Did Jesus even fucking lift?

[Sk8man101]

So some of you may already know I'm a pretty devoted Christian. I'm sure you guys ask this question to yourselves all the time, so I thought I'd give everyone a little clarification.

I got some proof here backed up by scripture that jesus did in fact fucking lift.

Exhibit A:

First look at this guy's beard right here^ I'll tell you right now there is no denying that this is the beard of a savage ass powerlifter. You see this guy walking around with some shit like this your already know this guy better be lifting 8 days a week if he's gunna be reppin a beard like that.

Exhibit B:
"After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”

So this one is pretty self explainitory, obviously Jesus was prepping for a show only forty days out, then some pussy ass Lucifur comes along trying to give Jesus a Double-Double with animal fries (sorry Canadians) and the big JC was all like fuck you bitch ass devil I'm watching my macros!
Savage shit right there.

Exhibit C:


Just look at this guy about to strike a double bicep before it was even cool. Fucking Judas was gettin all sneaking tryin to catch Jesus off guard during his off season. And what does Jesus do? He invites all of his bro's over to carbload (last supper) before the big show. That's some badass shit right there.

Exhibit D:
Last but not least the final shi-bang..

"The women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. 2They found the stone rolled away from the tomb" Luke 23

Keep in mind this was like a 4 ton fucking hunk of rock. Jesus look at that thing and was like "Fuck it, I don't need a spot" and rolled that shit all by himself.

In conclusion, Jesus did in fact fucking lift and not only that, he was one of the bests.
Get some!!

 

[insaiyan93]

Hahah this is hilarious

 

[joliver]

Second coming??

Or....

Jol is going to hell for blasphemy.

YOU DECIDE!!!

 

[gr8whitetrukker]

Jesus musta got so much pussy
Prolly the sexiest mangod to ever be crucified
Since theres was ONLY 1 i guess he wins by default

 

[joliver]

Jesus musta got so much pussy
Prolly the sexiest mangod to ever be crucified
Since theres was ONLY 1 i guess he wins by default

Imagine taking a woman on a date and she drinks a lot of water and you turn it into booze IN HER STOMACH. Shooting fish in a barrel.

 

[System7]

Jesus musta got so much pussy
Prolly the sexiest mangod to ever be crucified
Since theres was ONLY 1 i guess he wins by default

Winning @ life

 

[Sk8man101]

Jesus slayed the pussy you already know.
Bitches were washing his feet and shit, he was the King of Kings and God of Pimps.

Back then the benches at the church were all incline and the dumbbells all went up to 200lbs.

 

[Perrin Aybara]

dumbbells all went up to 200lbs.

They called those 8000 shekel dumbbells back then.

 

[Rockclimber]

Haha epic post! Another evidence exhibit: He almost sank his disciples ship with too much fish in the Sea of Galilee, get your protein brothers.

 

[ickyrica]

Better than the post is the survey at the top.

You may pick 1.Yes or 2.Yes

I picked yes.

 

[manafest]

As many storys that are told in thruout history and the ones in this thread would give and great argument if jesus ever even existed...Fact..Humans realized long ago we could tell far fetched things to our children to make them listen and far fetched things to make other adults have doubt and sway them ...

 

[gr8whitetrukker]

As many storys that are told in thruout history and the ones in this thread would give and great argument if jesus ever even existed...Fact..Humans realized long ago we could tell far fetched things to our children to make them listen and far fetched things to make other adults have doubt and sway them ...

Lol, ignorant shit here
Even in science the existence of Jesus is and has never been disputed. The question is.
Is he the son of god?

 

[Oregongearhead]

Actually the eternal question is : Did God create Man or did Man create God ?

 

[manafest]

Lol, ignorant shit here
Even in science the existence of Jesus is and has never been disputed. The question is.
Is he the son of god?

Ok not that you said Ignorant..There is actually NO scientific proof jesus walked the earth other then story told by people.. all cultures seem to have proof of their God or Gods that existed.. from indians to asian cultures.. And Most scholars agree that the only evidence that holds true to their argument is Having faith in jesus and the storys in the bible itself... you call that scientific proof? if you have faith and beleive the bible and use that as scientific proof then throw out all the real science the world has accomplished and proven without a doubt.. Dbol is proof.. take some...see what happens

 

[gr8whitetrukker]

Ok not that you said Ignorant..There is actually NO scientific proof jesus walked the earth other then story told by people.. all cultures seem to have proof of their God or Gods that existed.. from indians to asian cultures.. And Most scholars agree that the only evidence that holds true to their argument is Having faith in jesus and the storys in the bible itself... you call that scientific proof? if you have faith and beleive the bible and use that as scientific proof then throw out all the real science the world has accomplished and proven without a doubt.. Dbol is proof.. take some...see what happens

