Help me fix me (very long-winded)

[BlueBoy]

I’ve been obese for the entirety of my life aside from a time where I was incredibly skinny fat.
*My stats for context: 34/m, 6’3, 245lbs, appx 35%bf. Highest was 300 and lowest was 205 and still very fat with an unsustainable lifestyle (for me) that I’ll explain.

I am a total pain in the ass as I am a person who often seeks guidance from fit folks and I acknowledge that I have a lot of “buts”. The reason for the “buts” are sadly real though I know at least 50% of those who respond to this will argue and I totally understand and agree with those arguments. However, I believe that I’m somewhat of an anomaly.

I began taking my health seriously in 2014 when I began lifting and measuring foods. Over some years I would fall off because I would get frustrated with the lack of physical changes in my body and health and sought out professional help through various medical check-ups and through several personal trainers. According to the doctors I was fine and the trainers assumed that I was cheating. I’m sure they see that occasionally but to me that would be an insane thing to do knowing that you can’t be helped without being honest.

Eventually I decided to run an experiment to locate my maintenance calorically intake as accurately as possible (I should’ve done it earlier but I wasn’t totally aware nor had reason to doubt the trainers or even online calculators).
Consuming only black coffee, eggs, chicken, rice, and steamed broccoli with no cooking oils or calorie dense seasonings, I began with a 2 week run off only these foods at 2,600cal per day where I weighed in heavier at the conclusion. After a week break, I repeated this at 2,400cal, 2,200 and then 1,800cal where I finally found a deficit. I moved up to 2,000 calories where I found maintenance. At this time, I was five years “experienced” and yes, I understand that given my stats that this is highly unlikely.

Hormones were slightly fucked but nothing exciting and no noticeable issues with the thyroid according to blood tests. And though I am coming to YOU for your experience, knowledge and wisdom, let’s please assume that what I am saying is accurate and true to remain constructive. A very respectful and kind ask.

I’ve yo-yo’ed for so GD long because the cuts were absolutely dreadful pre-GLP1s. At 205, I stopped the cut at 1,100 calories while lifting and running as I prepared for a physical fitness test that I could barely pass from depletion and obvious lack of muscle mass.

I guess my ask is really fundamental. What do I do? I’ve never put on any quality strength or size due to constant (though inconsistent) deficits. But I never get to where I need to go in the cuts because eventually I burn out while training on essentially on an empty gas tank. Because of this, I’ve gained and lost the same 15-25lbs over the last decade essentially. Fight like hell for a couple of months to lose a little, fatigue and then gain it back easily.

As of now, I’ve taken the “stfu” approach and I’m pretty locked-in. But I’m curious if anyone has experienced or have seen experiences like mine where a person’s maintenance is so low. For now, I’m busting ass to get there but I’m hopeful to find if anyone has a remedy or an idea as to how to get that maintenance up so the cuts aren’t even more damaging and devastating to my metabolic health.
Do I continue the cut until I’m at a reasonable body fat no matter the caloric intake or do I get to level one, back to maintenance or even surplus a while and cut again?

Current cut: 268>245 and hovering there despite no changes in diet. I’ve also reintroduced testosterone after a break from my TRT for fertility purposes.
Training: U/L + inconsistent cardio
Lifestyle Activity: ≈12,000 steps/day
Nutrition: < or = 1,550cal/day
Dosing: 200mg Test, 2iuHGH, various health supps

 

[nullandvoid]

I feel your calories are way too low. At some point, your body is going to say "fuck this" and start turning down your metabolism. Get a thyroid panel, most importantly include reverse T3 which never gets checked. I'm betting your reverse T3 is well above top end of reference range. You can either come off that extreme deficit over a few months to recover or supplement T3 directly. Fat loss just isn't going to happen with rT3 screwing things up.

 

[BlueBoy]

I feel your calories are way too low. At some point, your body is going to say "fuck this" and start turning down your metabolism. Get a thyroid panel, most importantly include reverse T3 which never gets checked. I'm betting your reverse T3 is well above top end of reference range. You can either come off that extreme deficit over a few months to recover or supplement T3 directly. Fat loss just isn't going to happen with rT3 screwing things up.

