Personal log from first cycle

had hospital check today, planned.
my kcal's are off cause for 5 hours i had to be with empty stomach cause blood draws at 3 places. im hungry af tbh.

nurses were happy with my veins, as always.
last check was with my dermathologist, i walked into her ambulance in hoodie

"hi, long time no see, how are you doin? everything ok?"

"hi, i wont lie to you, absolutly fckin amazing"

"yea sit dont then. did you gain weight? you look bigger in your face"

"yea im 95kg, im overeating, getting fat..."

i took down hoodie for blood to be drawn by nurse, dr looks at me with weird look

"you dont look fatter, you look bigger"

"yea im eating and eating"

they draw blood, i told them that im lacking 2-3l of water compared to my normal day. asked what will they check, blood panel, lipids, liver, kidney and some stuff cause of humira.

it was quite funny, this dr is super nice and we always have good talk but i think she connected 1+1 and saw whats happening.

good thing is that they will do bloodwork for me, paid by insurance. they will call if something will be off so will see. i suspect they will call for sure.

asked them to measure my BP, 125/55 and pulse was 52. i expected worse probably.

anyway, im gonna eat something and head to other hospital with lab for T & E blood test. i had shot of test 250mg yesterday, togeather with 1/4 of aromasin pill. im bit tight on time last few weeks so i have to do it today, at least i should be around peak values of test i think?
 
i have to say, i really enjoy legs. its different kind of pain and experience than upper body. its like i can concentrate all my inner demons and pain and mental shit into that training. different kind of feeling after.

anyway after squats i did more "pump like" sets and after ass and calves. i need to walk this weekend :D

anyway im super happy with squat today. it was harder to put myself under bar than actually do squat with it.
 
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I just got uncomplete blood test back, friends mom works here and called me with "idk what are you doin but i suggest you stop that"...

Kidney and liver is without issues, lipids are trashed, ive found cap on testosterone test, im above 3000ng/dl.

Anyway:
HDL: 0,91nmol/l or 35.19 mg/dl
LDL: 4.66nmol/l or 180.2mg/dl
Serum triglycerides: 1.5nmol/l or 132.86mg/dl - this is in range on their scale, as im under 1.82, not sure if its concerning

Hormones:
Testosterone: above 3000ng/dl, couldmt measure
Free T and free E couldnt be calculated
Estradiol: 191.9 pmol/l or 52 pg/ml
SHBG: 9.9 nmol/l - not sure which units are commonlly used in Us or this forum.

Anyway, blood was drawn thuesday midday.
Protocol now is 250mg or 1ml of test c monday and thursday, 1/4 of aromasin pill M/W/F. For about week im on 50mg/day of proviron cause of libido effects and my curiosity. It works but i will stop that now.

So, my peak test values are stupid, ofc. estrogen is okay i would say? I feel good, no excesive water retention or any sides related to it.

Im not sure tbh if i added complete blood count to the test or not, i may have been dumo enough to not cross that... But i will have it back from my dermathologist, she will probably freak out also.

Anyway, i think its time to wrap it up for this time, this is 12th week of this blast, 8 or 9 with 500mg/weekly.
Im +16kg, not much fatter, everything went smoothly (except for lipids), learned some things, now i know i have good reaction from test, no alarming sides. I think i wont be gready and wont push it to 20 weeks, maybe i could go for +20kg weight increase possibly but i dont think thats smart or needed.

If anyone else thinks its better to push to 16 weeks and try to gain additional kg's, let me know. Im happy about results so far...

Cruise dose will start at 200 and i will retest after 4-5 weeks to see where im.
Probably will try to maintain for 4 weeks and then cut, im very tempted to try low dose test + mast, something like 200+200 weekly.
Will see...
 
I just got uncomplete blood test back, friends mom works here and called me with "idk what are you doin but i suggest you stop that"...

Kidney and liver is without issues, lipids are trashed, ive found cap on testosterone test, im above 3000ng/dl.

Anyway:
HDL: 0,91nmol/l or 35.19 mg/dl
LDL: 4.66nmol/l or 180.2mg/dl
Serum triglycerides: 1.5nmol/l or 132.86mg/dl - this is in range on their scale, as im under 1.82, not sure if its concerning

Hormones:
Testosterone: above 3000ng/dl, couldmt measure
Free T and free E couldnt be calculated
Estradiol: 191.9 pmol/l or 52 pg/ml
SHBG: 9.9 nmol/l - not sure which units are commonlly used in Us or this forum.

