Dealing with Body Dysmorphia

[RockyP]

Curious about others’ experience with BD. I dealt with it in my 20’s where I got all the way up to 275 at 10% bf. Now decades later I’m in the best shape I’ve been since I can remember, low 240’s and quite lean, not shredded by any means but that’s the 6-9 month goal. Getting compliments from everyone, friends, acquaintances, trainers at the gym etc. I’m def not depressed or anything. But in the past few days I look at my physique and am hyper focused on what I haven’t accomplished yet. All the improvements that need to be made. Totally discounting the progress to date. I thought I was past this but apparently not. Definitely not thinking of doing anything stupid like ramping up the gear or drastically cutting calories. But im curious how some of you who have been in the game for a long time manage this mind fucking.

 

[Nunya]

When I got down to stage lean, I looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize my face. It was disconcerting and not great to look at. I’m a woman and I just had no fat in my face. I looked gaunt and sharp. Ugh. Stage makeup helped but then I REALLY didn’t look like ‘me’.

Most of my life I looked one way. Now I look a LOT different. It’s all for good, but still disconcerting.

 

[Earthworm Jim]

The BD is new to me. I'm starting to look at really, really buff guys and doubt I'll be satisfied when I get to that shape. And I have a fear of losing the tren look. The thing that helps is reminding myself that we are really something that transcends the physical realm and it's a rite of passage to make the most of these meat suits that will all either and corrupt. And not trying to be cliche but I try to remember what matters more than how buff looking I can get on the outside....
1 Samuel 16:7 ESV
[7] But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

1 Samuel 16:7 (ESV) - But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do no | YouVersion

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but th

bible.com

 

[RockyP]

The BD is new to me. I'm starting to look at really, really buff guys and doubt I'll be satisfied when I get to that shape. And I have a fear of losing the tren look. The thing that helps is reminding myself that we are really something that transcends the physical realm and it's a rite of passage to make the most of these meat suits that will all either and corrupt. And not trying to be cliche but I try to remember what matters more than how buff looking I can get on the outside....
1 Samuel 16:7 ESV
[7] But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”

1 Samuel 16:7 (ESV) - But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do no | YouVersion

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but th

bible.com

Thank you for sharing that. Coming off tren is tough mentally, especially if you tolerate it well. That being said more and more people are competing without Tren, usng DHT’s like masteron and winstrol instead. The bottom line is that it’s hard to replicate the breadth and speed with which Tren produces aesthetic changes. But we need to get used to this.

 

[iCurlYaGirl10]

Some people fight it forever. Im not as big as I want but I always think im small and that complements from people are bullshit. My grandma has been trying to be skinny for many decades. She is literally 5 foot flat and like 85 lbs. And STILL thinks she's fat...... the mind is a big battlefield.

 

[BigDadd7]

I often look in the mirror and see either a fat turd, or a scrawny wimp. I never feel satisfied. To combat this, I take pictures every few weeks and compare them. I never trust the mirror- it's as bad as checking your hair in the Walmart self checkout camera.

 

[RockyP]

As I’ve gotten older the BD has actually gotten better for me. When my XXL t shirts start feeling loose I know it’s because I’m very lean, and the leaner you are the bigger you look. I’ve cut a good 50 lbs in the last 6-7 months and people at the gym keep asking how I got so “big”.

I also have proven to myself that it’s better to be leaner and able to run more gear than slightly fatter and “bigger.” My main focus these days is on health markers like labs, BP, and heart imaging / studies. I’m satisfied with how I look, I still want more, but I’m able to not obsess over it / let it consume me. That being said I definitely think about my current PED course multiple times per day and what the next one will be like, which syringes I’ll use (1 ml vs 3 ml), what the injection frequency will be, etc.

 

[Civdiv]

I often look in the mirror and see either a fat turd, or a scrawny wimp.

I fight the same problem. I have some loose skin from being a fat ass in the past. When I was cutting it didn't seem like any amount of progress made me feel happy with myself because the skin kept me from showing off how lean I was. When I got down to about 8%BF I had a mental battle to come off the gear and go into a health phase. I still felt like a fat ass. I filled back in from 195lb at 8% to around 210-215 at 9%(dexa). I honestly looked way better at 215 filled out but i felt like I was undoing all my hard work.

Now I see myself as too small and have been chomping at the bit to bulk up. It's all I can do to wait for my bloods to return to baseline to kick it off. I can logically see I'm bigger than everyone I know and get compliments consistently at the gym. But mentally I think I spend too much time comparing myself to 280lb monsters. I'm 5'11", 215 and under 10%. I'm not big by any means, but from what people tell me I'm definitely not small. I had a guy I don't even know at work approach me and ask for advice on how to get arms like mine. I still can't help but just feel underdeveloped and puny.

I honestly don't see myself ever being happy with my physique. Not because I want to improve, but because I compare myself to people who do this shit for a living. Just typing this shit out sounds dumb to me but I can't help it. Fucking body dysmorphia is definitely a real thing. I guess the positive side is that it's a great driver to keep grinding.

 

[Earthworm Jim]

I have one of those permanent belly distensions from being obese for 10 years that I didn't even know what a thing until ghoul posted all about it (go figure). But I love it. I feel like a little gorilla and when you see me doing ab exercises and holding at the top you're like oh, that's not flab, that's muscle

 

[Duck Dodgers]

I’m 30 years old now. I started officially “bodybuilding” when I was 25. Meaning using steroids and hiring a coach and all that. Around 26-27 I got really bad stretch marks that I was self-conscious about. On my chest, those bothered me for a while and of course I had some acne scars because I was ignorant of proper cycling and my first coach was definitely a dude bro. And it was my fault for not researching enough on a proper coach to hire that bothered me for a bit honestly.

