gotta let out some frustration

[Spooby]

So my new job is okay, but the guy training me is a fucking prick and it's been getting worse over the past month.

I was hired to pick this fucker's brain, to ask him questions, to learn everything I can from him before he retires next year, so that I can take over management of a repair shop, which will be run solely by myself when that time comes.

I can't ask the guy a question without him giving some smart ass remark, or another question for my question.

He's rude as fuck all day and I feel like my every word and every move is being scrutinized (because they are)

I finally got sick of his shit in the truck a little bit ago and told him "look. I've been through a lot of shit recently, and I just want to make a living. That's all I'm here for. I'm here to learn from you, I am not here to constantly deal with you being an asshole. I have to ask you questions, and you need to do your job, which is teach me."

He then goes " I don't have to listen to this shit you sound like a girl" and gets out of the truck and mumbles a bunch of bullshit, so I went off on him.

He acts like a fucking child and he's almost 3 times my age.

I told a couple co-workers about it and he gets like that with them occasionally too, and they're old ladies! What an ass!

I'm stressed every day having to deal with his shit. It makes new nervous because I don't want to lose my job and the only way I know how to deal with people like him, I cannot do because this is work, not personal life.

If I attempt to speak with the owner aboutthis I think he'll get involved and it'll make the tension even worse.

The way things are going right now cannot sustain itself for an entire year. I'm not learning enough and I can't ask the questions I need to ask, etc...

Anyone have some suggestions?

 

[KingAlfred]

I don't know him but I'm guessing since he's retiring and he doesn't give a lot of fucks. Since you already told him what the deal is maybe you will have to tell the boss. My thinking is then he'll know what's going on and not blame you for not knowing as much as you should where if you don't tell him then he won't know what's going on and you could get blamed for shit. Especially if that prick goes to the boss first and says YOU'RE not being cooperative. You definitely don't want that so you need to make a preemptive strike. Get some other cooworkers who will agree that you have tried to get their opinion and went to them first so the boss knows you didn't just go right to him. I don't know how much of a chain of command there is there. Especially with that guy working there so long too he may be closer to the boss I don't know only speculating about that and going off personal experience. But tell the boss you don't want that guy knowing you went to him maybe. He has to know though because he's depending on you to be able to do you job competently so if this is keeping you from that then it would not be fair to him not to tell him.

 

[Spooby]

You're right.

the owner's son works here and I spoke to him briefly about this awhile back, I'm 99% sure he spoke with the owner about it because they began helping me learn a few things as well soon after I saw them in his office talking for awhile.

I just don't know a good time to go speak with him about it out what exactly to say. Asshole has been working here for a little over 10 years and is very two faced with the owner comes around

 

[Spooby]

This is also not the first time I've got into it with him. Few weeks ago, same thing.

 

[KingAlfred]

Yea doesn't seem like he's gonna change. Hang in there till that prick's gone. Hopefully your not stuck with him too long.

 

[Spooby]

About another 10 months :/ the other people I work with seem to be understanding when I explained what's going on to them so I think it'll be okay. I'm also thinking they said something to the owner because he was waiting on me to leave to talk to the guy in private in the shop.

Guess I'll see tomorrow.

I just don't get why people can't get along. There's no reason for him to have a shitty attitude with me. I did nothing to him. Oh well... but thanks man

 

[penche]

Do run Tren my friend. Do your best to get through it. Look at the long run and not the short suffer. This is for your future brother, whatever it takes to make a better living for you.

 

[TS561]

Just to represent a slightly different view. Going to the owner may back fire. You are being hired in a management position. So how you handle conflict resolution is important. Also, I believe you may have a huge advantage. If others are voicing concerns for the situation then you are really getting the best of both worlds. The conflict is being reported for you. If the owner were to bring it up to you. Then how you handle that interaction may be very important. You need him to have confidence in you as a leader. I really hope this works out for you.

 

[KingAlfred]

Just to represent a slightly different view. Going to the owner may back fire. You are being hired in a management position. So how you handle conflict resolution is important. Also, I believe you may have a huge advantage. If others are voicing concerns for the situation then you are really getting the best of both worlds. The conflict is being reported for you. If the owner were to bring it up to you. Then how you handle that interaction may be very important. You need him to have confidence in you as a leader. I really hope this works out for you.

Good point. Hmm but how to manage someone who is technically above you. Wouldn't life be much easier sometimes if you could just blast the prick in the face to let him know just what the score is?

 

[TS561]

Good point. Hmm but how to manage someone who is technically above you. Wouldn't life be much easier sometimes if you could just blast the prick in the face to let him know just what the score is?

