80% of romance novels are written by women, in which the male protagonists' appearance is described in the text in just the same way as they look on the book covers.
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So what is your 'why'? Of all the hobbies one might have, what makes you dedicate so much time to training, physique, nutrition, etc.?
- Thread starter BuildABro
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narta
Member
Sorry top burst your bubble, but a good legal team, a gun, or both, depending on the situation, is what is going to dominate every.single.time.
Not a theory.
Money, power, influence, confidence, intellect, education, a good legal team, and a gun. Notice how "having abs" isn't on the list.
BuildABro
Well-known Member
Even though I am married going on a decade now and I am clearly out of the modern dating loop, I find it hard to believe that women would not prefer a hard bodied dude that clearly prioritizes taking care of himself to some guy with a body like a Buddha statue.
Has the 'body positivity' or fat acceptance bullshit tied into social justice notions touted by Gen Z and below really sank to that level? I guess it's possible, but ultimately to me it's irrelevant. I need the body that I have built for my own personal edification. My gym time is my daily catharsis from our clown world. Women can like it or hate it. They can find it attractive or think I am a vain and self absorbed dickhead. Makes no difference to me. I am going to keep doing what I am doing regardless.
Has the 'body positivity' or fat acceptance bullshit tied into social justice notions touted by Gen Z and below really sank to that level? I guess it's possible, but ultimately to me it's irrelevant. I need the body that I have built for my own personal edification. My gym time is my daily catharsis from our clown world. Women can like it or hate it. They can find it attractive or think I am a vain and self absorbed dickhead. Makes no difference to me. I am going to keep doing what I am doing regardless.
narta
Member
Well it is on the list, but it's the cherry on top, not the main course or even the desert. It's nice to have, but compared to the wagyu a5 steak it pales into comparison
Some studies to rebut the gaslighting around irrelevance of physique:
"Evolution equips sexually reproducing species with mate choice mechanisms that function to evaluate the reproductive consequences of mating with different individuals. Indeed, evolutionary psychologists have shown that women's mate choice mechanisms track many cues of men's genetic quality and ability to invest resources in the woman and her offspring. One variable that predicted both a man's genetic quality and his ability to invest is the man's formidability (i.e. fighting ability or resource holding power/potential). Modern women, therefore, should have mate choice mechanisms that respond to ancestral cues of a man's fighting ability. One crucial component of a man's ability to fight is his upper body strength. Here, we test how important physical strength is to men's bodily attractiveness. Three sets of photographs of men's bodies were shown to raters who estimated either their physical strength or their attractiveness. Estimates of physical strength determined over 70% of men's bodily attractiveness. Additional analyses showed that tallness and leanness were also favoured, and, along with estimates of physical strength, accounted for 80% of men's bodily attractiveness. Contrary to popular theories of men's physical attractiveness, there was no evidence of a nonlinear effect; the strongest men were the most attractive in all samples."
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s44202-023-00108
"A recent Australian study demonstrated that both men and women want to have less body fat and more muscularity than they perceived that they had, and that men and women’s body ideals are more extreme than the opposite sex finds most attractive. The present study aimed to provide more evidence for the discrepancy between self-reported actual and ideal body fat and muscularity. Further, the present study aimed to explore the relationship between ideal bodies, and the bodies reported to be most attractive by the opposite sex by examining a sample of heterosexual North American men and women. Using data from 362 participants recruited through Amazon’s MTurk, this study employed figural rating scales to assess participants' actual and ideal body fat and muscularity, as well as their perceptions of the most attractive body for the opposite sex. Results showed that men wanted to have less body fat and more muscularity, and women wanted to have less body fat than they perceived themselves to have. Additionally, results showed that men’s ideal body was in-line with women’s preferences. However, analogous to prior research in an Australian sample, women wanted to be thinner than what men found most attractive. These findings underscore the importance of addressing body dissatisfaction and promoting healthy body image ideals. Future interventions should focus on challenging societal beauty standards and promoting body acceptance, taking into account the influence of media and social factors on body image perceptions and preferences."
"In addition to women’s mate preferences for men faces, men’s bodily features are highly desirable in women’s mate choice. For example, women are more attracted to men’s physical features that signal sexually selected characteristics, such as high waist to hip ratios (Henss, 2000), low waist to chest ratios (Braun & Bryan, 2006; Buunk & Dijkstra, 2005), high shoulder to hip ratios (Pazhoohi et al., 2019), and strong body types (Sell et al., 2017). It is argued that such physical features signal good genetic quality and women may benefit from choosing a high-quality mate to potentially pass down such traits to their offspring (Sell et al., 2017). These physical traits are considered to be honest signals, since they are costly to produce, and only high-quality individuals can afford to display such features (Thornhill & Gangestad, 1999; Zahavi & Zahavi, 1997). Strong bodies require energetic demands, and the ability to resist diseases; therefore, men’s phenotypic qualities reflect genetic quality (Sell et al., 2017). Men with formidable features are more likely to succeed during intrasexual competitive displays, such as being successful in direct conflict over resources (Sell et al., 2009), hunting (Apicella, 2014), and in coalition formation (Lukazsweski et al., 2015). Direct benefits, in the form of protection and immediate resource acquisition, plays an important role in women’s mate preferences and indicates that formidability is an important criterion in mate selection (Sell et al., 2017)."
