deadguy said:As Ian and Bubles scoured along the paths of the enchanted forest of Lord Sanchez, they stumbled across a sheep that had been beaten and handcuffed to an alderberry bush. Baaaaaaaaaaaa...was the shreek heard as they approached the poor helpless animal.
"my Goodness!" exclaimed Ian, barely able to walk and wondering how he could rid himself of the flies that buzzed around his lips.
"What could have happened to that poor animal of the forest?", asked Bumbles as he rushed over to uncuff the sheep (or so Ian THOUGHT Bumbles was going to do).
Without even a moment's notice, Bumbles had the back legs of the sheep wrapped around his waist. The shrills coming from the sheep were unbearable to Ian. He was reminded of the time his uncle Stew made him sodomize the winter flocks back in his native Ireland. His uncle told him it would help to stimulate growth of the wool on the sheep and increase their yearly earnings.
Bumbles, however, paid no attention to Ian and his sufferings. He loved the feel of the wool against his pubes..sort of like velcro. To be continued
(And this boys and girls is how Velcro was invented... Who would have ever guessed that a horny midget with a fetish for sheep would come up with one of the greatest inventions the world has ever seen....)
Ian's suffering was great. He curled himself up into the fetal position and whimpered loudly. All the while Bumbles continued to perform unspeakable acts upon their food.
After what seemed like hours of intense suffering to Ian, the noises finally subsided. The sudden silence scared Ian. He knew that Bumbles had either worn himself out or the sheep had died. The truth was actually worse, because it wasn't just one of these things that had happened to the sheep, it was both.
"Well, atleast we don't have to worry about dinner" Bumbles said while pulling up his pants. Ian finally stoped sucking his thumb and looked up at bumbles. "How could you do that Bumbles?, I've told you about the suffering I had to endure at the hands of my uncle Stew". Bumbles simply shrugged his shoulders and said "I can't help it, When I see Mutten, I have to get to Nutten". Ian's mouth feel open and bumbles giggled cheerfully.
Ian had to get away, so he left camp and busied himself with the gathering of firewood while bumbles butchered the poor sheep's carcase. He had seen enough this day, first Lord Sanchez and then the sheep, this was almost more than his fragile mind could handle.
Ian had been so engrossed in his thoughts that when he finally came to himself he had no idea where he was, or in which direction the camp was. He looked in every direction but nothing seemed familar. He started calling out for Bumbles, but nothing came of his cries. Bumbles was either out of ear shot, or something dreadful had befallen him.
Ian, who's typical response to fear was to wet himself, did just that. He was standing there with a large pile of wood in his arms, and urine running down his leg. When suddenly he heard a small voice from below "Hey there fella... would ya watch where ya point'n that thing". Ian jumped back and droped most of the wood he was carrying on his feet. He was too frightened to feel the pain.
Once he saw what had spoken to him he was frozen with disbelief. Because there before him stood a small man about two feet tall wearing Green Pants, a green Coat, and a green Hat with a four leaf clover stuck in the band. THe little fellow had a short red beard with no mustache and he was glaring back at the scrutiny that Ian was giving him.
Ian sat there for a moment with his mouth hanging open.. and then he finally spoke. "Are.. Are .. are you a Leprochan?" The little fellow with the green out fit just continued to glare at Ian not saying anything. Ian regained a little bit of his composure and asked him again. "Are you a Leprochan?".
The man in Green rolled his eyes and started to turn away from Ian. Ian reached out and grabbed him with both hands. "You are a Leprochan aren't you? I've caught you, and that means you have to grant me a wish!". The leprochan struggled but could not escape Ian's grip.
After a few moments of struggling the little fellow finally gave up.."Iye.. I'm a Leprochan, and by duty, I'm bound to grant ya one wish" "But" "You have to do something for me first, simply catching a Leprochan is not enough to get ya a wish granted" You must do a couple of things for me first". Ian was thrilled, he was going to have a wish granted. This is something that he'd always dreamed about, but never really believed would happen to him. Finally, it was actually going to happen for him.
To be continued....
