My PCT Journal to kickstart HPTA post HRT

[hackskii]

Sorry to hear Big

Good luck eeso


BigAK, I am thinking that in the pricess of firing up your LH to signal test prodiction you are at a low, this should pass.
For me I notice clomid works far better than nolva (for me) for bringing the HP part of the HPTA online.
Bro, I hope you ride this wave out, it will get better.

 

[pmgamer18]

Day 20:

Probably one of the worst days I've had so far on this PCT... First, had a horrible night sleeping... then woke up and headed to work. This week, I'm taking a class at work that requires alot of mental effort. I don't even know how I lasted through today's class... I had anxious feelings all day today as if there's something wrong but can't put my hand on it... to fix it.

Towards the evening (now), I felt extremely exhausted. . almost fell asleep at the wheels on the way home... Then at the house, I just walk around restless not knowing what to do. My wife just gave me an Ambien to help me sleep. It knocks me out, I may skip my next dose of Clomid.

Also.... My appetite is gone... Altough I'm hungry, I am too freaking nervious to eat... I am losing weight...

Do you guys think things would start coming back up for me???

I am going to do bloodwork on Thursday that measures test, LH, FSH, and prolactin.

Big when you do the blood test do Estradiol it can be to low or to high shounds to me like it may be out of the zone of 10 to 30 on a test.

 

[BigAk]

Sorry to hear Big

Good luck eeso


BigAK, I am thinking that in the pricess of firing up your LH to signal test prodiction you are at a low, this should pass.
For me I notice clomid works far better than nolva (for me) for bringing the HP part of the HPTA online.
Bro, I hope you ride this wave out, it will get better.

Thank you hackskii... I think you are correct on this one.... My levels had to get down enough in order for my pituitary to start firing LH... Since I've been shutdown for a long time, it makes sense that my pituitary is still lazy.. But, hopefully it's getting back in action.

 

[BigAk]

Hey mate I'm starting my PCT today.

1st of August and everything. Probably won't keep a log as I don't really wanna analyse myself constantly - just gonna ride it out.

I'm excited to start. A little bit anxious last couple of days about other issues, but keen to get through this thing. Hoping clomid doesn't make me too depressed.

Doc is fully supporting me, i can get blood tests whenever I want.

Will let u know how i go : )

eeso.... I wish you the best during this venture brother... You see what I'm going through... Hopefully, it will be easier on you. One thing you have is the awesome support everyone has been giving me here.. It's truly inspiring... dunno what to do without it.. Please keep us updated with your progress and your plans.

 

[BigAk]

Day 21:

Well.... You guys may think I'm crazy... but I feel much better today. I have no clue why I'm going through intervals of ups and downs... yesterday was absolutely herendous.. Today it's a walk in the park.... beats the heck out of me....

Anyways... Due to the Ambien my wife gave me last night, I crashed asleep in no time around 8pm... I woke up around 2:30 but went back to sleep until 5:00... Although I didn't feel horrible, I was scared it was going to be another day of horror.... But, I headed to work anyway...

This afternoon, after I had to force myself to eat, I felt a bit sleepy... However, after a cup of coffee, I felt like a new man... No depression... no anxiousness... no trouble... thank God.

I pray that I won't have another bad day like yesterday.... It's just too crazy.... I mean.. I felt bad on Sat... then good on Sunday... REALLY bad on Monday... then today Tuesday I'm like a new man..

I don't get it..... Any ideas???

 

[hackskii]

I use melatonin when I cant sleep, but take it early as it gives me sortof a hang over.

Alcohol will raise estrogen if that is what you are doing BigAk.

From here on out it should get better and better.

 

[chap]

I'll refrain from giving out much advice as my theories are at odds with the masses here...

One thing I will say, and I say this to give you some support in sticking it out, is that your pct really truly only started maybe yesterday or so, after the influence of the hcg was over, so things might be rough at first, but stick it out, it only gets better.

My first week of heavy serms and next to no endogenous testosterone were pretty rough, emotional, weak, not much will to even get out of bed, but things turned around for the better very rapidly around the 5th day and stayed good since.... libido is not an indicator to be concerned about, it will probably be bad for a fair while while your hormones need to get in balance again naturally. I don't think arimidex is a good idea at all.