It has nothing to do with the bible
Jesus is a historical figure. And i have not seen one piece of literature, debate or excerpt that denies that. Not even among the hardest most devout scientists. So much so that even the time table scientists and historians use is A.D & B.C
Now why do you think that is?
Before Christ & After Death

I understand that there is the folks who do not believe and those that do. Really dont have a problem with any of that. But when you deny history you are wrong. Now whether he is the son of god...that IS the question

 

[oldmusclemike]

So some of you may already know I'm a pretty devoted Christian. I'm sure you guys ask this question to yourselves all the time, so I thought I'd give everyone a little clarification.

I got some proof here backed up by scripture that jesus did in fact fucking lift.

Exhibit A:
View attachment 68679
First look at this guy's beard right here^ I'll tell you right now there is no denying that this is the beard of a savage ass powerlifter. You see this guy walking around with some shit like this your already know this guy better be lifting 8 days a week if he's gunna be reppin a beard like that.

Exhibit B:
"After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”

So this one is pretty self explainitory, obviously Jesus was prepping for a show only forty days out, then some pussy ass Lucifur comes along trying to give Jesus a Double-Double with animal fries (sorry Canadians) and the big JC was all like fuck you bitch ass devil I'm watching my macros!
Savage shit right there.

Exhibit C:

View attachment 68680
Just look at this guy about to strike a double bicep before it was even cool. Fucking Judas was gettin all sneaking tryin to catch Jesus off guard during his off season. And what does Jesus do? He invites all of his bro's over to carbload (last supper) before the big show. That's some badass shit right there.

Exhibit D:
Last but not least the final shi-bang..

"The women took the spices they had prepared and went to the tomb. 2They found the stone rolled away from the tomb" Luke 23

Keep in mind this was like a 4 ton fucking hunk of rock. Jesus look at that thing and was like "Fuck it, I don't need a spot" and rolled that shit all by himself.

In conclusion, Jesus did in fact fucking lift and not only that, he was one of the bests.
Get some!!

Holy fuck a devoted Christian . This is blaspheme .... or something. I don't know but this thread is what I call STUPID, Just IMOP. Some stupid shit is entertaining, but "I" think this is so out of the realm of real it is a fucking waist of space.

really a devote Christian and you put Jesus in a sentence with a descriptive adjective , the word "FUCK"
If you are real yourself about you beliefs do you think Jesus would appreciate yu asking if he fucking lift. Now don't get YOUR panties in a wad I preempted my statements as IMOP...
But even if joking a bit crude and rude.

Oh by the way I'm no fucking prude and but also a strong Christian. Went to school in 2006-2009 , three years to become a certified n validated sanctioned Jail and Prison.
Chaplain.

I used to go into a few Jails n Prisons in North Central FL and give Bible studies. Just saying. For what ever. Ha n lol

 

[Jeremiahflex]

Hits blunt

Actually the eternal question is : Did God create Man or did Man create God ?

 

[Jeremiahflex]

It has nothing to do with the bible
Jesus is a historical figure. And i have not seen one piece of literature, debate or excerpt that denies that. Not even among the hardest most devout scientists. So much so that even the time table scientists and historians use is A.D & B.C
Now why do you think that is?
Before Christ & After Death

I understand that there is the folks who do not believe and those that do. Really dont have a problem with any of that. But when you deny history you are wrong. Now whether he is the son of god...that IS the question

How could the year 1 B.C. have been “before Christ” and A.D. 1 been “after death”? B.C. does stand for “before Christ.” A.D. actually stands for the Latin phrase anno domini, which means “in the year of our Lord.”

I personally knew BCE and BC but Didn't know what AD was

 

[gr8whitetrukker]

How could the year 1 B.C. have been “before Christ” and A.D. 1 been “after death”? B.C. does stand for “before Christ.” A.D. actually stands for the Latin phrase anno domini, which means “in the year of our Lord.”

I personally knew BCE and BC but Didn't know what AD was

I Had to look it up
I know its the official time table for TIME but didnt know all the story
Anno Domini - Wikipedia

 

[insaiyan93]

As many storys that are told in thruout history and the ones in this thread would give and great argument if jesus ever even existed...Fact..Humans realized long ago we could tell far fetched things to our children to make them listen and far fetched things to make other adults have doubt and sway them ...

Ok, look...i dont believe in that stuff either, but why come in here and get all serious over what was a pretty hilarious post? There is a religion thread for us to hack away at each others beliefs lol