Personal log from first cycle

so far, im still around 77-78kg's. depends on day.

5mg tirz / 2mg reta every 5 days and my appettite is still shit, which is not bad tbh.
im slooowly lowering tirz, will ride on 5mg for 2-3 more weeks, rhen 2,5 for whole october and then remove it. will see how reta alone crushed my appettite, honestly it wont be issue when i need to push kcals higher.

but it looks like i wont need much from start to gain weight, will see. it wont be cleanest bulk from kcal/fat perspective i guess but i cant wait for cheese. i have too big love relationship with it.. :D

i will abuse honey, fruits, bread a bit as carbs and for protein i can get away with chicken/curd/whey. probably will get away with less whey as cheeses have 25-30g of protein per 100g, peanut butter has some, overall i will be at 180g per day minimum still. dont wanna pound more chicken as it got quite boring this cut...

i will reintroduce oats in shakes tho. its nice carb source in morning shakes togeather with raspberries, after than some apples and bread with ham and cheese in work as snacks.

did i mention honey? i will pour that shit on everything. already bought 10kg from local beekeeper. i already have wallnuts in honey, its nice, healthy and filling evening snack i would say.

more pasta, less rice for sure. i realised there is amount of rice i cant get over, i rather eat plain chicken with low kcal ketchup as little dipping sauce that eat more rice. aaand my chicken is crispy and dry so... you can imagine

anyway, it shouldnt be big issue pushing kcals up when needed. from bodybuilding point of view it wont be "cleanest bulk" but i miss variety of food. for months i ate same shit over and over. cant/dont wanna/wont live like that 365 days per year, every year. i guess i will be more fluffy during winter but whatever, i will cut before next summer and it wont be as hard next time.
 
Do subq in hips and glutes. I have nicked a vein couple times in belly too and it get bruised and protruding like a bean. It takes 10-15 days to return to normal.

yea, bruised, sore spots. sucks.
glutes still have plenty of fat for BD slin pins or 30g x 1/2" needles.

i guess with subq it shouldnt matter much where i inject, right? absorption rate/speed is different from what i know but it should be absorbed everywhere
 
yea, bruised, sore spots. sucks.
glutes still have plenty of fat for BD slin pins or 30g x 1/2" needles.

i guess with subq it shouldnt matter much where i inject, right? absorption rate/speed is different from what i know but it should be absorbed everywhere

Yes, i think absorption is a bit faster on the belly due to more blood vessels being there but it doesn't matter, hips and glutes are great too and it still absorbs all the compound.

On glutes i pin straight a half inch needle but in hips i pinch the skin with one hand to avoid hitting any bone there.
 
Yes, i think absorption is a bit faster on the belly due to more blood vessels being there but it doesn't matter, hips and glutes are great too and it still absorbs all the compound.

On glutes i pin straight a half inch needle but in hips i pinch the skin with one hand to avoid hitting any bone there.

i have info from my dermathologist which prescribed me humira pens, i can inject them in belly, quads/hips i guess? and delts. which sucks cause with delts it will be IM, quads also probably. ive tried love handles but holyshit reaction after that was not pleasent. it would be easier with needle than pen tbh but i dont have that option

its quite a bit of subq pins already... hgh, mt2, tirz, reta, humira...

its still weird to inject glutes tbh. even subq, i guess im not used to it, yet. still dont like needles...
 
other than that, life is bit boring. i need to fix my track car, again, cause i wanna attend few trackdays this season, end of september and end of october. during winter i need to work on some stuff on it also, hopefully wont be that expesive... stupid hobby. still thinkin about goin back to bikes and risking my life on every ride...
ooooh, which car if i may ask? gutted slk2somethings are always cheap fun, but i dont know if you got an abundance of those over where you live
 
ooooh, which car if i may ask? gutted slk2somethings are always cheap fun, but i dont know if you got an abundance of those over where you live

its m3 e46 track build. i added pics few pages ago i think.
full race suspension, everything still on uniballs, race brakes, slick tyres, fully stripped interior. basicly my worst financial mistake :D
 
oh you spent MONEY money on that. goddamn

absolute beauty though

also, you dont see many of them on track today. ussuall lineup of new gt3/rs porsche, newer m2/3's, cup cars etc but people stop and check her everywhere. its kindof unicorn in todays world. not many reasons to put money in that anymore other than love for that particular experience.

ofc, around ring there are pleenty of them. but around european go tracks its rare. same for friend that drives heavily modded 997gt3 with manual, race suspension etc. full track build. he has shitload of money in it but its not as fast as new porsches but still, very unique, analog and raw experience
 
thats 10 slk200s, goddamn

yea and driving it is also expensive... whole day on track is one set of slicks, 1/3 - 1/4 of brake pads, 120-150l of 100 octane, nee fluids after 2 days, hotel, food etc etc, ofc track entry, checks/repairs and its rarely under 1k€... stupid hobby (insert facepalm emoji)

buuut its fast.l for its age :D im on par with well built m2 competition track cars with 500+hp, porsche 997 cup cars.
 
another uodate, maybe longer one, will see.

