbig]

Fuck, I underestimated how much temptation there would be for me to continue drinking. First order of business when I woke up yesterday was to trash all my liquor which I did but I kept trying to justify buying more the entire day.

"If I buy a handle right now and get shitfaced to the point of borderline alcohol poisoning I won't want to drink anymore after today, it's needed for my continued sobriety." The fact that I was attempting to justify it with addict rationalization makes me realize it was more of an issue than I thought. In any event, still haven't drank since Monday night...

 

[ebkallday]

Fuck, I underestimated how much temptation there would be for me to continue drinking. First order of business when I woke up yesterday was to trash all my liquor which I did but I kept trying to justify buying more the entire day.

"If I buy a handle right now and get shitfaced to the point of borderline alcohol poisoning I won't want to drink anymore after today, it's needed for my continued sobriety." The fact that I was attempting to justify it with addict rationalization makes me realize it was more of an issue than I thought. In any event, still haven't drank since Monday night...

Stay strong Ox! Keep telling yourself "if it don't build muscle, it aint worth it". I am an alcoholic, been without a drink in almost 4 months. I have very short lived relapses for a couple of days before I kick it. Shit is hard my friend. It starts when I have a few beers at dinner or at a friend's house while watching the game. The next day I find myself trying to make an excuse to stop by the liquor store all day long. If I can get past that day without buying in, then I am golden. Keep your head focused on gains and stay motivated brother and It will get easier.

Subbed.

 

[Oregongearhead]

Let's do it ox. Pm me whenever my friend.

I always planned my "get-sober day" , I would get totally shit faced on booze , usually added a strong drug like coke too to get a really nasty hangover . Then spent the days recupeing , eating , sleeping , video games or movies .

Within a couple more days , I would do pace walks , inside (too paranoid to go out) between one end of my 80ft trailer and the other . Between the front and rear it was 78 ft, so it was 156ft front & back . I walked that thousands of time . Smoked tons of cigs . No pot or anything else . Within a month or two added the weights back in .

Im a bad sleeper (and should be on CPAP , cant handle it), part of this came from alcohol the rest PTSD from my younger days . I spent the first few months/years night sweating & learning how to resleep . This is natural for most alcoholics . I still have mass insomnia , thats why that tren cycle brung back bad memories again , it was like kicking booze again . I suggest NO GEAR if your trying to get sober , definitely NO TREN . Only TRT if your on it .

Goodluck Mike , you got the tools and you got the support here . Just like Brutus , PM me whenever , been there done that ....~Ogh

 

[Mike Oxbig]

I always planned my "get-sober day" , I would get totally shit faced on booze , usually added a strong drug like coke too to get a really nasty hangover . Then spent the days recupeing , eating , sleeping , video games or movies .

Within a couple more days , I would do pace walks , inside (too paranoid to go out) between one end of my 80ft trailer and the other . Between the front and rear it was 78 ft, so it was 156ft front & back . I walked that thousands of time . Smoked tons of cigs . No pot or anything else . Within a month or two added the weights back in .

Im a bad sleeper (and should be on CPAP , cant handle it), part of this came from alcohol the rest PTSD from my younger days . I spent the first few months/years night sweating & learning how to resleep . This is natural for most alcoholics . I still have mass insomnia , thats why that tren cycle brung back bad memories again , it was like kicking booze again . I suggest NO GEAR if your trying to get sober , definitely NO TREN . Only TRT if your on it .

Goodluck Mike , you got the tools and you got the support here . Just like Brutus , PM me whenever , been there done that ....~Ogh

I don't think bailing on the cycle would be the best move for me, I luckily don't experience any tren sides other than increased body temp and my first cycle was the main contributing factor to my (moderate) success in getting off speed a few years back.

In any way, I'll be temporarily coming off in a couple months for fertility reasons and I'd like to get at least one legitimate cycle in before that time.

In any event, I'm god damn drunk right now. I thought I've been around enough to be able to kick this without an issue but I was apparently wrong. Picking up a bottle has been in the back of my mind ever since I quit Monday night but I somehow convinced myself to leave the gym after 15 minutes tonight in order to head to the liquor store before they closed.

I know I'll be able to kick this but it will be a bigger battle than I originally thought. Although I have a couple lady friends on the side to keep me satisfied I'm emotionally a bit lonely and I think that is a major contributing factor in my need to continuously self-medicate.

Regardless I'm still entirely motivated to keep on keepin' on. Sorry homies, but in any event I think that this thread will genuinely help me keep on track in the end. My old friend GHB is a tried and true treatment in alcoholism. Albeit it may seem like trading one addiction for another I think it will at least be a move in the right direction.

 

[Secret of Steel]

I don't think bailing on the cycle would be the best move for me, I luckily don't experience any tren sides other than increased body temp and my first cycle was the main contributing factor to my (moderate) success in getting off speed a few years back.

In any way, I'll be temporarily coming off in a couple months for fertility reasons and I'd like to get at least one legitimate cycle in before that time.

In any event, I'm god damn drunk right now. I thought I've been around enough to be able to kick this without an issue but I was apparently wrong. Picking up a bottle has been in the back of my mind ever since I quit Monday night but I somehow convinced myself to leave the gym after 15 minutes tonight in order to head to the liquor store before they closed.

I know I'll be able to kick this but it will be a bigger battle than I originally thought. Although I have a couple lady friends on the side to keep me satisfied I'm emotionally a bit lonely and I think that is a major contributing factor in my need to continuously self-medicate.

