Hey Johnny, new guy (1.5 years) here so I’m not busting your balls/ovaries. Definitely read the past threads, bare minimum the past few weeks.
There’s a process. Just learn it a little bit. It’ll give you some peace of mind, and help you make reasonable decisions.
Having said that, also remember that we are otherwise sane people, taking chances by buying illegal or semi illegal substances, typically from overseas dealers. That’s what’s happening here.
You get fucked sometimes doing these things.
Are you getting fucked now? Probably not. But just take a breath, read for a few hours and chill out a bit. Otherwise, you’re going to get pounded on this forum and probably blocked by ‘Tracy’.