the good:
first training day after week off from gym, push day. soon as i grabbed gymbag after work and put on headphones, i was filled with rage and anger. went to gym, didnt speak to anyone basicly, fueled with internal rage and flustration that i gathered from last week. first excercise is always flat bench dumbell press for chest. i had good warmup with resistance bands, bit of stretching, rotator cuff warmup with super light weights etc. first 3 sets are always warmup, i was super focused on mind muscle connection, pause for few seconds at bottom with good stretch. nice and slow

one 75% set and one all out set. i could push them with so much explosivness, control lowering part with precision, felt every fibre in them, amazing.
after that i couldnt take it lightly today. minimal pauses, everything ended with one all out set fueled by hate and anger. so good. after trainin i checked the pump in locker room (i still feel super weird and fat and ugly doin that....), snapped few pics but my abilitty to pose and make photos is.. well, shit. never mind

today i realised i cant stop gym purely cause of my mind. everyday im there, i let demons out. i gather them every day, keep them inside and in gym relase them into lifting. best preworkout. and for last week i had no relase valve, by the end of the week i had bit "full head" of stuff.

pump was insane tbh. i was "bloated" in midsection as always and any abs i had are/were gone and i did crunches with last super hard set to absolute failure aaaand its not visible (sad noises). whatever.
i could see striations (im not sure if its correct word) in delts, pecs (im starting to grow some chest muscles, yeeeey) and tricep a bit (lot of loose skin there), with veins still present. vascularity took hit as i removed var but thats expected. it was great while it lasted but cant run it forever. its still good enough, my arms just dont look that stupid when pumped (sad noises)
 

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the bad:

yesterday i somehow fucked up delt injection. 0,5ml of test c into left delt. i wanted to give wuds "rest week" cause i rarely pin elsewhere. glutes wre hard to pin alone, to twist. delts are .. i dont like them.
anyway, i was fresh out of shower as always, cleaned hands with alcohol spray, cleaned delt with fresh alcohol pad, attached 30G x 1/2" needle, inserted it into delt and pushed oil in. im not sure what happened but oil and blood came out. not one tiny small drop as sometimes happens but it ran down on my delt. i even aspirated and there was 0 blood in syringe.
i cleaned it with fresh alcohol pad 2 times as it continued to bleed very little. fucking IM shots...

anyway, no pip yesterday or today BUT when i came home from gym, took tshirt down and checked the spot, as soon as i touched it, very small amount of puss came out, like from inflammed pimple.
now the confusing part... i still have some minor acne on delts and there is very small chance its inflammed pimpe but im 99% sure its that injection spot.

its not hot to the touch i think, its bit swolled, like from mosquito bite or something like that. i went to shower right after i came home and cleaned it with alcohol pad after shower.

not gonna lie, im bit freaked out. i dont have antibiotics or anything like that at home, if there will be problem i think i could get some but i would rather not go to my primary doctor cause she will be suuuuper suspicious.

attached photo of that spot, if someone can tell me if it looks bad or not i would be glad..
 

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the bad:

yesterday i somehow fucked up delt injection. 0,5ml of test c into left delt. i wanted to give wuds "rest week" cause i rarely pin elsewhere. glutes wre hard to pin alone, to twist. delts are .. i dont like them.
anyway, i was fresh out of shower as always, cleaned hands with alcohol spray, cleaned delt with fresh alcohol pad, attached 30G x 1/2" needle, inserted it into delt and pushed oil in. im not sure what happened but oil and blood came out. not one tiny small drop as sometimes happens but it ran down on my delt. i even aspirated and there was 0 blood in syringe.
i cleaned it with fresh alcohol pad 2 times as it continued to bleed very little. fucking IM shots...

anyway, no pip yesterday or today BUT when i came home from gym, took tshirt down and checked the spot, as soon as i touched it, very small amount of puss came out, like from inflammed pimple.
now the confusing part... i still have some minor acne on delts and there is very small chance its inflammed pimpe but im 99% sure its that injection spot.

its not hot to the touch i think, its bit swolled, like from mosquito bite or something like that. i went to shower right after i came home and cleaned it with alcohol pad after shower.

not gonna lie, im bit freaked out. i dont have antibiotics or anything like that at home, if there will be problem i think i could get some but i would rather not go to my primary doctor cause she will be suuuuper suspicious.

attached photo of that spot, if someone can tell me if it looks bad or not i would be glad..

looks like a cyst (pimple)
 
looks like a cyst (pimple)

hopefully it is. not gonna lie im bit scared and at the same time i realised that im super underprepared for these situations with meds/stuff i have at home so i should probably research about this and stock up at least in some basics.
 
Doesn't look like it's shot related. More like a pimple. Also, puss to be created from infection it needs time, i doubt it can be formed throughout a day. If i was you I probably zip it or clean with alcohol and pierce it with a fresh needle. It's ready to break. If you see it getting red and that redness spread around it as time passes then it's probably a inflammation from the shot but i doubt it.
 
Doesn't look like it's shot related. More like a pimple. Also, puss to be created from infection it needs time, i doubt it can be formed throughout a day. If i was you I probably zip it or clean with alcohol and pierce it with a fresh needle. It's ready to break. If you see it getting red and that redness spread around it as time passes then it's probably a inflammation from the shot but i doubt it.

damn i hope you are right... i marked it with oen and redness is not spreding so far.
again, reminder to myself to fix goddamn acne and dont pin delts...
 
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