I think I have a Problem

[Kelly Slater]

Ok, you guys have probably heard this time and time again, but I am really bummed out about my physique. My stats are as follows: 6'1" 245lbs at about 14% bodyfat, Im 27 years old.

I seem to spend about 10 hours a week in the gym and im constantly stressing over my diet. I love to work out and eating right is a well accepted challenge. I have put on over 45lbs in the past 4 years and I guess ive come a long way, but I don't see it anymore.

I bust my ass with the gym and diet stuff and i feel like i dont even look like im in shape or big. Everyone else seem to notice and crack jokes like "hey flex" and "whats up big dawg". I seem to shake my head and just notice my short-commings like my calves and that little gut I cant seem to get rid of.

I know im strong because I bounce at a club part time and I'll fight anyone one on one. I know how to handle myself, but my self esteem is way low when it comes to my body. I dont even take my shirt off at the beach (and i surf and live in san diego, so I am there quite regulary).

I dont abuse juice, but its hard for me to look in the mirror when im off cycle. I usually limit my cycles to about 2 per year with lots of time in between. Im healthy as a horse (blood tests) and I feel good most of the time and hardly ever get sick.

Ive read about "body dismorphia" or reverse anorexia and I believe I fall into that catagory.

I guess what I want to know is what you guys who have the same problem as me do to overcome it. My girlfriend thinks im crazy when i say Im small and "why do i put so much time into working out when it yields such little physical appearance".

Help

Peace...kelly

 

[spound]

Damn bro im sorry to hear this. Although not to this extent, I Have similar feelings sometimes about feeling small when everyone else talks about how big i am, especially when im off cycle. I always just compare myself to other guys (who most of which i am bigger than) which it sound like you are too. It helps a little for me but i dunno if it would do much for you Just a thought b/c i hate to hear this man. Good luck. Keep your head up brother

 

[spound]

We all do, what you do know is what separates the boys from the men and weekend warriors from the dedicated. With your frustration, right now is the time to not do AAS, you sound burned out. This is a perfect time to psychologically get addicted to AAS or abuse them, which you say you wont. I say take this as a normal part of training and take a short break say two to three weeks. The next step is to post this in the training section. I do believe you have a training/nutrition issue. Good luck and keep that head up. This is normal

I agree with the advice of BigK bro, it sounds like your too obssesive with your training (training too much) and a littl eburnt out. Take a short break and regroup. I would def. stay away from the AAS for now as well.....FOR SURE!

 

[alljackdup28]

come on dude

come on man we r all in this together get ur head up. when u see dudes bigger than u...that should inspire u just to lift harder to look like them. try gettin a trainin partner to motivate u it helps a lot (make sure hes stronger than u) ur prob big as shit and its all in ur head come on man im 20 and i know this and i only been lifting for 2 years!! stay up

Ok, you guys have probably heard this time and time again, but I am really bummed out about my physique. My stats are as follows: 6'1" 245lbs at about 14% bodyfat, Im 27 years old.

I seem to spend about 10 hours a week in the gym and im constantly stressing over my diet. I love to work out and eating right is a well accepted challenge. I have put on over 45lbs in the past 4 years and I guess ive come a long way, but I don't see it anymore.

I bust my ass with the gym and diet stuff and i feel like i dont even look like im in shape or big. Everyone else seem to notice and crack jokes like "hey flex" and "whats up big dawg". I seem to shake my head and just notice my short-commings like my calves and that little gut I cant seem to get rid of.

I know im strong because I bounce at a club part time and I'll fight anyone one on one. I know how to handle myself, but my self esteem is way low when it comes to my body. I dont even take my shirt off at the beach (and i surf and live in san diego, so I am there quite regulary).

I dont abuse juice, but its hard for me to look in the mirror when im off cycle. I usually limit my cycles to about 2 per year with lots of time in between. Im healthy as a horse (blood tests) and I feel good most of the time and hardly ever get sick.

Ive read about "body dismorphia" or reverse anorexia and I believe I fall into that catagory.

I guess what I want to know is what you guys who have the same problem as me do to overcome it. My girlfriend thinks im crazy when i say Im small and "why do i put so much time into working out when it yields such little physical appearance".

Help

Peace...kelly

 

[PDP]

You could try a shrink or perhaps an SSRI. You have the same problem that most dudes round these parts have (an Adonis complex... read the book) When you relaize that there are more important things in life than being "huge" things may get better. But because of our personality type there will prbably be another thing to obsess over. The answer is therapy. There is no shame, lots of dudes here need it.... trust me

 

[bigpmp]

Me Too

I deal with the same stuff bro. I am 5'11, 235 and feel like a shrimp. I was the short fat kid in high school that never got a second look. The only thing I had going was that I could play baseball. I have been training for 15 years now and I still see the same short fat kid everytime I look in the mirror. Everyone tells me how big I am, "What's up Big Swole" and shit like that. I weigh 235 with 12% BF and still see the same 185 pound 22% Bf kid I was in high school. It is very frustrating. My wife tells me I am crazy and says shit like "I don't know why I can't make you happy." I tell her it has nothing to do with her, it is me, but she doesn't believe me. All I can do is keep training. If nothing elese it gives me a release. I ran Tren for 12 weeks and have been off for a month now and it is killing me. I can't wait to slam that needle in my ass again. I don't have any answers for you, just wanted you to know you are not alone.

