Meeting New People as an Adult

[Jabroni_Meathead]

It gets worse with age man. I am 40 and a military contractor that travels the world. I meet and have good times with people all the time at work but everybody my age has kids and excuses to do things. I am married but we dont want children so we can enjoy life before death but the sheep just want kids and sit at home getting fat.

 

[BoloYang2023]

Lol I'm trying to fuck a client's daughter.

this made me smile and laugh lol

 

[BoloYang2023]

It gets worse with age man. I am 40 and a military contractor that travels the world. I meet and have good times with people all the time at work but everybody my age has kids and excuses to do things. I am married but we dont want children so we can enjoy life before death but the sheep just want kids and sit at home getting fat.

yea im just gonna say it fuck having kids. i know this is gonna set some people off but its just not for everyone and the truth is they are expensive as fuck!

 

[Jabroni_Meathead]

yea im just gonna say it fuck having kids. i know this is gonna set some people off but its just not for everyone and the truth is they are expensive as fuck!

I will keep my sleep, money, and freedom while my wife keeps her figure.

PLUS i wont bring any tax paying slaves to society after being one myself..

 

[narta]

Kids are great if you want them, the plague if you don't. There is no right or wrong on that, just personal choice.

I have a kid, he is great, we have fun and we fight, it is what it is. My brother doesn't, he is a great uncle, but he would have been a shitty parent and he agrees with that himself.

/OT

 

[BoloYang2023]

Kids are great if you want them, the plague if you don't. There is no right or wrong on that, just personal choice.

I have a kid, he is great, we have fun and we fight, it is what it is. My brother doesn't, he is a great uncle, but he would have been a shitty parent and he agrees with that himself.

/OT

so i am the type to be brutally honest thats awesome man! me i got a kid but im only financially there due to the rules and the way the cookie crumbled but tbh i would be a fucking shitty parent too lol... so i appluad those who are good parents me i couldnt be one lol. @Jabroni_Meathead you do you buddy i agree with you though dont have kids and have fun life is too short for shit like that and its true its another mindless slave in the end

 

[Orc419]

I didn't expect for this thread to come back alive but I suppose I'll give an update on my journey. I no longer work at the bar, my main job I got a big promotion and now I'm salary and have to focus on this job and don't have time for a second. Still meeting people every now and then but I've come more to terms with loneliness. As a lot of gym bros can probably relate to I've never felt like I've really fit in anywhere. I've only ever met a couple of people in my life that I ever thought understood me and they are still close friends that I'm learning to appreciate more and more.

I've gotten in to studying philosophy and psychology a lot more to understand my place in this world. One big name that has completely changed my life is Carl Jung. I'm not sure if many people here would be in to his way of thinking but it all clicks with me so well it's uncanny. I've never heard an outlook on the human mind and life itself that was so profound as his and the Jungian psychologists who studied under him. If you feel lost in life and completely alone I couldn't recommend his works more. A good starting point would be the videos on Jung by the youtube channel Eternalised.

I've had a lot of ups and downs. Feeling of intense beauty and falls into the darkest parts of the human mind. But I'm hoping I'm on the right path to living a content life and becoming who I need to be. We're all gonna make it bros.

 

[BoloYang2023]

I didn't expect for this thread to come back alive but I suppose I'll give an update on my journey. I no longer work at the bar, my main job I got a big promotion and now I'm salary and have to focus on this job and don't have time for a second. Still meeting people every now and then but I've come more to terms with loneliness. As a lot of gym bros can probably relate to I've never felt like I've really fit in anywhere. I've only ever met a couple of people in my life that I ever thought understood me and they are still close friends that I'm learning to appreciate more and more.

I've gotten in to studying philosophy and psychology a lot more to understand my place in this world. One big name that has completely changed my life is Carl Jung. I'm not sure if many people here would be in to his way of thinking but it all clicks with me so well it's uncanny. I've never heard an outlook on the human mind and life itself that was so profound as his and the Jungian psychologists who studied under him. If you feel lost in life and completely alone I couldn't recommend his works more. A good starting point would be the videos on Jung by the youtube channel Eternalised.

