Satisfaction or regret about started using PEDs?

[19nor]

Hi everyone.
First of all, English is not my first language, so excuse me in advance for any mistake I could make.
I'm here to gather some feeds from you about the choice to start seriously cycling/being on PEDs (mainly AAS).
Till now I've run 4 cycles in 10 years, the first one DBol only (knowing not that much about how to do things the best way), TestE + Win (the latter as a starter and while washing out from T), Test + NPP and Test + Mast E, the last one in 2019. Never had significant issues, always used moderate doses (max TE 500 mg/week)
I waited quite long time from cycle to cycle, mainly because of social anxiety (let me pass the term), wanting people around me not to bother given that it was quite visible.
I'm aware of pros and cons about AAS use, sides effects in the short and long run, but the idea of being on is still there and I've come to the conclusion that maybe is better to "take the risk" and join the journey than being there always thinking about it.
I'm not a professional bodybuilder, nor I'm interested in becoming that, just like the way I look and the feeling I've been on while using AAS.
I've tried to distract myself with new hobbies or focusing on work (that is quite time consuming in the end), but the idea is still right there, despite life as far as now is going quite well and being satisfactory.
In your experience is it worth it in the end?
My real fear is to regret in future about my choice, knowing that it's kind of an anticipatory anxiety. What do you think?
Thanks for every possible input about it

 

[johnthebigguy]

My Dear friend I was in the mindset when I First started my journey,now I blast and cruise last 3 years and I have done 4 cycles also.
My humble opinion after 3 years is if you can focus your life and do it everything right and with the right protocols,gear can make your life much much better.

 

[Ghoul]

You are unlikely to find many "regretters" on this forum. Selection bias means the overwhelming majority here will be positive.

That said. I have rarely heard regrets except from those who've developed serious problems after a long period. Best to look to youtube interviews with bodybuilders at the end of their careers for a candid look at regrets.

 

[Mac11wildcat]

I wish I’d never started. I tell everyone I wish I’d been successful at something else.

But I also have zero regrets about the path it’s led me down bodybuilding wise and the individuals I’ve met, discipline I’ve formed, etc.

 

[bigboy420]

I was low testosterone. Would never go back to that life.

Testosterone is truelly my holly grail.

 

[rjm261]

I agree. While it may not be for everyone, it can really change your life in a positive way if used correctly.

 

[19nor]

I wish I’d never started. I tell everyone I wish I’d been successful at something else.

But I also have zero regrets about the path it’s led me down bodybuilding wise and the individuals I’ve met, discipline I’ve formed, etc.

Would you mind to explain why in the end you wish that?
Thanks everyone for the feeds

 

[19nor]

You are unlikely to find many "regretters" on this forum. Selection bias means the overwhelming majority here will be positive.

That said. I have rarely heard regrets except from those who've developed serious problems after a long period. Best to look to youtube interviews with bodybuilders at the end of their careers for a candid look at regrets.

I agree with you, surely asking that question here is inevitably prone to a bias, but my intention was to have feeds from common folks who are/have been on, I'm not that much interested in professional bodybuilders experience (hope it doesn't sound like I'm a dickhead/asshole) just because it's not the path I want to follow, in terms of how much gear to use, kind of gear used and ambition to compete.
Appreciate your feed mate

 

[Mac11wildcat]

Would you mind to explain why in the end you wish that?
Thanks everyone for the feeds

I come from an athletic background and would’ve always preferred success in track or soccer over this. I am well aware of the health challenges this may pose down the road.

In the end though this is fulfilling a major part of my life in being a competitive endeavor which is something I value/need in my life. As much of a downside as there can be to this in regards to social/family life and overall health it also has rubbed off on my wife and son and they eat and remain healthier than 99% of people. I’m proud of that.

I wouldn’t call it regret. But would not have argued with a different path. Now that I’m here though, it’s what I am.

It’s a complex discussion and I’m poorly articulating it.

 

[Mac11wildcat]

I agree with you, surely asking that question here is inevitably prone to a bias, but my intention was to have feeds from common folks who are/have been on, I'm not that much interested in professional bodybuilders experience (hope it doesn't sound like I'm a dickhead/asshole) just because it's not the path I want to follow, in terms of how much gear to use, kind of gear used and ambition to compete.
Appreciate your feed mate

For reference I am a pro bodybuilder, so maybe you don’t care for my take.

 

[bigboy420]

overall health

Can you explain less words more gymbro like?
Liver, kidney bye bye? Or whats the summery?

Why was it not worth? I truelly dont understand your answer.

 

[Mac11wildcat]

Can you explain less words more gymbro like?
Liver, kidney bye bye? Or whats the summery?

Why was it not worth? I truelly dont understand your answer.

Well I’m not done yet. So I can’t answer “worth it” completely but so far I would say my journey as been “worth it” I’m just aware of the possibility down the road heart/liver/kidney/joints. And my major point is if I had a choice between pro bodybuilding or pro at something I’d previously done like track or soccer I’d choose the later.