Good luck and hang in there.... think of the light at the end of the tunnel, freedom from having to stick a needle in yourself just to feel half normal.

by the way, I feel really really healthy and good, libido is not teenage style, but at my age that would be unrealistic, but other than that my mood is good, thinking is sharp, skin is clear, feel strong, feel healthy....

 

[BigAk]

I use melatonin when I cant sleep, but take it early as it gives me sortof a hang over.

Alcohol will raise estrogen if that is what you are doing BigAk.

From here on out it should get better and better.

Luckily I don't drink alcohol at all hachskii....

I got zinc today.... I will be taking it before bed time... but how much?? and what exactly does it do to help in my case??

 

[pmgamer18]

Luckily I don't drink alcohol at all hachskii....

I got zinc today.... I will be taking it before bed time... but how much?? and what exactly does it do to help in my case??

I don't take my zinc at night it keeps me up try 50mgs in the morning after you eat and at noon. After one month cut back to just in the morning. For every 50 mgs. you take of Zinc you need to take 2 mgs of Copper Zinc uses up your Copper. This is the only brand I have found that has both.
http://www.myvitanet.com/zincop100cnt.html
You can take it for some time before your Copper starts to go down.

 

[BigAk]

I'll refrain from giving out much advice as my theories are at odds with the masses here...

One thing I will say, and I say this to give you some support in sticking it out, is that your pct really truly only started maybe yesterday or so, after the influence of the hcg was over, so things might be rough at first, but stick it out, it only gets better.

My first week of heavy serms and next to no endogenous testosterone were pretty rough, emotional, weak, not much will to even get out of bed, but things turned around for the better very rapidly around the 5th day and stayed good since.... libido is not an indicator to be concerned about, it will probably be bad for a fair while while your hormones need to get in balance again naturally. I don't think arimidex is a good idea at all.

Good luck and hang in there.... think of the light at the end of the tunnel, freedom from having to stick a needle in yourself just to feel half normal.

by the way, I feel really really healthy and good, libido is not teenage style, but at my age that would be unrealistic, but other than that my mood is good, thinking is sharp, skin is clear, feel strong, feel healthy....

Chap... Thank you for your support and for keeping an eye on me here.. It inspires me to hear that you're doing awesome. I'm glad for you.

Yeah.... I realize that my LH only started firing maybe just yesterday or so... God help me keep up my patience with this!!

I'm not worried about my libido in the midst of all things... It will come when this is all said and done. I'm not going to touch the Arimidex.

 

[hackskii]

We are all different.
No one shoe fits all.
I like zinc (50mg) before bed, it helps me sleep. Phil it keeps awake. Different strokes if you will.
What ever works, works.

The lull in your LH is to be expected.
Testicles are firing so it is up to the HP to do their job.
It will get better.

As Chap said the a-dex should be avoided, trust me you will get through this.

Zinc is a natural aromatase inhibitor, good for testosterone support. Deficiencies will hinder test production.

Stick with the plan mate, you WILL succeed..................

 

[BigAk]

Day 22:

Well... Today has been another easy day on me... sort of like yesterday. However, I was a bit scared in the morning that I was going to have a bad day... but things went well all day ... thank God....

I felt good enough to head to the gym after a few weeks off since I started feeling horrible. I was actually surprised that my strength was there... Although, I didn't attempt to push like I usually do, I was happy to be able to do the weight I did. After the workout though, I felt a bit tired... then the scared feeling came about for a little while.

Still no libido... However!!!!..... I don't know what this may mean, but I was able to ejaculate successfully in the early morning upon rise. I thought I'd try it and see... I didn't have trouble.... Although I didn't achieve a great erection, I was almost getting there though... Again... that was a surprise and I don't know what it means... I hope that it means that I'm on my way to recovery. Today will mark one week since my last HCG shot... Therefore, whatever test I have is what I've produced from my LH.

Testes size is good... full and solid.. They even don't get smaller towards the evening hours like they used to do with the HCG. Again; I don't know what this means!!! But, I'm happy about it.

So.. in summary, I felt alright all day... At some points I even thought I was pretty happy, calm, and encouraged.. If I can feel this way all the time, I'd be a happy man. I pray I won't have to go through another day like day 20... That day was by far, my worst day since I started this PCT.