I've had a lot of ups and downs. Feeling of intense beauty and falls into the darkest parts of the human mind. But I'm hoping I'm on the right path to living a content life and becoming who I need to be. We're all gonna make it bros.

to be honest man guess what we all die alone in the end. This isnt the old times of egypt we cant bury fools with us lol. so stay strong greatness comes out of solitude. your find your right one shit talk to a gym chick it happens bro youd be surprised how many might be in to you because of your gym dedication

 

[adamcarpenter]

Find a large 12 step meeting place. You’ll find lots of lifters there too, or at least a lot of people into fitness.

 

[Hayes88]

I didn't expect for this thread to come back alive but I suppose I'll give an update on my journey. I no longer work at the bar, my main job I got a big promotion and now I'm salary and have to focus on this job and don't have time for a second. Still meeting people every now and then but I've come more to terms with loneliness. As a lot of gym bros can probably relate to I've never felt like I've really fit in anywhere. I've only ever met a couple of people in my life that I ever thought understood me and they are still close friends that I'm learning to appreciate more and more.

I've gotten in to studying philosophy and psychology a lot more to understand my place in this world. One big name that has completely changed my life is Carl Jung. I'm not sure if many people here would be in to his way of thinking but it all clicks with me so well it's uncanny. I've never heard an outlook on the human mind and life itself that was so profound as his and the Jungian psychologists who studied under him. If you feel lost in life and completely alone I couldn't recommend his works more. A good starting point would be the videos on Jung by the youtube channel Eternalised.

I've had a lot of ups and downs. Feeling of intense beauty and falls into the darkest parts of the human mind. But I'm hoping I'm on the right path to living a content life and becoming who I need to be. We're all gonna make it bros.

Sounds like you are moving towards something new and exciting, happy for you bro!

I've had a lot of these talks with my current girl and yesterday we had a huge fight were she said "I think you should go see a friend to not keep all inside...", and in my angry mind I went "B'tch! Who?", but I didn't say that lol

Either way, I truly believe that a MALE brother (close friend) is as important as a male rolemodel. I also realised lately that I am to blame for not having friends, and so I offer an alternative issue to the "finding" of one, and that is wanting to have one truly.

With age I have gotten extremely comfortable in my own ways of living. The last year I had gotten people trying to reach out, but I as a hypocrite have excuses why I cannot meet or want to meet. I am trying to find fault in the person to not be worth my time (as with age everything is an investment), or me prioritize my own time at home or the gym. I am the one I complain about in other words...

I see those friends who have a rich extrovert life and they have tons of people inviting them everywhere, but they pull energy from that, and yes most are single as relationship require a damn extensive back and forth before a plan is made. I am not talking about a few sentences with someone in the gym, but a real connection.

I also realised that this has spread to every area in my life, I made a post a long time ago regarding becoming "boring" and that is true. I have money and time, yet I do very little with that besides focus on the boss back home or work (which doesn't need my attention). I can be wrong, but I would make a bet that most here without a close brother or two is the same as me? Finding excuses rather than seeing opportunities with new people.

 

[emogothtiddy]

Church is the absolute best way to always have friends and community. I will never be lonely or isolated because of this. I can always turn up to Bible study and hang out and socialize and be accepted.

 

[SunnyInAZ]

It gets worse with age man. I am 40 and a military contractor that travels the world. I meet and have good times with people all the time at work but everybody my age has kids and excuses to do things. I am married but we dont want children so we can enjoy life before death but the sheep just want kids and sit at home getting fat.

You’re the sheep whining about growing old and lonely. That’s the lie of not having kids. You think your enjoying life before death but gets old quick…having kids is never dull or old. It’s the greatest gift next to a great wife that God gives a REAL man…

 

[Outlier]

As test9999 said it gets harder with every year of age. People become more untrusting of others and really just set in their own ways/routines. If you’re into martial arts, then check out some dojos. Volunteer work is a good idea as well.

 

[lukiss96]

You’re the sheep whining about growing old and lonely. That’s the lie of not having kids. You think your enjoying life before death but gets old quick…having kids is never dull or old. It’s the greatest gift next to a great wife that God gives a REAL man…

That's a bit over the limit statement.

To each his own, everyone has a choice. Id he doesn't want children it's his choice, not yours and not mine.

 

[Dickwang]

. I have been thinking of trying to do some type of volunteer work or joining some type of club but I don't even know how to start.

