Tell me a joke I'm board

[wedorecover]

title says it all who's got some old fashion jokes

 

[CdnGuy]

What's the difference between the G spot and a golf ball?

 

[CdnGuy]

A guy will actually search for the golf ball

 

[insaiyan93]

Whats the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?







You cant unscrew a pregnant woman.

Ba dum tsss

 

[CdnGuy]

How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?

Call and tell her about it

 

[wedorecover]

Your momma is so fat she goes to KFC and licks other people's fingers

 

[wedorecover]

Why do tweakers always fuck doggie style


So they can both look out the window

 

[CdnGuy]

Why do women have orgasms?
Just another reason to moan really

 

[wedorecover]

What did the women do when she got home from the battered woman shelter


The dises of the bitch knows what's good for her

 

[johntt44]

A guy gets in line behind a woman at a supermarket checkout. On the belt she has bread, cheese, milk, and some ham. He looks at her and says"Hey, I bet you're single!". She says" you can tell all that by looking at my groceries?" He says"nah, you're ugly!"

 

[mudbutt22]

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing. You already told her twice.

 

[wedorecover]

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing. You already told her twice.

What do you call a women with one black eye


..... a good listener

 

[Kakarot]

Here's a good one

 

[Kakarot]

Here's a good one
View attachment 56259

Underdosaged?lmao

 

[Fatdum]

Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"

Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."

 

[Fatdum]

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."
She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

 

[wedorecover]

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."
She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

Now that's funny

 

[Fatdum]

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it in!

If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
You made her chain too long!!

 

[MisterSuperGod]

[ Heard this one during the Iraqi freedom campaign. ]

What do Iraq and Fred Flintstone have in common?

They both look out the window and see rubble.

 

[miahlaw]

A guy walks into a bar...


The other guy ducks.


2 pollocks went bird hunting. The one asked the other "why don't you think we got any birds today?"
The second pollock replies "I don't know? I guess we werent throwing the dogs high enough"


Why can't pollocks eat pickles?

They can't get their hand out of the jar.


As men reference sports a lot i always found this comparison humerous.. "I married a tight end... But now she's a full back.