 

[dzl66]

Kelly,
Your obsessing 2 much about your body and are way to self absorbed.
Find other things to do that are fun, sounds to me like you are in a post cycle depressed crash. If you are not post cycle you should seriously consider an anti depressant.
The key is to accept what your body looks like and be happy with it,I know easier said than done.This does not mean that you must or will lose the fire to improve your physique.
Keep your head up and be thankful for what you have.
Good luck

 

[Bob Smith]

Kelly, I agree with some of the other guys that have suggested an SSRI. Talk to your doc about Zoloft. Very mild and works great. That will help lift your spirits.

Take a week off from the gym. Youre going to stress about it, I know, but force yourself to stay out of the gym for one full week. No lifting, no cardio. During this time, spend a good amount of time in the Training Forum to learn more about lifting. I think your routine needs a major change.

Give us an idea as to how you have been eating for the past month or two? Have you been trying to bulk, diet, what?

Stay off the AAS for now till you get this other areas figured out.

 

[urbadside]

Kelly, I agree with some of the other guys that have suggested an SSRI. Talk to your doc about Zoloft. Very mild and works great. That will help lift your spirits.

Take a week off from the gym. Youre going to stress about it, I know, but force yourself to stay out of the gym for one full week. No lifting, no cardio. During this time, spend a good amount of time in the Training Forum to learn more about lifting. I think your routine needs a major change.

Give us an idea as to how you have been eating for the past month or two? Have you been trying to bulk, diet, what?

Stay off the AAS for now till you get this other areas figured out.

well said, bro

 

[Kelly Slater]

Thanks for the input guys, its good to hear that Im not the only one out there like this. I know its silly, but it is a problem.

Well, im not lifting at all this week. I have been surfing just to stay a bit active though. Every two months or so I take a week off from the gym just to recoup. I havent been on any juice for over 8 months now and Ive actually have had some good success lifting naturally. I have hit a plateau right now though, so maybe a break is just what I need.

My diet is pretty good. I dont really worry about carbs or calories too much, but Im sure to get about 450 gs of protein per day. I usually split up my eating into 8 meals per day with around 50 gs of protein per meal. About 35% of my protein comes from supplements, while the rest is from food. I know it means shit to some people but I am certified in training and have been studying nutrition for about 5 years. I really dont think my lifting or diet is lacking, but I have hit a plateau, so i must change something now.

I guess I just need to get over myself.

Thanks Guys.

Peace...kelly

 

[crewboss]

Kelly, I agree with some of the other guys that have suggested an SSRI. Talk to your doc about Zoloft. Very mild and works great. That will help lift your spirits.

Take a week off from the gym. Youre going to stress about it, I know, but force yourself to stay out of the gym for one full week. No lifting, no cardio. During this time, spend a good amount of time in the Training Forum to learn more about lifting. I think your routine needs a major change.

Give us an idea as to how you have been eating for the past month or two? Have you been trying to bulk, diet, what?

Stay off the AAS for now till you get this other areas figured out.

KS - I think we all know the feeling to a certain extent but if the feeling is that strong these guys are right, you may want to take appropriate steps to educate yourself about what might be going on... Good luck bro, I wish you well.

BS - not disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing, but did you hear recent news about Zoloft and Paxil? New evidence out on a strong correlation between users of both drugs and suicide and attempted suicide. I don't know the source so I could be way off here, and I want to stress that by and large, people prescribed to those medications swear by them.. It has though, been a hot topic on national news over the past couple days, and GlaxoSmithKline and Pfizer are starting to take some heat..

 

[occam]

That hits home man....probably for a lot of us.

I've been through it........ a couple of times it became severe.

Take a week off of even thinking about training.......no meso, no body image stress, nothing. Surf all week.......chill with the folks who care most about you. Look at ageing people......losing their mobility, look at the truly overweight.......imagine their self resentment and frustration.

You are a fucking stud man........what percentage of the worlds population do you think has achieved what you have?

You are unhappy because you have set very high standards for yourself......that's a great thing man. Not that you are down.....but that you expect so much of yourself.

I doubt that people who achieve great things by their own blood sweat and tears are often or easily satisfied with themselves.

Dig in my friend, get a foot hold this week, and then refocus your attention and efforts on specific and measurable goals. Elucidate for yourself, perhaps in writing, what you want and how you plan on achieving it. Be detailed about how you will evaluate your progress and efforts.

I wish you peace of mind, good luck sir.

 

[Bob Smith]

KS - I think we all know the feeling to a certain extent but if the feeling is that strong these guys are right, you may want to take appropriate steps to educate yourself about what might be going on... Good luck bro, I wish you well.

