Powerlifting and relationships

[JTB3318]

Any of you boys/girls have issues with relationships because of your training? I have a wife, and she says she's supportive, but it never fails, when I'm at the gym, she will call me 20 min after I get there and ask when am I coming home? I don't think I'm asking much. 2 evenings during the week, and mornings on the weekends. On weekends I'm home before the wife and kids wake up. Do I have any hope of meaningful conflict resolution?

 

[shartking]

Are you leaving her home with the kids during primetime?

 

[JTB3318]

Ill leave work, get to the gym, and be home by 7-730. We agreed to this. I offered to go before work, but she needs help getting the kids ready for school. Its only 2 nights a week. So if thats what you call prime time then yeah I guess so

 

[shartking]

Can you go after the kids go to bed?

 

[Blange89]

I don't have kids, but I know when I first started powerlifting my marriage did take a hit. My wife was supportive but I became emotionally distant to her because I was using all my energy at the gym thinking about lifting.

 

[kosp]

build a basement gym and do like this guy:


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzV-nuLO_Lg

 

[mass gain]

@JTB3318, all the advice above is solid. Ultimately if you are really into the BB or PL lifestyle you can become and certainly appear to be quite self absorbed like you don't care about anything else.

One of my issues has been that I will not waver much on my workout routines and I always make time to get my workouts in. That is all good and great but when I can't make time for other things that matter in a relationship and I keep making time for WOs, then it becomes an issue.

Its hard sometimes but look at it like you should want the relationship as much as you want your lifting related goals. So sometimes you have to sacrifice and act like it. In relationships as in most aspects in life, actions speak louder than words.

 

[JTB3318]

yeah for sure

@JTB3318, all the advice above is solid. Ultimately if you are really into the BB or PL lifestyle you can become and certainly appear to be quite self absorbed like you don't care about anything else.

One of my issues has been that I will not waver much on my workout routines and I always make time to get my workouts in. That is all good and great but when I can't make time for other things that matter in a relationship and I keep making time for WOs, then it becomes an issue.

Its hard sometimes but look at it like you should want the relationship as much as you want your lifting related goals. So sometimes you have to sacrifice and act like it. In relationships as in most aspects in life, actions speak louder than words.

@JTB3318, all the advice above is solid. Ultimately if you are really into the BB or PL lifestyle you can become and certainly appear to be quite self absorbed like you don't care about anything else.

One of my issues has been that I will not waver much on my workout routines and I always make time to get my workouts in. That is all good and great but when I can't make time for other things that matter in a relationship and I keep making time for WOs, then it becomes an issue.

Its hard sometimes but look at it like you should want the relationship as much as you want your lifting related goals. So sometimes you have to sacrifice and act like it. In relationships as in most aspects in life, actions speak louder than words.

Yeah for sure. The gym is a passion of mine, and it has been for 20 years. But so is being a great husband and dad. As much as I love the lifestyle, and I hate to use the word "hobby", that's what it is.

 

[JuiceJohn]

Any of you boys/girls have issues with relationships because of your training? I have a wife, and she says she's supportive, but it never fails, when I'm at the gym, she will call me 20 min after I get there and ask when am I coming home? I don't think I'm asking much. 2 evenings during the week, and mornings on the weekends. On weekends I'm home before the wife and kids wake up. Do I have any hope of meaningful conflict resolution?

Do you give her enough attention during the day, or you are working and you guys don't see each other?
More of a personal question, but what happens when you get home, do you guys just sit on the couch or do nothing if that's the case I'm not seeing why wouldn't she let you have free time by yourself.
Or maybe she has a really hard time being alone with the kids?
She must be missing something that you can offer to her whatever that is, give it to her more often.
If the scenario looks something like this: you get home, go to the gym and you guys go sleep then I see why...

 

[Country Club Hero]

If powerlifting is all you are doing you can get everything needed for that to do at home. Then round up the kids each time you train and have them watch so you can begin showing them proper form.

I had a power rack with adjustable bench and 500lbs of plates and an olympic bar when I started training. Had it set up under a carport out back. No heat or AC and we are talking extreme humidity of the deep, Deep South.

i eventually built a pull-up/dip rack. But yeah man, totally doable at home and you won’t have to hear shit from the old lady because you are still home.