"Evolution equips sexually reproducing species with mate choice mechanisms that function to evaluate the reproductive consequences of mating with different individuals. Indeed, evolutionary psychologists have shown that women's mate choice mechanisms track many cues of men's genetic quality and ability to invest resources in the woman and her offspring. One variable that predicted both a man's genetic quality and his ability to invest is the man's formidability (i.e. fighting ability or resource holding power/potential). Modern women, therefore, should have mate choice mechanisms that respond to ancestral cues of a man's fighting ability. One crucial component of a man's ability to fight is his upper body strength. Here, we test how important physical strength is to men's bodily attractiveness. Three sets of photographs of men's bodies were shown to raters who estimated either their physical strength or their attractiveness. Estimates of physical strength determined over 70% of men's bodily attractiveness. Additional analyses showed that tallness and leanness were also favoured, and, along with estimates of physical strength, accounted for 80% of men's bodily attractiveness. Contrary to popular theories of men's physical attractiveness, there was no evidence of a nonlinear effect; the strongest men were the most attractive in all samples."
https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s44202-023-00108
"A recent Australian study demonstrated that both men and women want to have less body fat and more muscularity than they perceived that they had, and that men and women’s body ideals are more extreme than the opposite sex finds most attractive. The present study aimed to provide more evidence for the discrepancy between self-reported actual and ideal body fat and muscularity. Further, the present study aimed to explore the relationship between ideal bodies, and the bodies reported to be most attractive by the opposite sex by examining a sample of heterosexual North American men and women. Using data from 362 participants recruited through Amazon’s MTurk, this study employed figural rating scales to assess participants' actual and ideal body fat and muscularity, as well as their perceptions of the most attractive body for the opposite sex. Results showed that men wanted to have less body fat and more muscularity, and women wanted to have less body fat than they perceived themselves to have. Additionally, results showed that men’s ideal body was in-line with women’s preferences. However, analogous to prior research in an Australian sample, women wanted to be thinner than what men found most attractive. These findings underscore the importance of addressing body dissatisfaction and promoting healthy body image ideals. Future interventions should focus on challenging societal beauty standards and promoting body acceptance, taking into account the influence of media and social factors on body image perceptions and preferences."
"In addition to women’s mate preferences for men faces, men’s bodily features are highly desirable in women’s mate choice. For example, women are more attracted to men’s physical features that signal sexually selected characteristics, such as high waist to hip ratios (Henss, 2000), low waist to chest ratios (Braun & Bryan, 2006; Buunk & Dijkstra, 2005), high shoulder to hip ratios (Pazhoohi et al., 2019), and strong body types (Sell et al., 2017). It is argued that such physical features signal good genetic quality and women may benefit from choosing a high-quality mate to potentially pass down such traits to their offspring (Sell et al., 2017). These physical traits are considered to be honest signals, since they are costly to produce, and only high-quality individuals can afford to display such features (Thornhill & Gangestad, 1999; Zahavi & Zahavi, 1997). Strong bodies require energetic demands, and the ability to resist diseases; therefore, men’s phenotypic qualities reflect genetic quality (Sell et al., 2017). Men with formidable features are more likely to succeed during intrasexual competitive displays, such as being successful in direct conflict over resources (Sell et al., 2009), hunting (Apicella, 2014), and in coalition formation (Lukazsweski et al., 2015). Direct benefits, in the form of protection and immediate resource acquisition, plays an important role in women’s mate preferences and indicates that formidability is an important criterion in mate selection (Sell et al., 2017)."
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HeatherSwanson
Member
Of course there is always a bigger dog with a bigger stick with more resources. That's not a reason to not level up as much a possible. I've got lawyers, several of them. As they are pricey and not always needed, I avoid them. My lived experience is that what I'm doing works and so until someone else has a better operating system with their fruits visible for me to judge I'll carry on.
narta
Member
Why the two extremes only? It's not black or white, there is the grey: the average dude that does take care of himself, but doesn't have a six pack. What he does have, is manners, humor, great hair, smells good and he is fun to talk.
In our little cult, bodyfat and six packs, being big and threaded is the ultimate goal, but out there in the world we are wackos, that grunt too much, are not fun, with their meal preps and whatnot. We are the equivalent of nerds, without the cool factor, with the added prejudice that big muscles=small brain.
Why do you care about what women think if you are only doing it for yourself and you are fucking married, anyway?