I volunteer all the time….mostly non profit homeless programs or suicide prevention programs…Met a few good people there that I still shoot the Shit with now a days…Don’t hangout with them in person but it’s still good catching up with them via email or text…

If you’re still struggling to find people to meet or what not…. I suggest joining your local sports league. Or one within reasonable driving distance…

flag footbal…Soccer…dodgeball….etc. you’ll see them 1-2x a week depending on what sport you pick. sometimes they say hey come back toMy house for some burgers and dogs… and there you go 5 new friends…Join the coed leagues if you want to meet a girl….

It’s an automatic way to meet at least 15-20 people… however many are on your team

 

[Eman]

I joined a hiking club on meetup to do group stuff with. I've never done any of the other groups on there but you might find one you like. There are a lot of people that are in your shoes that go to the events as an excuse to meet other people and make friends. If you live in a more developed area there are probably a lot of options.

 

[Orc419]

Sounds like you are moving towards something new and exciting, happy for you bro!

I have certainly been moving towards the goal of maturity, and the end journey of maturity is finding inner peace and finding happiness within yourself. But I also realize that I am still young so it is important for me to embrace the outer world still and draw what I can from that.

An update on my journey: I feel like after 26 years I've finally started to put everything together. I'm starting to become spiritual. It's far too complicated to put it in to a brief summary but essentially I have started to embrace spirituality as humans have done for all of history until recently. I wouldn't say I'm a Christian but I believe in an abstract god which religions represent as something like Jesus or Allah. They are representations of what is beyond human knowledge.


I have overcome my trauma from the past. I've learned to give that up and move on. I've learned to wake up every day and cherish the gift of life. I've learned to chose every day to do the right thing and be a better man. And most importantly of all I've learned to do the things I don't want to do in order to grown and become better one step at a time.


Part of this is socializing more. Since I made this thread I've completely changed from the loner guy in the gym that talks to no one to the guy that knows everyone there. Last week I had the idea to hand out gifts at the gym to everyone I came across. I made little gift bags full of protein bars and snacks and handed them out to people near me as I worked out. I was basically a nervous wreck going in to it that day but it was an amazing experience. People were so grateful and happy to see someone do that, and talk to them in the gym. I hit it off with a lot of people and met some genuine friends that I talk to daily now.


I've met multiple girls since changing recently and it's incredible how extremely attractive you become when you are someone of affirms life and smiles at the beauty of life every moment. But I dont derive meaning from this attention anymore. I want to find a wife but I am in no rush for that. She will come eventually and I'll know.

Church is the absolute best way to always have friends and community. I will never be lonely or isolated because of this. I can always turn up to Bible study and hang out and socialize and be accepted.

One of the guys I met when giving out gifts is a guy whose dad is a pastor and we are going to start going together!

I volunteer all the time….mostly non profit homeless programs or suicide prevention programs…Met a few good people there that I still shoot the Shit with now a days…Don’t hangout with them in person but it’s still good catching up with them via email or text…

If you’re still struggling to find people to meet or what not…. I suggest joining your local sports league. Or one within reasonable driving distance…

I am very interested in volunteer work and I'm actively seeking it out now. And I'll definitely give those ideas a thought! I was thinking of starting jui jitsu training soon just need to pull the trigger. I'm aiming at starting Saturday!

I joined a hiking club on meetup to do group stuff with. I've never done any of the other groups on there but you might find one you like. There are a lot of people that are in your shoes that go to the events as an excuse to meet other people and make friends. If you live in a more developed area there are probably a lot of options.

Hiking is another idea I've had too! However I was going to use it as a tool for self reflection when being isolated in nature. But I'm sure as I get in to it I'll meet other people to hike with when I'd like.

 

[Looksmaxphen]

I’ve never had a friend in my whole life

 

[marsupial]

OP if you are really that irked by your loneliness and you want a way to meet other people who aren’t losers, go back to school for some kind of advanced degree.

That said, after age 27 or so, you’re not going to have genuine friendships not out of convenience that last. The time for that really is when you’re younger

 

[marsupial]

And no, now is not the worst time to be a single guy. Nearly any other time in the past, you were essentially forced to have a wife and kids by age 27. There was no hookup culture, no birth control, no whoremongering without std scare, and no sense of individualism back then like there is now. The fact that you can take a girl out for 1-2 dates and then have sex is unprecedented for the vast majority of any other time in history…or the fact that you can take vacation to various places outside the west for paid sex. Paid or unpaid, it was much scarcer back then