 

[JTB3318]

Do you give her enough attention during the day, or you are working and you guys don't see each other?
More of a personal question, but what happens when you get home, do you guys just sit on the couch or do nothing if that's the case I'm not seeing why wouldn't she let you have free time by yourself.
Or maybe she has a really hard time being alone with the kids?
She must be missing something that you can offer to her whatever that is, give it to her more often.
If the scenario looks something like this: you get home, go to the gym and you guys go sleep then I see why...

Haha no we never go right to sleep when I get home. I get it, having to take the kids to dance and soccer practice by yourself, come home and feed them, then bath time, it can get a little hectic. I made an adjustment. Just one night a week. And it's not on a high stress evening. Tuesday, Saturday and Sunday are now my training days

 

[JTB3318]

The

If powerlifting is all you are doing you can get everything needed for that to do at home. Then round up the kids each time you train and have them watch so you can begin showing them proper form.

I had a power rack with adjustable bench and 500lbs of plates and an olympic bar when I started training. Had it set up under a carport out back. No heat or AC and we are talking extreme humidity of the deep, Deep South.

i eventually built a pull-up/dip rack. But yeah man, totally doable at home and you won’t have to hear shit from the old lady because you are still

The programming I am receiving right now uses specialty bars on occasion (SSB, cambered bar, etc). Thats the only reason I go to the gym. I have a similar setup to you. I even made my pullup rack with 1" pipe and fittings i borrowed from work. Fabbed it in my front yard. I do still use my home gym when no specialty bars are used.

 

[grey]

Any of you boys/girls have issues with relationships because of your training? I have a wife, and she says she's supportive, but it never fails, when I'm at the gym, she will call me 20 min after I get there and ask when am I coming home? I don't think I'm asking much. 2 evenings during the week, and mornings on the weekends. On weekends I'm home before the wife and kids wake up. Do I have any hope of meaningful conflict resolution?

I make my gf and daughter wake up at 0430 to lift with me.

Doesn't solve all the problems, but they sure can't say that lifting takes time away from them.

 

[JTB3318]

I make my gf and daughter wake up at 0430 to lift with me.

Doesn't solve all the problems, but they sure can't say that lifting takes time away from them.

Hahaha.... and you're still alive??? My wife would slice my femoral artery while I slept if I tried that fuckery.

 

[grey]

Hahaha.... and you're still alive??? My wife would slice my femoral artery while I slept if I tried that fuckery.

The gf is often very surly when i wake her up and the daugh is surly after the workout because the gf got up 10 mins late and now the daugh doesn't have 75 minutes to fuck with her hair.


Doesn't solve all the issues Just the biggest one.

 

[JTB3318]

The gf is often very surly when i wake her up and the daugh is surly after the workout because the gf got up 10 mins late and now the daugh doesn't have 75 minutes to fuck with her hair.


Doesn't solve all the issues Just the biggest one.

They will thank you for it one day

 

[grey]

They will thank you for it one day

They are female, seems unlikely

 

[SippinCoffee]

I convinced my wife to start working out with me. Now we just got to the gym together. My oldest kid is a 13 year old girl. So she's responsible enough to keep everyone alive a couple of nights a week. We just leave after the 2 little ones go to sleep. So now gym time is like our thing together. Works like a champ. Bench takes a while due to changing so many plates...but everything else is pretty easy.

 

[JTB3318]

I convinced my wife to start working out with me. Now we just got to the gym together. My oldest kid is a 13 year old girl. So she's responsible enough to keep everyone alive a couple of nights a week. We just leave after the 2 little ones go to sleep. So now gym time is like our thing together. Works like a champ. Bench takes a while due to changing so many plates...but everything else is pretty easy.

I'm jealous. My wife hates lifting. The shitty thing is that she's of Northern European descent. She's a fucking viking. I've seen her pull 225lb off the floor on her first day deadlifting. Her squat and bench aren't bad either for being untrained. She was born for this, but has zero interest in it. It's a tragedy. We worked things out though. I now train Wednesdays after work, and Saturday and Sunday before everyone gets up.

 

[Big_paul]

I'm jealous. My wife hates lifting. The shitty thing is that she's of Northern European descent. She's a fucking viking. I've seen her pull 225lb off the floor on her first day deadlifting. Her squat and bench aren't bad either for being untrained. She was born for this, but has zero interest in it. It's a tragedy. We worked things out though. I now train Wednesdays after work, and Saturday and Sunday before everyone gets up.

Sounds like excellent breeding stock. You can expect powerful children. You may be paying a hefty dowry for females though.