WatchMeMofos
New Member
Please don't be judgmental before reading this. I won't jump into anything before doing extensive research and that's one of the reasons I'm on this forum.
I'm 25 year old and for the last 7 years have been working to rid myself of a mindset that developed over 15+ years of consant bullying. In school I was short, weak, fat, had tits, ugly and on top had a speech impediment that made me sound retarded. I was that runt in your class that you bros probably pitied and tried to defend sometimes from the bulies. Girls didn't even look at me and when I had the courage to ask one out, she laughed in my face and walked off. This one time a guy pulled down my pants in the playground while his friends recorded and circulated the video to everyone, including my crush of years that these guys knew about. Another time a group of people just cornered me and one of them had their younger brother use my face as a punching bag to 'train him'. And yet another time this guy and his girlfriend started rating everyone's attractiveness in the classroom and said I'm by far the ugliest, the girl said -10 and she would rather eat shit than go out with me. No one respected me or treated me as an equal.
At 18 I had enough. I deleted all social media, changed my number, and moved to a university 500 miles away from the small town I grew up in. No one has seen or heard from me for 7 years. During that time I worked on improving myself. I saw a speech therapist who almost completely treated my speech impediment. I cleared up my acne and grew a full beard, and will hopefully be getting a rhinoplasty soon to fix the only remaining issue with my face that I can realistically fix. I lost more than 30kg in weight and had a growth splurt around that time that took me to average height. I worked part-time for years to save up enough money for gynecomastia surgery. Most importantly, I studied day and night and graduated in the top 5% of my class, and was accepted to one of the best law schools in the country. I have a year left after this before I graduate.
And from next year, starting from this summer onwards because I dislocated my shoulder and can't train at the moment, I want to begin the last part of my transformation which is building the most aesthetic body possible. I've been working out sporadically for a long time now but I have low T, which the doctors won't treat because I'm 'still young' and the issue isn't serious enough. I feel dead in the gym no matter how much I control my diet, sleep and routine. The fat in my stomach just won't go, I'm at 65kg or so at 5'9 right now and I don't know how much more weight to lose. I've been in the 50s and the belly was still there though less pronounced. What I've gone through should show you that I'm not lazy or weak-minded, but I just can't seem to fix this one issue.
In 2020 there is a huge reunion in my school and everyone will be attending. I've been using an anonymous account on Facebook to keep track of these people and most of the people who bullied me are now fat and working in dead end jobs. Most of the girls that humiliated me are single mothers. I want to walk into that school as a suited lawyer with an alpha beard, with the confidence that these cunts would never have expected from me, and see their jaws dropped. I want to get on stage and give a speech and strip to show them my chiseled body. I want to have closure on this and move on with my life.
That's why I'm here. I know that naturally I probably can't achieve the body I want in 2 years, if ever. I need help. I want to start with a Test cycle as soon as my shoulder is recovered and begin an optimal routine. I will record my diet and sleep everyday. I've attached a few pictures of my body as it currently stands. What should be my next step?
I'm 25 year old and for the last 7 years have been working to rid myself of a mindset that developed over 15+ years of consant bullying. In school I was short, weak, fat, had tits, ugly and on top had a speech impediment that made me sound retarded. I was that runt in your class that you bros probably pitied and tried to defend sometimes from the bulies. Girls didn't even look at me and when I had the courage to ask one out, she laughed in my face and walked off. This one time a guy pulled down my pants in the playground while his friends recorded and circulated the video to everyone, including my crush of years that these guys knew about. Another time a group of people just cornered me and one of them had their younger brother use my face as a punching bag to 'train him'. And yet another time this guy and his girlfriend started rating everyone's attractiveness in the classroom and said I'm by far the ugliest, the girl said -10 and she would rather eat shit than go out with me. No one respected me or treated me as an equal.
At 18 I had enough. I deleted all social media, changed my number, and moved to a university 500 miles away from the small town I grew up in. No one has seen or heard from me for 7 years. During that time I worked on improving myself. I saw a speech therapist who almost completely treated my speech impediment. I cleared up my acne and grew a full beard, and will hopefully be getting a rhinoplasty soon to fix the only remaining issue with my face that I can realistically fix. I lost more than 30kg in weight and had a growth splurt around that time that took me to average height. I worked part-time for years to save up enough money for gynecomastia surgery. Most importantly, I studied day and night and graduated in the top 5% of my class, and was accepted to one of the best law schools in the country. I have a year left after this before I graduate.
And from next year, starting from this summer onwards because I dislocated my shoulder and can't train at the moment, I want to begin the last part of my transformation which is building the most aesthetic body possible. I've been working out sporadically for a long time now but I have low T, which the doctors won't treat because I'm 'still young' and the issue isn't serious enough. I feel dead in the gym no matter how much I control my diet, sleep and routine. The fat in my stomach just won't go, I'm at 65kg or so at 5'9 right now and I don't know how much more weight to lose. I've been in the 50s and the belly was still there though less pronounced. What I've gone through should show you that I'm not lazy or weak-minded, but I just can't seem to fix this one issue.
In 2020 there is a huge reunion in my school and everyone will be attending. I've been using an anonymous account on Facebook to keep track of these people and most of the people who bullied me are now fat and working in dead end jobs. Most of the girls that humiliated me are single mothers. I want to walk into that school as a suited lawyer with an alpha beard, with the confidence that these cunts would never have expected from me, and see their jaws dropped. I want to get on stage and give a speech and strip to show them my chiseled body. I want to have closure on this and move on with my life.
That's why I'm here. I know that naturally I probably can't achieve the body I want in 2 years, if ever. I need help. I want to start with a Test cycle as soon as my shoulder is recovered and begin an optimal routine. I will record my diet and sleep everyday. I've attached a few pictures of my body as it currently stands. What should be my next step?
