I want to take care not to come off as an egotistical asshole sticking his nose into an argument in order to grab the spotlight for a time.
I've taken some interest in Pharmacom and what i thought was a pretty clear down trend in service and product quality. I thought it warranted my pointing out how what i was witnessing conjured up thoughts and memories of ugl's in days long gone.
I'm a creature of habit and instinct had me calling out reps and members and those that appeared to be shills and bandwagon cheerleaders.
I have to be honest. It felt right. The up and coming star of the aas world that once seemed to have the customers best interest somewhere close to their greed and excitement of a fat bottom line had crossed over to the dark side and needed to be exposed as the tyrants they had become. I thought i felt the people coming to life. The wagons were ready to be circled and meso would show the online BB'ing and Steroid Community how it earned its stripes and why we wouldn't change to fit the mold that the source boards fought so hard to uphold...the almighty dollar vs the bare bones truth. Meso would triumph. The truth always wins in the end.
This shit just isn't fun any longer. What the fuck has happened. I've been reading threads the last couple of nights and i gotta say what i feel is just plain sad. I shake my head and I'm not sure but i think what i feel may be shame?
I tell myself that I'm not that important. As is usual, I don't think I truly believe it but i say it to myself a few times. I mean, c'mon....I'm checking out the join dates of the guys stepping on to the playground for the first time looking to scrap and for the most part they're 2016 guys. Nothing wrong with that. Meso has always been about the new guy. The new kid has to cut his teeth sometime and there are some smart new members out there who have been watching from the sidelines and just like on the playground they can sense something is lacking and the old guard needs to be challenged and some new guys may make a name for themselves and some may not.
I'm not sure where i fit in these days? Back a couple yrs ago and even more recent than that we'd have a guy from the starting line-up relapse publicly. It's never pretty. Its always embarrassing. But it was as like when that uncle of yours had to much to drink at X mas and then exposed some dark family secret while challenging all the male family members to a fistfight.
Soon after, he'd be inconsolable, crying and apologizing to anyone and everyone that would listen. Your dad and other uncles would walk the drunk around the neighborhood while drunk uncle so and so puked and fell down. Everyone made up. Some fences would never be mended but order seemed to be restored nonetheless.
Doesnt feel like that to me here. Most of the new guys don't remember, or care for that matter, about what i would call the Glory Days of the Underground. 2012 i would say it started while peaking in 2014 and now seemingly ending in front of our eyes today in 2016.
I may be to full of myself but i believe i was fortunate enough to have personally ushered in the era and had a role in setting the tone for the few years that followed from 2012. 2013 and 2014 saw what i would call the greatest class of meso talent logging on for the very first time.
If you saw a list of the members that signed up in 2014(a few in 2013) you would agree they are the best of the best....collectively, anyway.
There are some old timers who are awesome or wkm's in every sense of the words. Mands....Dr Jim...Opti..manwhore...and even Paul who has 3 yrs on my registration date.
Meso was something in the Glory Days. It was like the early days of the UFC. Gracie and Shamrock.
Speaking of the old Greats...our very own Brutus79 is on the mend laid up in hospital 20lbs lighter from the shock of surgery and the gall bladder that called for the knife. He text me this morning reaching out the way he does at just the right time. I needed to hear from him. He helps me focus and remember that its not all about me. He reminds me of whats important. First by asking how my Granddaughter was doing...and then by texting a pic of his ugly mug in a hospital gown in bed with tubes up his nose and red weary ears that took nothing away from that genuine smile.
There's something about speaking with a man that has honestly seen the bottom...a man who has seen how disgusting and desperately hopeless a human being(himself) can become in this world.
A guy, who will tell you that he was only able to be part of what is a wonderful comeback story by living a pitifully self serving existence as he did.
Brutus helps me to be grateful for what i have. His attitude helps me recognize whats really important in this world. I've been to the bottom a few times. I've come to believe I'm addicted to the comeback?
Enough about me.
@Big_paul ...I'm worried about you, brother. You're not in your right mind.
@Docd187123 ...i have the utmost respect for you...but please...is being right more important than a mans life? Put the ego aside and if you cant see that you're boxing with a one armed man...simply stand down. If your hatred or whatever it is that is having you pick apart Paul while the new guys cheer is so great that you cant stop yourself then I'm asking that you fucking knock it off. You win. As smart as you are I'm starting to think that youre missing something upstairs. The man needs help.
The rest of us know you aren't a rep of any kind. I speak openly about your respected place in the Community. One of the smartest we have. A little compassion goes a long way.
Paul...i dont know you very well...but youre one of us. Reach out and get it together...please.