BuildABro
Well-known Member
I am more than willing to admit my "us vs them" mentality, along with all the fucked up quirks and idiosyncrasies that go along with living this life.
My wife is used to it by now and has not left me yet, but to some 'normal' chick roughly my age in a potential dating situation? I am sure she would quickly find me to be a raving lunatic with all of my neurotic tendencies surrounding exercise and food. Hell, even most females who are into fitness would probably find my mannerisms intolerable.
This is just my cross to bear though as there is no going back.
BuildABro
Well-known Member
I don't care, which I thought I was clear on.
laclark89
Well-known Member
Oh my, I love this post op it’s entertaining. But it’s pretty sad, worse than my spelling lol.
I started working out at around 10 years old.
#1 my oldest sister a real gym girl from the early 90’s got me into my first routine, because she wanted someone to workout with and I was the man of the house.
#2 for sports it made me bigger faster and stronger. Not to compete with little kids lol.
#3 look good with a shirt off.
My older sister gave me her weights and would buy me sups lol. Who remembers these. She’s been in the gym 30+ years and is disgusted by most gym guy says they’re a turn off. More emotional and insecure than most woman. Tell me she’s not 99% right?
Every guy on this site that uses aas for a combat sport is a nerd.
and the other guy I do it to look good on top of a women so she remembers Me? That’s a mental problem . She will remember that fat well hung dude she had before u with actual length and shaft width way before she will remember ur jacked body. 9/10 women don’t really care about a physique, they may actually like u with a dad bod better.
I started working out at around 10 years old.
#1 my oldest sister a real gym girl from the early 90’s got me into my first routine, because she wanted someone to workout with and I was the man of the house.
#2 for sports it made me bigger faster and stronger. Not to compete with little kids lol.
#3 look good with a shirt off.
My older sister gave me her weights and would buy me sups lol. Who remembers these. She’s been in the gym 30+ years and is disgusted by most gym guy says they’re a turn off. More emotional and insecure than most woman. Tell me she’s not 99% right?
Feeling tough like needing to be on gear to not get chocked blue or tapped uncle by a 15 year old lmao. Anyone who uses gear to compete with class/ teammates is a pos and very insecure. I get it I stopped boxing in my early 30’s when I started trt. I though what I need gear to not get flatlined by a 17 year old that’s about to go pro, that’s not right.
Every guy on this site that uses aas for a combat sport is a nerd.
and the other guy I do it to look good on top of a women so she remembers Me? That’s a mental problem . She will remember that fat well hung dude she had before u with actual length and shaft width way before she will remember ur jacked body. 9/10 women don’t really care about a physique, they may actually like u with a dad bod better.
narta
Member
IS your experience as stated here?
I had my ass handed to me by some Harry Potter mfs through the years. Always the fucker with the weasel team of lawyers in his pocket. And I nailed some dudes that had bigger shoulders than mine.
P.S.
HeatherSwanson
Member
LD is able to have a body like that because he has resources at his disposal and social proof in the form of fame.
Because I'm not extravagantly wealthy and not famous like LD. I rely on what I believe is now called looks maxing and social proof (being useful to others whether that is being desired for utility because I'm skilled or I'm a bridge to others, like helpful to your community)
If LD was making $100,000 a year in the US and had that body, he'd be fucking a land whale soccer with 3 from 2... Which plays into what I'm saying my lived experience is. Very seldom am I not the most jacked guy in the room and as such get better treatment. If you've experienced it, you'll know it.
Underworld
Member
In high school and college, it was sports and being a bouncer. Then, it was the military, staying strong and fit between deployments. Now, it's for health and aesthetic reasons. It's like a habit too. Can't live without it.
The most jacked dude here is forgetting about Di Caprio's still pretty face and baby blue eyes.
Take the Hollywood cred away, that stuff still works, for us peasant women.
I am not going to say I would not be surprised if his wife had a bit on the side, just for a change from such a deluded, self-obsessed man, but kind of yes....
Take the Hollywood cred away, that stuff still works, for us peasant women.
I am not going to say I would not be surprised if his wife had a bit on the side, just for a change from such a deluded, self-obsessed man, but kind of yes....
narta
Member
There is a saying that you get a rich guy, strip him from his riches, give him the same opportunities like the average Joe and he will become a rich guy again.
If LD became an average guy, his charms, charisma etc will eventually made him successful. You think he is landing all those super models with his money? Why Bill Gates, Elon Musk or *enter random rich guy* don't all have strings of younger than 25yrs old super models in their bed? They 've got the money, but they don't have the other stuff
Depends on the situation. In a social event? Probably. In a business meeting? Nope.
Excel.exe
Member
Depressed friend ODed because none of those 3 kids were his. I had to drag his ass to the gym for 3 years. I started working out during that time and enjoyed it.
He is now married to a different woman and has 2 healthy kids.
He is now married to a different woman and has 2 healthy kids.
narta
Member
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