MegaDaveMustang
Member
I know I have had interactions with a couple of members here regarding my health issues.
Long story short, in my twenties I was a very dedicated and (at the time) disciplined health conscious individual. I made bad choices, my own personal idiocy, fell in love with vodka for more than a decade and it literally almost ended my life three times in the same amount of years. No excuses, my own bullshit decisions.
That said, I've been busting my ass just to survive. I reached the point a while back to be prescribed TRT. Within that timeframe, I've had to go off and on my doses the last year due to hospitalizations and such. Ok.
My test levels are within normal range now, been off opioids for several months, out of the hospital admissions for several months. Back on TRT, 125mg split 2x weekly. I started slow with resistance bands, working back up.
2.5 years ago I was curling 90lbs 12 reps, benching 375 at 12-15, squatting 580, you get the idea, that is all averaging. I'm trying hard not to write a novel here.
So the last week or so after being cleared to lift more than 10lbs (which I have done in moderation before that) post gut surgery # 4, I struggle to curl a mere 15lbs...and this is quad anchored. I feel weak, feeble and it just depresses the fuck out of me.
Anyway I apologize, because I'm not really looking for answers; I know what needs done, what CAN be done given my situation. I'm just venting. But I'll take any words of encouragement I can get, I'm not ashamed to say.
To the potential detractors - piss off, I've heard it all before and your idiocy is equal to my past choices, as in, it means nothing now.
Thank you in advance to my sounding board, even if it amounts to just my own spewing forth to myself.
Long story short, in my twenties I was a very dedicated and (at the time) disciplined health conscious individual. I made bad choices, my own personal idiocy, fell in love with vodka for more than a decade and it literally almost ended my life three times in the same amount of years. No excuses, my own bullshit decisions.
That said, I've been busting my ass just to survive. I reached the point a while back to be prescribed TRT. Within that timeframe, I've had to go off and on my doses the last year due to hospitalizations and such. Ok.
My test levels are within normal range now, been off opioids for several months, out of the hospital admissions for several months. Back on TRT, 125mg split 2x weekly. I started slow with resistance bands, working back up.
2.5 years ago I was curling 90lbs 12 reps, benching 375 at 12-15, squatting 580, you get the idea, that is all averaging. I'm trying hard not to write a novel here.
So the last week or so after being cleared to lift more than 10lbs (which I have done in moderation before that) post gut surgery # 4, I struggle to curl a mere 15lbs...and this is quad anchored. I feel weak, feeble and it just depresses the fuck out of me.
Anyway I apologize, because I'm not really looking for answers; I know what needs done, what CAN be done given my situation. I'm just venting. But I'll take any words of encouragement I can get, I'm not ashamed to say.
To the potential detractors - piss off, I've heard it all before and your idiocy is equal to my past choices, as in, it means nothing now.
Thank you in advance to my sounding board, even if it amounts to just my own spewing forth to myself.