Regardless I'm still entirely motivated to keep on keepin' on. Sorry homies, but in any event I think that this thread will genuinely help me keep on track in the end. My old friend GHB is a tried and true treatment in alcoholism. Albeit it may seem like trading one addiction for another I think it will at least be a move in the right direction.

Coming off in 2 months for fertility teasons? A couple of lady friends? Whatever you're talking about, I hope you are not thinking of becoming a father any time this year.

Unfortunately, what you are doing is ensuring that something very, very bad must happen to you before you quit. Sometimes people hit a bottom when they lose a job or relationship, and that is enough. Other people have to hit a much lower bottom, like killing some kids in a drunk driving accident. That must be you.

GHB? No, AA.

 

[Flkrkr]

Wish you luck!

 

[brutus79]

I don't think bailing on the cycle would be the best move for me, I luckily don't experience any tren sides other than increased body temp and my first cycle was the main contributing factor to my (moderate) success in getting off speed a few years back.

In any way, I'll be temporarily coming off in a couple months for fertility reasons and I'd like to get at least one legitimate cycle in before that time.

In any event, I'm god damn drunk right now. I thought I've been around enough to be able to kick this without an issue but I was apparently wrong. Picking up a bottle has been in the back of my mind ever since I quit Monday night but I somehow convinced myself to leave the gym after 15 minutes tonight in order to head to the liquor store before they closed.

I know I'll be able to kick this but it will be a bigger battle than I originally thought. Although I have a couple lady friends on the side to keep me satisfied I'm emotionally a bit lonely and I think that is a major contributing factor in my need to continuously self-medicate.

Regardless I'm still entirely motivated to keep on keepin' on. Sorry homies, but in any event I think that this thread will genuinely help me keep on track in the end. My old friend GHB is a tried and true treatment in alcoholism. Albeit it may seem like trading one addiction for another I think it will at least be a move in the right direction.

I think being an addict/alcoholic might be a bit more to blame than loneliness my friend.

 

[biggerben69]

I don't think bailing on the cycle would be the best move for me, I luckily don't experience any tren sides other than increased body temp and my first cycle was the main contributing factor to my (moderate) success in getting off speed a few years back.

In any way, I'll be temporarily coming off in a couple months for fertility reasons and I'd like to get at least one legitimate cycle in before that time.

In any event, I'm god damn drunk right now. I thought I've been around enough to be able to kick this without an issue but I was apparently wrong. Picking up a bottle has been in the back of my mind ever since I quit Monday night but I somehow convinced myself to leave the gym after 15 minutes tonight in order to head to the liquor store before they closed.

I know I'll be able to kick this but it will be a bigger battle than I originally thought. Although I have a couple lady friends on the side to keep me satisfied I'm emotionally a bit lonely and I think that is a major contributing factor in my need to continuously self-medicate.

Regardless I'm still entirely motivated to keep on keepin' on. Sorry homies, but in any event I think that this thread will genuinely help me keep on track in the end. My old friend GHB is a tried and true treatment in alcoholism. Albeit it may seem like trading one addiction for another I think it will at least be a move in the right direction.

When I read your posts now and any other time in the past I read them as if you are speaking in a measured steady monotone. To me, you come across as a pretty steady mellow guy.
I don't know a whole lot about aa or na. I don't indulge in the things we discuss, mike. I'd rather sell the things you like and buy more. But I do know one thing...the things you are saying are things a crazy person would say. They don't make sense? I am of the opinion that you want to die...die and be miserable on your way out and maybe take some folks with you.
You and I don't know each other real well, but we've not known each other real well for a little bit. I like you, Mike. Others like you as well. Whatever it is you have to do to be ok, I think its time you get to it. I don't like the feeling that I'm getting here. It's like I feel like I need to say goodbye. Fix it, please.

 

[Mike Oxbig]

OK, although I'd rather not admit it, I will since I agreed to it in my original post. Despite my efforts I've had the better part of a liter over the past couple hours. This subtle vice has evidently transformed into a legitimate addiction.

It may be more serious than I originally presumed, but I WILL sort this out. I have before any I will again.

When I read your posts now and any other time in the past I read them as if you are speaking in a measured steady monotone. To me, you come across as a pretty steady mellow guy.
I don't know a whole lot about aa or na. I don't indulge in the things we discuss, mike. I'd rather sell the things you like and buy more. But I do know one thing...the things you are saying are things a crazy person would say. They don't make sense? I am of the opinion that you want to die...die and be miserable on your way out and maybe take some folks with you.
You and I don't know each other real well, but we've not known each other real well for a little bit. I like you, Mike. Others like you as well. Whatever it is you have to do to be ok, I think its time you get to it. I don't like the feeling that I'm getting here. It's like I feel like I need to say goodbye. Fix it, please.

Agreed. I need to get things in order and your thoughts(as well as those of others) are genuinely appreciated...

Coming off in 2 months for fertility teasons? A couple of lady friends? Whatever you're talking about, I hope you are not thinking of becoming a father any time this year.

Unfortunately, what you are doing is ensuring that something very, very bad must happen to you before you quit. Sometimes people hit a bottom when they lose a job or relationship, and that is enough. Other people have to hit a much lower bottom, like killing some kids in a drunk driving accident. That must be you.

GHB? No, AA.

1. Fuck no, I'm not sure as shit not planning on conceiving with any of the chicks I'm casually seeing. My reasons for temporarely coming off is for cryopreservation purposes.

2. I'm not an AA kind of guy.

I think being an addict/alcoholic might be a bit more to blame than loneliness my friend.

Absolutely, my addict mindset is practically almost entirely responsible for my dilemma. BUT, I feel that filling an emotional void would assist me in getting my shit together.