Sorry
Batista,
Sorry to hear about your Sis....keep tough.
As for your wife, is it just in times when you feel "down" that you notice her really picking on you? I found that in my marriage. Anytime I was sick, had a problem I needed support with, etc my wife would seem to just try and kick me further into the hole. I went to a therapist about it, and came back with an interesting persepective on it...
Basically a lot of us men go for girls that are looking for Hero's. We want to be there knight in shining armor, and that is what they want. Most of these girls had a huge amount of respect for their fathers as well. Anyway, that is all well and good until we start showing some weakness. Then, it isn't that they don't still love us, it is just they start to get real worried about us.....if we get sick, they get mad and worried we might die (even if it is just a cold)....if we get worried, they see us starting to crumble. It isn't even something they are aware of, it is much deeper than that. Basically anything we have that goes wrong in our life they subconsiously see as much bigger and much worse, and that it somehow relates to their losing their hero....which makes them feel scared, alone, and vulnerable. If their dad is dead or separated from the family supposedly that makes it about 10x as bad.
Batista, I don't know if that makes any sense in your situation. Maybe the age thing amplifies the hero status you hold. Maybe I am so far off the mark I sound like a rambling fool. However, if she is really at her worst when you think you need her most, I would guess this is probably what is going on. Assure her you love her and will always be there for her.....and look at it this way: The "fallen hero" complex is just another distorted way they are really trying showing their love.
Hope this helps.......
Kemo