Anyway, blood was drawn thuesday midday.
Protocol now is 250mg or 1ml of test c monday and thursday, 1/4 of aromasin pill M/W/F. For about week im on 50mg/day of proviron cause of libido effects and my curiosity. It works but i will stop that now.

So, my peak test values are stupid, ofc. estrogen is okay i would say? I feel good, no excesive water retention or any sides related to it.

Im not sure tbh if i added complete blood count to the test or not, i may have been dumo enough to not cross that... But i will have it back from my dermathologist, she will probably freak out also.

Anyway, i think its time to wrap it up for this time, this is 12th week of this blast, 8 or 9 with 500mg/weekly.
Im +16kg, not much fatter, everything went smoothly (except for lipids), learned some things, now i know i have good reaction from test, no alarming sides. I think i wont be gready and wont push it to 20 weeks, maybe i could go for +20kg weight increase possibly but i dont think thats smart or needed.

If anyone else thinks its better to push to 16 weeks and try to gain additional kg's, let me know. Im happy about results so far...

Cruise dose will start at 200 and i will retest after 4-5 weeks to see where im.
Probably will try to maintain for 4 weeks and then cut, im very tempted to try low dose test + mast, something like 200+200 weekly.
Will see...

Low SHBG and very high triglycerides are both indicators for Fatty Liver and/or Insulin resistance creeping up. Whats your Homa and hba1c?

You should look into getting some Ezemtib and Bempoic Acid with those lipids. Also check out LipoA and ApoB
 
Low SHBG and very high triglycerides are both indicators for Fatty Liver and/or Insulin resistance creeping up. Whats your Homa and hba1c?

You should look into getting some Ezemtib and Bempoic Acid with those lipids. Also check out LipoA and ApoB
low shbg will be cause of proviron probably?

anyway, im waiting for email with rest, will update.
 
low shbg will be cause of proviron probably?

anyway, im waiting for email with rest, will update.
Depends on your current stack and dosing but low SHBG is a key indicator for NAFD and potentially some glucose issues.

I like having low SHBG myself but be aware that it can also be just an indicator, something to keep in mind in general
 
Depends on your current stack and dosing but low SHBG is a key indicator for NAFD and potentially some glucose issues.

I like having low SHBG myself but be aware that it can also be just an indicator, something to keep in mind in general
50mg/day for week i think?

wont be using it anymore, wanted to test it for boners, it works, maybe too good.

before proviron, on 300mg/week of test it was 16.4 nmol/l.
 
50mg/day for week i think?

wont be using it anymore, wanted to test it for boners, it works, maybe too good.

before proviron, on 300mg/week of test it was 16.4 nmol/l.
Proviron works extremely well, not just for boners. When using it, it pushes down my SHBG to 5-8 within 2 weeks of use. from 18-20.
 
Proviron works extremely well, not just for boners. When using it, it pushes down my SHBG to 5-8 within 2 weeks of use. from 18-20.
yea it was not needed experiment on my part. it works, good to know.

anyway, im not sure if i should go to cruise by next week or push it to 16 weeks.
 
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Lipids are trashed for sure. Not sure how had is rest?
My dumb ass forgot to add blood count... I will have that from my Dr, she will probably freak out...
 
long time no post... ive been lazy updating this.

anyway, i pushed bulk to 16 weeks, ended up +16kgs of weight but far too fat.

so naturally, i decided to start a cut. lowered test to 300, added 300 mast e, that was almost 13 weeks ago.

today is end of week 12 if cut, so far im down -18kg and it opened my eyes how fat i was. i HEAVILY underestimated fat level.

anabolics were 300/300 test mast, then i increasted it to 300/360 test/mast cause i was greedy and couldnt felt empty space in syringes so +60mg of mast per week.

between all this i used oxandrolone at 50mg/day, mostly on workout days, i love that compound.

rn im on 300 test, 500 mast and from this week on 50mg oxandrolone ed. i will push cut until end of august to be as lean as possible.

rn im under 15% bf i think. visible abs, side abs a bit, separated quad muscles, separation between bicep/tricep, some stradation on delts when flexed, back much leaner, new veins on abs, lats, forearms are spiderwebs especially during trainin, few veins on them already popped out. still dont have bicep vein on left arm but whatever...

overall im leanest ive ever been during my adult life, looking best also.