I agree with the calories being too low and that has been largely the reason for my lack of success. Eventually the loss begins to slow and I’ll have to cut calories again and again. I’m running dry lol.

I just got bloods done but I’d not heard of the rT3 until now. I’ll read up on it. All that was tested was TSH which from what I understand is a basic functions test.

Thank you for this.

 

[Steve0691]

2,000 calories is a bit lower than i'd expect for someone your size but can still work with it. Id agree to get thyroids and just go get a indepth blood work panel while you're at it. Get apoB levels checked, if those are trash then it might give you an extra something to motivate you as well.
As far as weight loss goes, you have to change your mindset to look at this as a long term work in progress because honestly you need to basically do this in cycles of muscle gain/building metabolism up, then dieting down and repeat multiple times.
If i were you, try to diet down the 15-25lbs you keep yo-yoing and then essentially do a reverse diet where you build up calories slowly over weeks for a few months time, build your maintenance level up and build some muscle, then go into the diet again and repeat.
This isnt an easy task, switching gears between dieting and cutting repeatedly is tough. Id probably look into getting a coach who can keep you in line.

Most important thing you can do is ditch the "buts" Life happens to everyone and no one cares what happens to you and life doesnt care about fair. Making an excuse, whether you think its "valid" doesnt change your situation and never will, only you can do that.

 

[BlueBoy]

2,000 calories is a bit lower than i'd expect for someone your size but can still work with it. Id agree to get thyroids and just go get a indepth blood work panel while you're at it. Get apoB levels checked, if those are trash then it might give you an extra something to motivate you as well.
As far as weight loss goes, you have to change your mindset to look at this as a long term work in progress because honestly you need to basically do this in cycles of muscle gain/building metabolism up, then dieting down and repeat multiple times.
If i were you, try to diet down the 15-25lbs you keep yo-yoing and then essentially do a reverse diet where you build up calories slowly over weeks for a few months time, build your maintenance level up and build some muscle, then go into the diet again and repeat.
This isnt an easy task, switching gears between dieting and cutting repeatedly is tough. Id probably look into getting a coach who can keep you in line.

Most important thing you can do is ditch the "buts" Life happens to everyone and no one cares what happens to you and life doesnt care about fair. Making an excuse, whether you think its "valid" doesnt change your situation and never will, only you can do that.

I have been juggling the idea of doing just that; reversing and repeat to nurture whatever it is that has happened (or what I’ve done).

You’re right about the “buts”. My intention was to relay that whatever this shortcoming may be, it doesn’t matter. There is a body fat problem that needs to be solved nonetheless.

I hate the idea of reverse dieting while still fat af, but I’ll definitely get into it in moderation. I feel like this is likely the best approach regardless, but I tend to psych myself out by others saying to cut down to acceptable composition but I also know that doing so would further push maintenance lower and lower.

 

[Steve0691]

I have been juggling the idea of doing just that; reversing and repeat to nurture whatever it is that has happened (or what I’ve done).

You’re right about the “buts”. My intention was to relay that whatever this shortcoming may be, it doesn’t matter. There is a body fat problem that needs to be solved nonetheless.

I hate the idea of reverse dieting while still fat af, but I’ll definitely get into it in moderation. I feel like this is likely the best approach regardless, but I tend to psych myself out by others saying to cut down to acceptable composition but I also know that doing so would further push maintenance lower and lower.

I get it trust me, its very hard to just “ssitch gears” and immediately swing from a strict gain into a strict diet then back n forth best thing is to just remember that the longer you stick with it the easier itll become. Also just go slow n steady.

 

[BlueBoy]

I get it trust me, its very hard to just “ssitch gears” and immediately swing from a strict gain into a strict diet then back n forth best thing is to just remember that the longer you stick with it the easier itll become. Also just go slow n steady.

Will do. Thanks for the encouragement.