But I’ve competed twice. My last competition was about a month ago. It was a journey, and I struggled a lot with the cystic acne part of it until I finally got a coach that understood how to help me and I also learned more about what I was doing to myself, so I take accountability for that.

Basically, when I wish that I don’t have the scars and stretch marks I just tell myself it’s a journey and that at the end of the day doesn’t make a whole lot of difference.

Would I make them disappear with a snap of fingers? Sure but everybody has flaws or perceived flaws. I should say that’s what makes us human. It makes us different.

What helps me is to realize that what makes me value myself is the kind of person I am and what I do. Again, it’s about the journey, not destination. And the journey is always bumpier than you think it will be. Bodybuilding is brutal on your body.

A lot of us who do bodybuilding need to be honest with ourselves. We definitely have a few screws if we’re willing to put our body through this much shit, which means that we’re generally harder on ourselves than most people ever will be on our physical appearance.

I sit back and allow myself to be proud of the progress that I’ve made, and remind myself that I’m living the life that I like to, and that helps me feel a lot more confident about myself.

 

[bossetti]

Curious about others’ experience with BD. I dealt with it in my 20’s where I got all the way up to 275 at 10% bf. Now decades later I’m in the best shape I’ve been since I can remember, low 240’s and quite lean, not shredded by any means but that’s the 6-9 month goal. Getting compliments from everyone, friends, acquaintances, trainers at the gym etc. I’m def not depressed or anything. But in the past few days I look at my physique and am hyper focused on what I haven’t accomplished yet. All the improvements that need to be made. Totally discounting the progress to date. I thought I was past this but apparently not. Definitely not thinking of doing anything stupid like ramping up the gear or drastically cutting calories. But im curious how some of you who have been in the game for a long time manage this mind fucking.

Man idk why when i see your PFP if i dont watch close i see this minecraft painting lmao

 

[Mfras]

I fight the same problem. I have some loose skin from being a fat ass in the past. When I was cutting it didn't seem like any amount of progress made me feel happy with myself because the skin kept me from showing off how lean I was. When I got down to about 8%BF I had a mental battle to come off the gear and go into a health phase. I still felt like a fat ass. I filled back in from 195lb at 8% to around 210-215 at 9%(dexa). I honestly looked way better at 215 filled out but i felt like I was undoing all my hard work.

Now I see myself as too small and have been chomping at the bit to bulk up. It's all I can do to wait for my bloods to return to baseline to kick it off. I can logically see I'm bigger than everyone I know and get compliments consistently at the gym. But mentally I think I spend too much time comparing myself to 280lb monsters. I'm 5'11", 215 and under 10%. I'm not big by any means, but from what people tell me I'm definitely not small. I had a guy I don't even know at work approach me and ask for advice on how to get arms like mine. I still can't help but just feel underdeveloped and puny.

I honestly don't see myself ever being happy with my physique. Not because I want to improve, but because I compare myself to people who do this shit for a living. Just typing this shit out sounds dumb to me but I can't help it. Fucking body dysmorphia is definitely a real thing. I guess the positive side is that it's a great driver to keep grinding.

I’m almost done (a few grinding slower months ahead) my first unfatting. Went from 355- 250 so far, and gained 20+ lbs of good meat over the past few years. I’m currently 16% on the dexa and still holding a little titty fat and lovehandles.

My original goal was 10% to see how uncomfortable it was and provide more runway for lean bulking but I’m realizing that despite being 6’ 3” 213 FFM that under 11% is gonna look worse than staying around 12% and letting skin tighten for a while. Don’t have a crazy dunlop apron but there’s some loose skin that flattens when I stretch. And there will be more. Adding to the lats & chest later this year will help fill back out and time staying lean will help I’m sure.

So my question for you is did you feel like cutting that peeled actually showed off the loose skin way more? Like you looked amazing in a tank top all striated and veiny but had to wear your pants above the horrible mess of loose skin, where slightly above 10% maybe still showed top 4 abs well and you had less melted candle in the middle?

 

[Civdiv]

I’m almost done (a few grinding slower months ahead) my first unfatting. Went from 355- 250 so far, and gained 20+ lbs of good meat over the past few years. I’m currently 16% on the dexa and still holding a little titty fat and lovehandles.

My original goal was 10% to see how uncomfortable it was and provide more runway for lean bulking but I’m realizing that despite being 6’ 3” 213 FFM that under 11% is gonna look worse than staying around 12% and letting skin tighten for a while. Don’t have a crazy dunlop apron but there’s some loose skin that flattens when I stretch. And there will be more. Adding to the lats & chest later this year will help fill back out and time staying lean will help I’m sure.

So my question for you is did you feel like cutting that peeled actually showed off the loose skin way more? Like you looked amazing in a tank top all striated and veiny but had to wear your pants above the horrible mess of loose skin, where slightly above 10% maybe still showed top 4 abs well and you had less melted candle in the middle?

The loose skin really just made me look like I was higher body fat. It kept my abs from showing through so my mid section just didn't look chiseled. Also a love handle like hang over of loose skin with tight pants, and if I bend over it drops like a melted garbage bag. When I filled back in and added 20lbs it definitely helped keep the skin from drooping as much. I think just standing there not bending there wasn't a huge difference in the skin between 8% and 10-12%. Mostly just impacted how lean I looked.

Even with the loose skin, the chest and shoulder striation looked good enough to make up for it when I got pretty lean.