ive had small-ish injury on bike, i hit ground and injured my right elbow, for 12 days i was out of gym routine which sucked. up
until that point i was still progressing in weight/reps even in deficit but elbow stopped me.

got back to gym but i was still limited, especially on push momevemnts, whole arm was colorfull and bruised, tricep was super weak. but its 90% okay. elbow was bleeding blood and some unknown fluid for 3 days, my mobility at that elbow was fcked.

anyway, im back at trainin 5-6 days per week + regular cardio on my bike 3-5x per week for 1-2 hours, depending on energy levels. im on super low kcals, on 5mg tirz which is wonderfull addition to cut.

but all drugs cant overcome fatigue and lack of energy cause of big deficit. my mood is/was shit, libido gone, lifting capacity is down also and i have to use liquid carbs during workouts.

overall im super happy with progress, even with aggressive approach to it but thats me.
 
i did another bloodwork at start of june i think. i expected that it will be hard stop to this (perma)blast im doin but i was plesently surprised.

no thick blood, liver values untouched despite oxandrolone, ldl is down and improbed, hdl is fucked as expected, estrogen under control. even with mast added, i have 0 issues with estorgen, no low sides.
 

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i did another bloodwork at start of june i think. i expected that it will be hard stop to this (perma)blast im doin but i was plesently surprised.

no thick blood, liver values untouched despite oxandrolone, ldl is down and improbed, hdl is fucked as expected, estrogen under control. even with mast added, i have 0 issues with estorgen, no low sides.
Would keep an eye open for that Homa and Tryg. but not so bad after all! Are you running Glutathione or anything for lipids? Ezemtibe and bempoic acid would greatly help!
 
about drugs and plans:

so, rn im on 300 test c, 500 mast e and 50 oxandrolone daily. bit overkill and abuse but im avare of that, i wanna experiment.

so, test, 0 issues there.

mast e is new one, so far i have bit mixed feelings. i upped dose 2-3 weeks ago to 500 to see if its worth running again.
so far, i cant tell anything bad against it.
vascularity is up, new veins on weird places but im also leaner. no crazy libido but again, in in deep deficit. when i upped kcals few times for day or two it was back and every chick was fuckable. bit of mood bump for sure, i think i feel more aggressive inside and better in gym. pumps, even on very low carbs and low sodium are good, again, veins all over when working out.

no noticable sides. i was battling with some shoulder/back acne but nothing too bad, i have topical/water antibiotics from my dermathologist and its 90% gone now.

i guess i expected more. will see what will happed in next 7 weeks of this cut, if it will trully shine at low bf%.
i have plenty left and it would be sad if nothing magical happens...

about oxandrolone... where to start... i love it.
dosed always at 50mg 2-3h before workout.
strenght is up even during cut, aggression im gym is up, better mind muscle connextion, vascularity is up which is super nice, overall hardness togeather with mast in incredible. its almost like 24/7 pump, even on low carbs.

again, 0 negative accute sides. liver dmg on bloodwork is almost none i would say, vslues are all good. im almost 4,5 years sober from alcohol or drugs so that probably helps.
after 3-4 weeks i could feel stomach a bit but nothing major i think.

i wanna run it until end of cut, im very interested how will i look with mast + onxadrolone at low bf%.

so far, i really like it, it would be great if i could run it year round... pity


aand lastly, tirz.
brutalľy effective compound without any noticable sides. magic in vial. not expensive to run.
for 6-7 weeks i was at 2,5mg every 5 days which almost killed 100% of my appetite. 0 food noise, 0 snacking, 0 sides.
then i increased to 5mg, again, appetite gone and 0 sides.

yesterday i had second cheat day, after 5 weeks and i couldnt even finish my meal (homemade pizza with 4 cheeses, chicken, ham). after that i pinned 7,5mg to push until end of cut.

again. miracle drug for cutting. i understand that many people in this comunity will be against using these drugs to make cutting easier, that i have to have willpower on my own and blabla other stuff.
my thinking is that i threw away natty card and i will use drug A to get to goal A.
it makes sense to use massinf compound during growth phase to help build muscle, recover faster etc and same sense i will be using drug to help me get leaner easier.

also, i have bussiness to run with guys working for me and tirz made me mentally good enough during cut.
im not most pleasent guy to be around rn but thats expected and its much better than natural process.

so, overall, im (ab)using multiple drugs and speedrunning through maraton to get to
my goal. so far, no
negative experiences expect that bit of acne.
 
