What you are doing right now is text book projecting. You are fighting yourself because you don't want to admit to yourself that you are insecure. We all are. It's a steroid forum.
Yes, and that argument is valid. We project our internal image on our exterior.
Yes, you enjoy metal when you are angry. Your other music choices are directly linked to stages in your life. Heavy blues was a rough time for you. Somebody died.
It is our mental image that we project onto our environment. It sounds too simple but it is. It isn't odd. You pride yourself in your work and you are a top performer at work. People know you do good work.
Bi-polar? No. If you cannot confirm whatever syndrome they want to diagnose you with by bloodtest. IT IS BULLSHIT!
Okay.
1. We rock it between 90-105 with 70-80% humidity or better all summer. I also refuse to run A/C and opt for simple window fans. What, exactly, would you be wearing up here?
I suppose it's all about showing off the bod, right? Here's the thing though, I look infinitely better in a t-shirt or button down. So if that's the end game, why the fuck am I rocking $10 Walmart tanks?
I'm not and will never be the chiseled guy with washboard anything.
2. Do I pride myself on my work? It's a fucking transaction. I'm sitting here now bullshitting online and watching a movie. Contemplating busting out the Gameboy and blasting some Pokemon.
I haven't worn 'office' attire or adhered to a dress code in my life. I'm actually wearing a beater, zip up, and fucking unicorn pajama pants.
If something should need dealt with, I'll deal with it. I'll be paid for it. Beyond that? I really dont give a fuck or feel the need to endure any personal discomfort just to meet someone's expectation that I wear what? Khakis and a polo?
Nah man.
Is my office a cluster fuck? No.
I don't need reference materials because I remember everything from cross dock locations to my driver's phone numbers and the gate codes for all of our yards. If theres a DOT reg I need to double check, it's at the tip of my fingers.
I digitized my reports and all of my rate cons. Because its convenient and I'm not a fan of unnecessary effort.
My office isn't plastered with shit because it would serve no purpose. It's not filthy because we have a cleaning crew on payroll. Not that they have much to do but vacuum.
I also work alone in the office 95% of the time unless they need coverage during business hours. Ya'know what? I dont do a thing differently then either though.
3. Lemme take a look at the randomness that I had on the drive into the office here...
The Bouncing Souls
Tyler Kip & The Flips
Flogging Molly
La Butcherettes
Tito and Tarantula
Living Colour
Pink
Henry Rollins & Mother Superior
Crystal Faerie
That's quite the emotional roller coaster. But it's also possible that, maybe, sometimes, a cigar is just a cigar.
By the way, the last thing I want to listen to when I'm angry is metal. Its, honestly, probably the genre that gets the least spin because so much of it is self serious schlock and boring as fuck.
But I like really bad movies everynow and then too.