That's where they have him in a really difficult situation. Because he is really someone meant to replace him, but he isn't replaced yet. So, yes, punching him in the face until he shits himself would be better, IMO. lol!

 

[Roger rabbit]

About another 10 months :/ the other people I work with seem to be understanding when I explained what's going on to them so I think it'll be okay. I'm also thinking they said something to the owner because he was waiting on me to leave to talk to the guy in private in the shop.

Guess I'll see tomorrow.

I just don't get why people can't get along. There's no reason for him to have a shitty attitude with me. I did nothing to him. Oh well... but thanks man

If I may weigh in.

You are correct I believe in it back firing if you go to the boss. Like you said you are hired to resolve problems and figure out solutions. You have done good by coming here and networking for ideas and one that I think would be beneficial would be is this,

Each week you need to set a goal of what you need to learn, this should be type on paper and organized with what the goals are etc to learn the new things. This paper should be turned into the boss, the boss son and the person teaching you. You will explain to all three at the end of the week you would like a quiz, and would like the " dick" who is suppose to teach you these things to sign off on the paper after he has taught you.

This solution does several things.

1. It shows initiative on your part and creativity.

2. It holds the dick accountable for teaching you the items you need to learn.

3. Shows organizational and professional skills. Also keeps documentation on the trainer and should hopefully help excel the training to get the dick out in a few months versus one year.

4. This will also, if you keep will create a training manual for the position with time frames to learn the information, and quizzes that one must pass. You could even present this to them as your ultimate goal so anyone in the future can learn this position.

Doesn't have to be this exact thing but something along this line will show what I have mentioned above.

Hope this helps.

 

[Roger rabbit]

Good point. Hmm but how to manage someone who is technically above you. Wouldn't life be much easier sometimes if you could just blast the prick in the face to let him know just what the score is?

In business we call this managing up.

There are three ways that all managers should manage.

1. Manage up.
2. Manage parallel
3. Manage down.

Managing up take some skill as you have to figure out what makes them tick. This takes observation skill on what they do and don't like and you have to play off the likes. Or also called the "buy in" you make the person think it's their idea by planting the " seed" then you get them to do what you want them to do, by them thinking they thought of it. The "ego" is what you have to figure out typically and message it.

2. Managing parallel is the hardest of them all. Managing a person directly equal in rank is always a tough one and should be danced on carefully. Best practice for this is to develop a give and take relationship with open communication. Very challenging.


3. Managing down- this is normally the easy one. Due to "power of position"

Sorry for my long rant. Business and managing is my thing. Was a vp of a company for a while and now enjoy owning my own.

Feel free to pm me if you need any more help/guidance.

 

[Spooby]

@Roger rabbit

Hey bro, thank you, I read your PM.

Today he's being much less of a miserable prick.

I do sympathise with him, somewhat.

He's old, he's been to war (navy-Vietnam), he's got some "kid" (me) and I say that relatively because of the age difference... coming into "his shop" and trying to call the shots and ask questions, making a few changes to make myself comfortable for when he leaves... but that's just how it is. I was hired to do exactly what I'm doing, so he can't blame me and take whatever anger he has about it on me. Furthermore he has no reason to be the way he is.

He's had a long life, I can't begin to imagine how many times his perspective has changed over the years and all that he knows.

The thing is, I don't much believe that is of any importance in this work environment. We're both here to make a living and that's that. No need for drama. I said that very clearly. I don't care if we have personality conflicts. You don't need to necessarily like the person you work with. You're only hereto get a job done, regardless.

I try to be friendly and get to know him but he's an ass, so I don't see any resolution, he prevents that. So I'll be apain in his ass til he leaves.

Tough. Lol

 

[Brandaddy]

There are really only two things you can do. Establish your dominance towards him and put him in his place and risk losing your job. Or, go tell whoever is above him, and be labeled as the company snitch.

 

[Spooby]

Eh.. I think he's a spoiled bitch. That's his problem. he intimidated others who he works with and no one has said anything back to him until now, so he's throwing a bitch fit about it.

He hasn't said much to me today, so we'll see how this plays out

 

[movingiron88]

My opinion is you just got to be the bigger man and deal with it. Don't let him make you feel uncomfortable period. Own that shit, walk in there every day with your head up and chest out. It's work, you are not going to get along with everybody and it sucks sometimes. But everytime something like that happens I think about my wife and kids at home that I am supporting. I would kill for them, so I can deal with a jerkoff because if not, my family doesn't eat. Don't be an asshole, just handle it.