BS - not disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing, but did you hear recent news about Zoloft and Paxil? New evidence out on a strong correlation between users of both drugs and suicide and attempted suicide. I don't know the source so I could be way off here, and I want to stress that by and large, people prescribed to those medications swear by them.. It has though, been a hot topic on national news over the past couple days, and GlaxoSmithKline and Pfizer are starting to take some heat..

I brielfy saw the news and have heard the rumors for a while now. I really dont care. I havent been on Zoloft for about 3 months now. the shit works great! I feel much more relaxed and comfortable in front of people while on it, last about 10x longer before I blow my load, and have never had any thoughts of suicide or anything. Good thing my insurance pays for most of it!

 

[grisb81]

I agree with the norm on this you should swallow your pride and get you an SSRI until you get going again. The hardest part is accepting the fact that yes I do need some meds to help me (at least it was for me). For what it does it has a bad name ANTIDEPRESSANT, but all it does it level all the nerve cells upstairs.

I have been on the meds for about 2 yrs. and cannot see myself going back to my old nervous ass self. The best one I have taken is PaxilCr it works great.

You might just be like me have a hard time coming off the shit. Some people can handle it while others cant. sorry to ramble just telling you my experience
'

 

[moralanimal]

Meds may or may not help. You really need to be assessed if it is that bad. The problem is if you are using AS meds may be a problem as the FDA is finally realizing they often increase aggression, suicidal ideation and can be toxic to your live. All are concerns for AS use. I only have heard of tricyclics being used of this but I am sure, if needed you could get an SSRI. Get assessed but try psychotherapy first.
Essentially what you are talking about is very common although highly underreported. Many popular buzz words have recently been attached to this behavioral, emotional and cognitive difficulty. There exists little research on the topic, largely due to the lack of clients who present for treatment with this complaint. It is much more likely
that a client with this pattern will present for treatment for depression or anxiety. Many will miss the body image issue, place it secondary to the depression or see it as a symptom of the depression. Body dysmorphic disorder is along the same continuum as OCD however it differs in the content and number of obsession(s). In male bodybuilders it is comorbid and often combined with some form of eating disorder (often binge eating disorder), low self esteem, and as mentioned depression. Placing a proper diagnosis on a bodybuilder is very difficult b/c the disorder needs to be viewed in the context of the culture of the individual. In this case excessive exercise for the norm population is a hobby and most people in current society will me criteria for an eating disorder if you have tried any of the current fad diets.
The prevalence for muscle dysmorphia is unknown but estimates predict that roughly 5% of bodybuilders have it and with 5 million gym memberships in this country it must be pretty high. About 50% of those with muscle dysmorphia report using AS. This is really understated as many lie about both.
Normal body builders spend roughly 40 minutes a day thinking about being to small, however this 5% spends an estimated 352 minutes a day. Compounding this is 50% of males with this disorder have poor insight into how it effects them and just how far off there perceptions are. Men with this disorder tend to check themselves out in mirrors 6 times more per day then those without it (some even take advantage of reflections in windows and others have been in car accidents as a result).
It can be assumed that a genetic predisposition does exist due to the other disorders on the same spectrum having evidence of genetic links. The predisposition alone is not enough to create the disorder but enough to create a vulnerability that will be can manifest under the proper psychosocial conditions. The psychosocial conditions are the very same problems women have had for centuries. Much of the current male ideals portrayed in our society are simply unattainable for most. This creates a gap from where you are to where you would like to be.
The good news is that is treatable. Some theorists attempt to explain the etiology along the lines of early development but this is unlikely. They appear to confuse it with narcissism which can be traced backed to 2 or 3 years old. This is very unlikely the case as this disorder is ego dystonic and essentially against self or distressing. Narcissism is ego syntonic but the 2 do have similarities.
The problem with treatment is again many wont seek help. Seeking help is also against what society says is manly. It is also likely
going to lead to decreased gym time which is translated to the individual shrinking and there worst fear. Treatment will likely be done with cognitive behavioral therapy. This essentially means you look at the persons thoughts and see how they effect mood and behavior. An example is I am not big enough, the mood then will likely be depressed and the behavior will be going to the gym for 15 hours. Another example may be I wont be respected if I am not huge. This is a surface issue at this point because an intermediate belief feeds this. These usually consist of rules the person holds that they may not be aware of (they may also not be aware of there thoughts as they often happen quickly and the person only realizes the negative emotion). The rule may be something like this- Dudes should be huge. Below this or feeding the rule is a core belief. The core belief may be latent for years before being activated by an event, for example not getting laid enough. The core belief may be something like I am inadequate. These are often learned early in life but need to be activated. So for our example early on the person gets some message they are inadequate. They develop rules, as everyone does, but there rules are maladaptive. In our example not getting laid at the bar repeadly elicits this early learned belief which results ion the automatic thought that you may not be aware of that tells you are too small and MUST be bigger. The problem is realy that core belief- whatever it may be for you. Take care and I hope all works out for you.