 

[Ghoul]

Well I’m not done yet. So I can’t answer “worth it” completely but so far I would say my journey as been “worth it” I’m just aware of the possibility down the road heart/liver/kidney/joints. And my major point is if I had a choice between pro bodybuilding or pro at something I’d previously done like track or soccer I’d choose the later.

Clearly someone who understands the potential of negative outcomes at the end of this road vs other sports. We're usually blind to long term health outcomes in part because who wants to think of an "old" version of themselves, but it starts to come into focus when the first undeniable sign of human decay confronts us. For me, it was the loss of an adult tooth, lol. That was way more traumatic than I would've expected lol (get an implant, it's better then a real tooth).

The good news is unlike the BBs that came before, you had a ton of info to help with harm reduction and avoided a lot of the mistakes the pioneers made. Couple that with the amazing medical tech available now you have a great chance of dodging the worst of the impacts from AAS abuse. Nobody could get a calcium score 30 years ago, until their autopsy.

And plenty of ex soccer players and runners with trashed knees wishing they could move without pain regretting their choices too, while the sedentary end up with the worst regrets of all.

It's pick your poison in this life. With a clear focus on taking care of yourself from here on out, a decision made while you're still breathing and functional, there's no need to regret anything brother.

 

[goodstuffbro]

Regrets? Not discovering that before. Would've made my 20s much better.

 

[Nidus]

Chronically had low T, was also obese and had no drive, couldnt see colours of life really. Was always frustrated and kinda depressed (runs big in family)

Decided to get in touch with a doctor, got me on TRT and started at 125mgs a week, everything improved and over the last two years i tampered it up to 250mg and added in a bit of primo. Lost 40Kgs, improved my lifestyle and became a different person and had so many positive changes

i never want to go back and cant imagine not taking test, for me the 250mgs a week is a lifetime commitment

 

[19nor]

I come from an athletic background and would’ve always preferred success in track or soccer over this. I am well aware of the health challenges this may pose down the road.

In the end though this is fulfilling a major part of my life in being a competitive endeavor which is something I value/need in my life. As much of a downside as there can be to this in regards to social/family life and overall health it also has rubbed off on my wife and son and they eat and remain healthier than 99% of people. I’m proud of that.

I wouldn’t call it regret. But would not have argued with a different path. Now that I’m here though, it’s what I am.

It’s a complex discussion and I’m poorly articulating it.

Surely complex, but you gave me some good insight and food for thoughts.
I've tried to train, eat and supplementing in order to see what I could achieve, but I figured out it's not my path.
Thanks mate

 

[19nor]

For reference I am a pro bodybuilder, so maybe you don’t care for my take.

At all, it was not my intention to denigrate, as stared above it's not something I aspire to, I've not the right mentality and was dealing not that well while trying to see if I could make a commitment to bodybuilding.
Never thought about "I don't care what a bodybuilder could say", every insight is useful.
Sorry if I didn't express myself well, didn't want to seem an asshole

 

[lukiss96]

Somewhere in between. It's an interesting and awesome journey which brought me one of the best moments of my life (yet) and of course really bad ones too. I don't want to go too much in to the details.

I used to blast and love it, now I cruise/trt most of the time and love it even more. I learned to appreciate high, but not super high Testosterone levels. Something like 1000ng/dl which is more than a natural can have in the real world without causing any problems at least for now.

There are some advantages and of course disadvantages when compared to myself natural (here I mean trt/cruise):

Advantages:
+Easy to retain muscle and strength on a cut.
+Sex drive is amazing
+Feeling enhanced
+Not worrying about factors such as less sleep or other rough times which affect T negatively for a natural
+Harder and fuller look than natural
+Bigger, leaner and stronger

Disadvantages:
-Even though I feel damn good on synthetic T, I still felt my best when I was natural
-Issues with BP and estrogen, rbc, hematocrit/hemoglobin (which is now controlled)
-Feeling dependent on Testosterone injections and AI
-Sometimes mood swings, mainly due to hormonal imbalances (as perfect as someones says they have it, no. A natural can have it balanced. We do need to balance it ourselves)
-Sometimes feeling like I would be better off if I come off (hard to say, but I have tried thrice now and I don't feel the same as before, so I guess natural life ain't for me anymore)

 

[Pinnacle Elements]

Well I’m not done yet. So I can’t answer “worth it” completely but so far I would say my journey as been “worth it” I’m just aware of the possibility down the road heart/liver/kidney/joints. And my major point is if I had a choice between pro bodybuilding or pro at something I’d previously done like track or soccer I’d choose the later.

Honest question, I’m really not trying to come off as rude- if there were larger amounts of money associated with the sport would your viewpoint change?

 

[Mac11wildcat]

Honest question, I’m really not trying to come off as rude- if there were larger amounts of money associated with the sport would your viewpoint change?

Likely no. The money I don’t make is because I’m not built for this social media shit. There’s plenty on money to be made.

I’m just aware of the toll this takes and that as safe as I am I’m here to compete at as high a level as I can for as long as I can stay competitively.