heres something I found on T-nation Dennis............
Your Doctor, Your Dealer
How to get what you want from your MD
by Cy Willson
Da man has what you need. He can hook you up with the good stuff no fakes, no counterfeits, no problem. His gear is always legit and of the highest quality. This cat is on the inside, my man, a true player. He even has the police in his pocket. That's right, you won't even have to worry about legal hassles dealing with this dude. Now, I'll tell you who he is, but you gotta' promise to play it cool, alright, G? The best dealer in town is? your doctor!
Whuz up, Doc?
The doctor's office. It's not our favorite place to be. It smells funny. The magazines are always from 1987. It's full of sick little rug rats and there's a funny stain on the floor. To top it off, the receptionists aren't even hot. And all this is just in the waiting room! Let's not even talk about what goes on behind closed doors groping and squeezing and that damned cold stethoscope! After you go through all of that, you get to hear a lecture about the dangerous effects of "new" supplements like creatine and ephedrine. Your doctor may even suggest you take up walking if you want to be really fit and healthy.
So why in the world would you actually want to go to the doctor's office? Well, not all doctors are behind the times or extremely close-minded. We can use these evolved doctors to our advantage in order to obtain drugs that we'd otherwise have to purchase on the black market or in some other way which is essentially illegal. What kind of gear can your get from your MD? How about Clomid, Nolvadex, anastrozole, and plain old Testosterone! Sounds like a sweet deal, huh?
In the following article, I'll show you:
? How to find one of these more open-minded doctors.
? What to say to them in order to ultimately obtain what you desire.
? How to fiddle with your body to fool the tests.
The search for Dr. Feelgood
Here's the easiest part. The first thing you need to do is find a phone book. Now go to the yellow pages and find "Physicians." Got it? Okay, now look for any doctors specializing in natural and alternative medicine and weight control. If you can find one specializing in anti-aging, you have rung the cherries. Now, decide what you want (within reason) and call and make an appointment.
Now, even the most open minded docs will still require you to have a hormonal profile evaluation on your blood before they'll consider T replacement. Don't worry though, with these more open minded doctors, your total and free T levels will have to be pretty high for them not to consider replacement. From my personal experience, my total Testosterone was around 700ng/dl while my free Testosterone was 183pg/ml. Even so, my doc gave me a 300mg injection of Testosterone enanthate to see if I noticed any improvements over the following week.
Obviously, every doctor has his or her own opinion on what's "normal". The great thing about the type of doctors we're looking for is that they're more open to helping us get to that high physiological range. This particular doctor wasn't satisfied unless I was at 1,100ng/dl or slightly higher. The only barrier was the insurance. You see, they typically require some lab documentation of "low" Testosterone. They want the lab results to show levels below normal in total and/or free Testosterone.
So, it was time to do some "monkeying," if you catch what I'm saying. Well, I did some tinkering around with my body and my next blood draw revealed a total T-level of 185 ng/dl and a free level of 14 pg/ml. Consequently, I walked out of the office with a legit script for Testosterone, while only paying five bucks for the therapy.
Now, most docs will give you a choice between Androgel or 200-300 mg/week injections. While not being super potent in terms of increasing LBM (like 500/mg a week), this amount would still allow you to reach the high range (if you aren't already hypogonadal).
So now I bet some of you guys want to know how to temporarily lower your T-levels so you can get some doctor prescribed Testosterone. I'll give you some tips at the end, but I'd like to first give you some other pointers.
Symptoms
When you meet with the doctor, he may ask you what symptoms you have or he may ask you some questions which will help him determine if you have a Testosterone deficiency. Tell the doctor the following or answer yes to any questions that pertain to these symptoms. You can give these symptoms in order to help convince the doc to write a script for any of the drugs listed.
? Lethargy
? Lack of sex drive (Not necessarily erections, but lack of sexual desire)
? Possible slight depression
? You gain fat easily
? Have a hard time gaining muscle despite increased calorie intake
? Can't get a good workout (Can't focus, have little drive, can't get a good pump etc.)
Monkeying with the blood test
In order to lower your Testosterone levels, you'll have to do some moderately drastic things. In fact, this will be a pain in the ass! Now, I realize that all this borders on the verge of excess, but hey, if you want it bad enough, you'll be willing to make some rather extreme sacrifices.
First, decrease calorie intake for about a week. If you can, don't eat 24 to 48 hours before the blood draw. When you do eat, eliminate carbs and fat. You'll only be eating protein during the week and preferably nothing the last 24 to 48 hours, except for a drink. The drink will be alcohol.
That's right, this will be the only time I'll actually recommend drinking, but it'll help. To be on the safe side, drink 3 to 5 beers (or equivalent in liquor) a day for 6 to10 days prior to the test. The night before the test, go ahead and have 6 or 7, or whatever it takes to get you drunk enough not to drive. About two hours prior to the test, have 3 to 4 beers.
Since this will all be on an empty stomach, you should have someone drive you to the office and back. Try not to grab the nurse's ass if you start to get tipsy and if there's a lamp in the office, try not to wear the shade as a hat while singing The Village People's "YMCA," accompanied by the appropriate hand motions.
As far as training, you'll be training twice a day including cardio for this entire week in order to raise cortisol levels. This will lower Testosterone as well. I'd also like you to get very little sleep. Around 3 to 4 hours per night and zero sleep the night before the big test. In other words, do everything ass-backwards!
You could also try a birth control pill. However, I don't have any first-hand experience with this method, so I can't say how well it'll work. If what you're trying to get is Arimidex (by displaying elevated estrogen levels), you could try the pill along with androstendione, although I probably wouldn't do it personally.
To really put yourself over the edge, try to watch as many reruns as possible of Designing Women on Lifetime. Your T levels are sure to plummet, unless you decide to kill yourself or become an interior decorator first. Seriously, you may also want to pick up some licorice root. Take around 3,000 mg a day for 6 to10 days until the test. I do, however, want to warn you that you'll need to get plenty of potassium in your diet, as licorice will lower potassium levels. Neglecting this aspect, especially if you're going to be drinking alcohol, too, can be dangerous.
All of these things combined should dramatically reduce your T-levels to the point where you'll qualify for replacement. Oh yeah, and try not to partake in any sexual activity. You'll probably be too fatigued to "bone" anyhow.
Conclusion
Hopefully I've convinced you that lying and deceit are always the way to go when it comes to healthcare. No, I'm only kidding! Seriously, not all doctors are brainwashed and close minded. You just have to look around to find the better ones. Remember to insist that it's your Testosterone levels causing the problems and that you'd like to try the given drug in order to solve the deficiency.
Be up-front about what it is you want from the doctor. Remember, they're there to serve you! Don't be scared about what they might say. What are they going to do? If by chance, the doctor doesn't agree to help you or at least work with you in some way, then it's time to move on. There are plenty of other doctors around. Now go out there and make me proud!