Would keep an eye open for that Homa and Tryg. but not so bad after all! Are you running Glutathione or anything for lipids? Ezemtibe and bempoic acid would greatly help!

10mg of rosuvastatin eod since start of cut i think. 0 sides from it, ldl is down quite nicely.

i would like to keep running low dose glp1 for health benefits year round but im not sure, i dont wanna impact my appettite. 2,5mg starting dose killed it. i will try maybe 1-1,5mg every 7 days and will see. or i will give reta a try.
 
plans for future:

end of cut is set at 31. august, i wanna go for 4-5 day trip to sea with friend and look good. he is also cutting, around/under 10% bf first time im his life and looking crisspy.

after that, plan is to cruise at 200mg test until early/mid november, during this time i will slowly increase kcals to reset and build back my metabolism. goal will be to not gain fat. i wanna titrate tirz dose down slowly and add kcals also slowly. will see how it will go. i wanna improve lipids a bit, will try niacin for hdl.

during november i wanna start neyt growth phase and focus on chest, core, hamstrings and lower traps especially. but overall i need bit more mass.

plan is to grow for 5-6 months and not get fat.

anabolics, it will be test only. im not sure what i wanna do...

option 1 is to go for 500mg test/week again and milk it for whole time. i know my ai dose, i had good time on it, overall happy, horny, strong, bloated a bit but thats expected.

option 2 is to ramp it up, something like 200-400-600-750 slowly. not sure if thats good or bad idea.

option 3 is to start at 500 for 10-12 weeks and them bump to 750 for another half.

option 4 is to start at 750 and try high-ish test only cycle.

so, it will be test solo. im battling myself a bit, i dont wanna overkill mg's but also i wanna try and experience high-ish dose test to figure out esteogen managment and im curious about size increase.

im open to other ideas. i wanted to do primo with it but its impossible to get rn and i dont wanna go for another compound.

mast is probably pointless, i would rather fill mg's in test.

nandrolone is out of debate, im not interested in 19nors and dealing with mental sided, dont wanna big increase in scale/water weight.

eq is question mark but ive been reading about anxietty issues and im not sure if its worth the risk for me, especially with that stupid long ester. if i will feel bad, it will take long time for it to clear, if i will have low e2 issues again it will take long time and i dont wanna pop dbol cause of that

tren is out of debate completly, im not interested in that

so, it looks like it will be test only, maybe test + hgh. im open for that option. will see
 
few random notes...

bp is still borderline low, even in high-ish anabolics dose. i havent seen anything like 120/70 or above.

for while i was battling low bp, around 105-110/45-55.
rhr is around 55-60, so im happy with that.
im using 10mg cialis daily from start, no bp meds.

hydration is allways good, 5-6-7 liters of plain, cold water daily. no soda ever. sometimes i drink one or two non alcoholic beers at evening in pub with friends but other than that its water only. piss is clear, no smell, no bad color.

body hair growth is faster and hair is more dense on my chest and stomach. no hair on upper back yet. im happy about that.

beard is growing faster and i have liiiitlr bit more gray hair there but im happy with that.

libido is gone, im happy with that also. i can focus on importsnt things. but thats 100% cause of diet i would say.

also cause of diet, maybe cause of anabolics also, im very easily annoyed by stupid people during random interactions in real life. im pretty chill guy but sometimes people annoy me to extremes. but 0
issues with anger, i just breath and put headphones on... i can keep it in myself. again i think its cause of diet. i would call it "short fuse".

im much less social in life, like to spend time either alone or with few specific peopel that i wanna see. when im tired from trainin, hungry, im not in mood to go out, talk with people etc. also, normal daily activities, house chores etc became pretty hard to do sometimes. i need A LOT of coffe to keep goin.

ussually, when i have enough kcals, i eill have one morning coffe and one after lunch and thats it. small espresso.
rn, morning is tripple espresso, around 10am double and after lunch another double/triple and im still tired most of the time. no other source of caffeine.

sleep took a hit recently, i have hard time falling asleep and i wake up pretty often during the night which results in hard time getting out of bed at morning.
it sucks tbh, i was used to 8-9h of good sleep basicly every night, i like to sleep.. and i csn feel impact, its not good.

overall im happy with cut so far, its nice to not have to eat/cook/clean/shop so much, digestion isses are 0, in this way its big improvement. but energy, mood, motivation is waaaay down and cause of that, i cant wait for it to end. 7 more weeks...
 
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