 

[hackskii]

Lets do some math here.
Day 5 after your last shot of HCG you felt bad/wrong..
Well, the half life can be anywhere from 3-5 days with HCG.
So that lull I commented on was due to the HCG wearing off and natural testosterone taking over.

Dude, if you are ejaculating then this is very good.
This means better days for sure.
You had normal test levels during HCG therapy, which means that the nuts are producing, now it is only time where your HP will fire.

Your strength in the gym is reassuring and dont feel like you have to hold back as even intensity will spark GH and test production. What I am trying to say is let her rip in the gym.

Libido will come, just be patient.

Testicle size, well, this is no indication of test production, so again just relax. Stress is not good for cortisol and cortisol is not good for test production. Trust me you are coming along just fine.

You will be a happy man once this is all over with and settled, please trust me and stay calm. This is good advice.

 

[BigAk]

hackskii... Thank you for the encouraging words brother!!! I sure need them. I'm trying to keep a positive attitude throughout this whole thing....

 

[BigAk]

Day 23:

Overall I feel like things are getting better. But, this morning I woke up and felt tired still... as if I didn't have a good night sleep... Even after a cup of coffee, I yawned all the way to work. This feeling made me a bit nervous thinking that I'm crashing again.. Then I started researching about the side effects of St. John's Wort on some people. I found this:

St. John's Wort Side effects
The most common St. John's wort side effect is insomnia, which is likely to be worse on higher doses. Headaches and irritability or anxiety have also been reported. Sensitivity to light is another St. John's wort side effect.

I hope that that's what has been causing this feeling every morning... I have decided to leave St. John's Wort alone.

This feeling has been gone since lunch... Now it's about 4:30 pm and I feel just fine and calm ... I have not had the ol' "pop quiz" feeling for the past few days.

It's like I'm going through a roller coaster.... I'd be fine for a while then negative feelings start to creep up on me.. Overall, I'm feeling far more good than bad... which is a good sign.

Still no libido today.... testes size is very good though... I hope it's not in my head, but often times they even feel bigger than they were while on HCG. I will be doing blood work sometime next week towards the end of my clomid intake. This will help me assess where I stand.

 

[keninottawa]

You're doing great, BigAk! I'm glad that you feel as though things are on the up-and-up.

 

[BigAk]

You're doing great, BigAk! I'm glad that you feel as though things are on the up-and-up.

Thank you keninottawa for your support.... If feels great to read all the encouraging remarks.

 

[BigAk]

Day 23:

Evening Update...

This is the craziest thing ever.... So, I leave work around 5pm feeling alright. It's a long ride about 40mins... I was kind of hungry. My wife had asked me to swing by and pick us up a pizza. By the time I got home, I felt lathergic, irritated, and tired... sort of like I felt on day 20 but not half as much the intensity. I thought to myself, it's another downward swing and decided to ride it out... I ate two pieces of pizza and layed in bed like a slug thinking this is going to be a long hard road.... I mean I was so exhausted like I'had stayed up all night.

So.. here I am watching Shark Week on TV.... My wife next to me... All the sudden one thing led to another and before I knew it, we were endulging in some of the best actions I've had in a long time.. It felt like the times a while back prior to HRT.... Erection was surprisingly excellent... rigid and lasting... After we're done, we just busted out laughing .... LOL ... I mean... it's crazy ... one minute I felt like I have a foot in the grave... The next minute I am a sex machine... LOL... This has been the highlight of the entire month for me..

I just don't know what to make out of this sudden surprising experience.... How can I fluctuate in mood and energy so quickly???... I mean.. I felt shitty from 6pm to 8pm... then after that I felt I was on top of the world... No complains though.... I was very happy to realize that maybe I'm recovering slowly but surely. I'm glad I'm getting glimpse of libido coming around.... hahaha!!

 

[eeso]

Dude i rekcon u just over-analyse yourself. : )

 

[BigAk]

Dude i rekcon u just over-analyse yourself. : )

Yeah... you may be right eeso.... That's what my wife says.... I think the reason is that I have no visual aspect as to what my hormone levels at any given time. Therefore, I rely too much on how I'm feeling. I'll be doing blood work towards the end of next week.